What Life Has To Offer, Part 1
by kruemi
Summary: Abigail dies but Hannah lives. Sully runs away nevertheless. When Michaela comes to CS, she takes care of Hannah. How will Sully react when he finally comes back?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. The rights to those characters and to the show belong to the creators of the show, to CBS, The Sullivan Company and to A&E.

_**What life has to offer**_

**Prologue**

Sully paced the yard in front of his homestead. Since the day his mother died and left him alone at the age of ten, all he ever wanted was a family and now it was about to happen. That is, he was married for five years already. Soon, however, this night or tomorrow morning, the family would be complete. He heard his wife´s screams from inside of the house and he and his father- in- law, Loren Bray, covered their ears simultaneously by a especially loud cry. Although Loren disapproved of his daughter´s choice and didn´t even speak with her since the wedding, today he was there. In his opinion, a miner wasn´t good enough for his little girl. But he didn´t know anything about him, Sully thought.

_After his decision to build his own family one day, the ten year old Byron Sully left New York, left his life as a child behind and went West. His friend Daniel Simon, who was the same age and dreamed of becoming rich, went with him. Gradually moving away from the East they spent the warm seasons mostly in the woods and during the winters they took odd jobs in the towns they passed. When they were fourteen they started to work in different mines. The saved the money that they didn´t need for living. One day when they were around the age of sixteen, the men they worked with thought itwould do them some good to become aquainted with the saloons. The saloon ladies were thrilled when they saw the two of them and decided it was time to make them "men". For a while both reveled in this newly discovered feelings but after a terrible hangover Sully woke up and knew that this wasn´t the way to build a family. From this day on, he never stepped in a saloon again, at least not for entertainement._

_At the age of twenty, they reached Colorado Springs and Sully met eighteen year old Abigail Bray. He knew it right from the start that she would be his wife. He found Abigail young and sweet and beautiful and full of fire. She fell in love with him right away. They married as soon as he had built the homestead on the land Abigail´s mother Maude had given them._

And now here he was waiting for the arrival of their first child. The screams came more frequently now and after an especially terrible one they heard a baby´s cry. The men looked at each other and waited impatiently for Maude or Charlotte Cooper, the midwife, to let them in or at least to show the child to them. But nothing happened. The quiet from inside the house seemed to penetrate the walls and started to choke them. Sully´s heart pounded wildly and when Maude finally came out with a little bundle in her arms he could hardly walk to her.

"It´s a girl!" For a short moment Sully´s face beamed but then he asked anxiously, "Abigail?"

Maude's expression was serious. "She is bleeding heavily, but Charlotte does all she can."

"No!" He rushed to the door .

"Sully, please, there is nothing you can do!" But he didn´t listen. He stormed into his house and stopped abruptly by the sight his eyes met. Abigail laid on their bed, white like the sheets, motionless. Everywhere, on the bed, on the floor, was blood. Charlotte turned to him. "You should wait outside, Sully."

"I want to be with my wife! At least I want to hold her hand!" He approached the women, more tentatively now.

"She is gone, Sully," Charlotte said quietly as she rose frome the edge of the bed and wiped her bloody hands on a towel.

"But that can´t be! We have a little girl now. She needs her, I need her! She can´t leave us alone just like that!" He wasn't ready to accept the truth.

"Sully, I´m so sorry…"

He didn´t listen to her, he knelt next to the bed and took Abigails hands in his.

"Abby, do you hear me? You have to be strong, Abby. I promise, I´ll do everything you want. But please, please don´t leave me! Do you hear me? Abby!"

Maude couldn´t hold back her tears any longer. After hearing Sully's pleading, Maude and Loren stepped into the room as well.

"What´s the matter?" Loren demanded.

Charlotte couldn´t look at them. "I´m terribly sorry, Loren, Maude: I couldn´t help her. She lost too much blood."

Maude swayed and the midwife quickly reached for the baby. Loren´s face was petrified with terror. He turned towards Sully, "This is all your fault. You knew perfectly well what the doctor in Denver had said. Her body wasn´t made for giving childbirth! She should never had married you!" Sully´s face drained all the colour that was left. He let go of his wife's hand and rose slowly. "Maybe I didn´t deserve her. But she longed for a baby so much, I couldn´t deny her that!"

Sully walked over to Charlotte to take his daughter from her. He desperately wanted to feel this little piece of his dream , he needed to keep it near by himself.

In the meantime, the infant cried with all its might. The little face was red and the teethless mouth was opened wide to let out all the anger about the lack of a soothing voice or a warm skin to lean on. Sully clumsily cradled the child and tried to calm it down but with no result.

"Maybe it is better Maude or I take care of her", Charlotte tentatively suggested.

Sully, however, instantly set her straight. "No! I´m the father, I will raise her."

"Sully, no one said you can´t raise her; but do you know how to take care of a newborn? We only want to help", the midwife tried to reason with him.

But the young father insisted, "This is my doughter, I'm gonna take care of her!"

"Like you took care of mine?" As Loren spoke his voice rose. "We all know what good it will do to this child."

Sully´s tone was low. "I think it's better you all leave now."

Nobody moved.

"Go! Don´t you understand? I want to be alone with my family!" Sully choked out the words.

Charlotte laid her hand on his shoulder. "We´ll talk to Jake and the reverend, so they can prepare the funeral."

Sully didn´t respond. He sat down on the floor next to the bed with his wife´s body on it, the newborn still in his arms. Their doughter´s cries and his desperate sobs mingled.

Two hours later Jake came to take Abigail´s body. Sully made only a weak attempt to stop him. The reverend tried to pray with the desperate new father but he received only an angry reply, "What kind of God can let this happen! Why should I speak to him? You better go, leave me alone."

At this moment the infant started to cry again.

"Did you already feed her?" the reverend asked.

"What?" Sully looked somewhat shocked at the clergyman.

The reverend took a closer look. "And you should diaper and dress her."

He hadn´t thought of that either. "I will."

After the two men had left, Sully searched for the clothes. There was a trunk full of them, neatly folded by his wife. It took his breath away and the tears came again. He found a bottle but he didn´t know how to prepare the content and for the first time he asked himself if he actually could take care of his daughter.

As if Charlotte Cooper had heard his thoughts, her knock came from the door and Sully was relieved to see her. She showed him what was necessary and asked him before she left: "Are you sure you want to do this alone?"

"I am." he answered sincerely.

Before she left, the midwife informed the young man, "The funeral will be the day after tomorrow at noon."

For the next fourty eight hours Sully was alone with his child. Every waking moment it cried. The cries only ceased when he fed her or exhaustion took over. He didn´t know what to do. Maybe this was the girl´s way of trying to tell him he didn´t deserve her.

At the funeral the cries became even worse. Before he took the shovel from the reverend, he handed his little girl to Maude. And now, for the first time, the infant became quiet. This quiet echoed through Sully´s head and was worse than the noise. He met the grandmother´s teary eyes and recognized the implore and he understood.

"Her name is Hannah."

The older woman nodded and Sully turned back to the grave, threw the soil on the casket, turned towards the woods and went away.

He hadn´t slept for three days now and he didn´t care. He walked. It was all he was able to do. He walked. He walked away from Abigail´s dead body, he walked away from his daughter´s cries, he walked away from his pain. After he couldn´t walk anymore, he lay down and closed his eyes. He couldn´t keep a family so he didn´t need to breath.

Since he couldn´t find a family to live with, his family found him. Sully didn´t realize it though.

At the same time in Boston, Massachusetts, Dr. Michaela Quinn´s world fell apart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1**

A lonely stagecoach crossed the Colorado plains. A young woman, actually she was thirty years old, looked out of one of the windows, lost in thought. Here she was, Michaela Quinn, in the middle of nowhere, trying to start a new life. The last six months had been very painful for her. Her mind wandered back.

_After she had kept vigil next to her father's bed for three days he left her. She was alone. In order to not break down in front of her mother's eyes she did what she had learnt to do: she pushed the emotions in the back of her being. She knew she couldn't count on her mother who had disapproved of all she had done in her entire life. She hadn't respected her wish to become a doctor, had even called it ridiculous and improper. After Michaela had finished medical school her mother had told her that she could only work as a doctor because her father couldn´t stop spoiling her and indulged in letting his daughter work with him. _

_After the funeral it became evident to her that at this point, her mother was right. She had worked side by side with her father for seven years and the other doctors in the hospital had grudgingly acknowledged her presence. It now became obvious they had done that only because of her father. No one wanted to work with her now and Elizabeth Quinn had closed the office of her late husband. At every door Michaela introduced herself she was rebuffed. She was used to constant rejections but now the only person who had constantly supported her all these years was gone. _

_Finally she found an advertisement that a little town at the frontier was looking for a doctor. She answered it and as a precaution told them she was a woman and they told her nevertheless she could come. She hoped that they not only would tolerate her but also learn to accept her._

Now here she was. In the distance she could already see a mountain range. The driver had told her it would only take two hours from here to arrive at her final destination.

The mainstreet of Colorado Springs was unusually crowded. The members of the town's council were in the middle of a discussion. "I told you we don't need no doctor let alone a darn woman," Jake Slicker, the barber, muttered under his breath.

"Jake, we already had this discussion. The town is growing. I don´t know what we had done if the flu had reached us. Do you know how many have died in Soda Springs? They lost half the town!" The Reverend Timothy Johnson was tired of those constant arguments with Jake.

"Aww… leave it be, Jake." Loren now entered the discussion. "All I want is to finally sleep a whole night again. Wasn't it you who told me we should see a doctor about Hannah? If the doc can make stop her crying I don't care if it's a woman!"

Hank, the barkeeper, smirked. "Know what I think? Must be a mannish woman if she's workin' in a man's place. Maybe she even has a mustache!" He was very pleased with himself about this joke.

"Stage is coming, stage is coming!" seven year old Brian Cooper shouted as he ran towards the men. By now there were nearly twenty people standing around curiously awaiting the arrival of the new doctor.

The stagecoach drove in in a huge cloud of dust and pulled up in front of Bray's Mercantile. The door opend and suddenly the women who were standing there gasped because of the fancy clothes the emerging woman was wearing. The men were equally stunned. Even Hank was speechless for a moment, but he quickly caught himself. "Look what we have here! This could be interesting!"

Her medical bag firmly held in her left hand, the right one on top of her hat, Michaela glanced out at the crowd. She was fully aware of the townsfolk's stares, though she didn't think they had anything to do with her appearance. She was used to this reaction because she was a woman _and_ a doctor. So she didn't give it a second thought. Her only problem at the moment was how to get down to the soiled street nearly two feet under her shoes.

Finally the reverend broke the spell. He stepped forward and helped her out of the coach. "It is nice to meet you, Miss Quinn." The Reverend shook her hand suddenly unsure of his decision.

Michaela automatically amended "That's Dr. Quinn, sir. Dr. Michaela Quinn."

"Of course, of course," the reverend tried to compose himself. "The town's council made some preparations for your arrival. Oh sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Reverend Timothy Johnson."

Jake still was not sure if she was real. He had never seen such a beautiful creature before. He stepped forward too and grasped for her hand. If he could feel her then she wasn't a dream.

"Ahem, Jake Slicker, madam." He couldn't help but adding, "I make the doctoring around here."

"Another doctor?" Michaela was confused. Why did they call for her if they already had a doctor?

"Aww, Jake! Can't you just stop that?" now Loren joined in. He turned to Michaela and explained, "He's the barber, that's all." Reaching out his hand he said, "Loren Bray. I own the mercantile here. And if you're settled in at the clinic, I have an ill child."

Michaela was relieved. It seemed they actually needed her. "I could examine the child right now; you only have to show me where to go." Michaela smiled reassuringly at Loren.

"But shouldn't you first…" the reverend tried to make his point.

"It's alright, reverend, we can take care of my things later." Michaela was already on her way to follow Loren leaving the astonished townsfolk behind.

Entering the mercantile Loren shouted for his wife. "Maude, the doctor is here!"

From above came the faint cries of a baby and a woman's voice. "Could she come upstairs?"

Seeing the infant Michaela was instantly alarmed. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Aw, she's crying all the time, that's happening." Loren lost his patience. "Do something, I can't take it anymore!"

"Why don't you go downstairs, Loren, I'm sure there are some costumers waiting," Maude suggested. Slightly grunting the storekeeper left.

"She has to do what?" Loren some fifteen minutes later exclaimed disbelievingly.

"Your granddaughter suffers from a navel hernia and the only way to help her is an operation," Michaela patiently explained.

"Do you even know what you are talking about? No one cuts my girl open!" Loren's temper rose.

There it was again. Michaela was sure if she had been a man he never would have doubted the diagnosis and the way of treatment. She straightened up, raised her chin and looked directly in his eyes. Her tone was determined. "I'm sure you are aware of the fact that Hannah's state of health has dramatically worsened during the last few days. You have probably noticed that she can't keep her meals down. She's getting weaker, Mr. Bray."

Loren looked less self-confident now. Michaela continued, "There is a tear in her stomach muscle around the navel." She turned to Maude. "Did she cry a lot when she was younger?" Maude nodded yes. The doctor's speech was directed at Loren again. "The intestine pokes through the hole. I have to move the bowels back to their right place and then sew up the tear. If I don't, the hernia could become strangulated. In fact I'm sure this is already the case here. If I don't operate, cut off the gangrene tissue this girl will die for sure. If your mannish pride could overlook the fact I'm a woman just for a moment I can save your granddaughter's life. And for your information , I am not new at this profession. I've been a doctor for seven years already, not to mention the experience I had with my father before receiving my degree. Hannah's suffering won't go away like a cold, Mr. Bray."

Suddenly aware they weren't alone in the store Michaela stood up even straighter and Loren grudgingly gave in.

In the evening an exhausted Michaela sat next to a cot where little Hannah rested peacefully now. The last few hours had seemed to be flown by. After the discussion with Loren, a slightly hesitant Reverend had explained to her what the town had planned. Charlotte Cooper couldn't afford to support the boarding house any longer, so the town had rented the downstairs floor for the new doctor and Charlotte kept the rooms upstairs for herself and her three kids.

Although the Reverend had become nervous about the woman's acceptance of this, Michaela was actually very pleased. The town had even prepared one of the rooms with an examining table, made by the town's blacksmith Robert E., which was very helpfully during the operation. One of the other rooms she took for herself and the third room would become a recovery room.

Until she would be fully settled down, Charlotte had invited her to take the meals with her family. Michaela was grateful and had accepted the proposal for that evening. Little Brian couldn't take his eyes off of the beautiful lady. Colleen, a 12 year old fair-haired girl had been amazed at the prospect of an accomplished woman. "You are a real doctor? You went to college and everything?"

"And everything," Michaela had answered her.

Only the eldest son Matthew, who was already sixteen, had seemed to be slightly embarrassed by her presence. Michaela enjoyed the meal with the small family, but her thoughts were most centered in relief that the operation had gone well. Charlotte had helped her with the chloroform and the light. And now all she had to do was observe the healing process. Although he had hesitated , Loren had eventually agreed that Hannah stayed with the doctor in the clinic.

So here she was awaiting the challenges the life in this town would face her with.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2 

The Cheyenne village, which was settled down in a clearing near Willow Creek, still slept. As dawn was nearing slight movements could be detected in one of the teepees, though they were only observed from afar by watchful eyes. The tribe's medicine man Cloud Dancing spoke in hushed tones with his wife Snowbird, from time to time emphasizing his words with gestures. Now and then Cloud Dancing let his concerned glances wander to his still sleeping friend, whom he considered a brother already. Since the day he had found him closer to death than to life he deeply cared for him.

Finally the man stirred. He slowly opened his ocean-blue eyes and locked them with the dark brown ones of his brother.

"Good morning, my friend", the medicine man spoke. Sully slowly rose in a sitting position, taking a deep breath. He remained silent while he listened to his friend. "This will be a difficult day for you. Your body is healed for a long time now but your spirit is not." The white man lowered his eyes, knowing the truth in the Indian's words. Cloud Dancing continued:" The spirits talked to me. You have to go on a vision quest to find your way again. You will go to the Black Hills."

Sully's head shot up. "Why so far away?"

"I do not know.The spirits showed me the place in a dream.They said this is where you must go." The Indian laid his hands assuringly on the younger man's shoulders. "When you come back you will know what to do."

Two hours later Sully was ready for his departure. He stood next to his horse exchanging last words with his friend. Finally he grasped arms with Cloud Dancing in the Cheyenne greeting manner.

He was about to mount his horse when a young Indian woman reached for his arm before he could do so. "Wait", she said quietly, her almost black eyes gazing in his. "I want you to take this with you." She gave him a small round item that was artfully knotted and decorated with beads and strings. "It will catch your bad dreams." She smiled, suddenly nervous because it became obvious that Sully's already palpable tension increased. He searched with unsteady fingers through the beadstrings he wore as necklaces, finally grasping one and taking it off. "You were a good companion to me. Thank you." He hang it around her neck. He couldn't give any promises right now, only one. He mounted his horse. "I'll see you soon" he sincerely spoke looking down at the group of Indians who had come to bid him good bye. He bowed his head almost imperceptible and rode away.

Snowbird had watched it all with a slight smile on her face and was startled when her husband reacted sternly:"Flying Sun, I told you before he is still lost. Now you gave him one more sorrow on his way. This is not doing him any good."

Snowbird tried to mediate. "It is good if he knows someone is waiting for him."

Cloud Dancing grew angry now:" No, it is not. This only means pressure for him. He still has a lot to deal with. He don't need a woman waiting for him and having expectations." With this he walked away. The women stood there in silence for a moment, but when they looked at each other they smiled. Men didn't know anything.

This same day in the early spring only a few miles away Michaela stepped out of the clinic door, little Hannah firmly holding on her hip. Both of them blinked when the still low morning sun hit their eyes. They took a deep breath of the crisp air simultaneously, too. Today the girl would have a great day, she only didn't know it yet. It was her first birthday. Michaela smiled down at her."Why don't we go see grandpa and grandma?" Hannah nodded eagerly and smiled back, propping her thumb in her mouth.

Suddenly a deep, slightly slurred voice came from across the street: "Do you call it proper having a child without a husband, Michaela? I could expand my business and find you one!" Hank smirked. He couldn't resist teasing the lady doctor every time he saw her.

"A good morning to you too, Hank. And thank you, but no, I'm perfectly fine the way I am."

She turned towards the mercantile. It was a part of her morning routine for a few weeks now, first she would bring Hannah to her grandparents and then start her day at the clinic. During the last half year she had set some broken bones, sewed up several cuts and healed some coughs and stomach- aches. The only serious challenge Maude had given her three months ago. They had called for her in the middle of the night when Hannah's grandmother had suffered a heart attack. Michaela had offered to take the girl with her that night and they had gratefully accepted. Since then it had become a habit that the girl slept with her in the little room she now called her home. Although it was a bit crowded with the two of them, Michaela didn't mind a bit. If she was honest she had to admit that she already had opened up her heart to little Hannah.

In the afternoon they all met at Grace's Café. Horace, the telegraph operator, Charlotte and her children, Robert E., Loren and Maude, and even Jake, and of course Michaela with the guest of honor on her lap were settled around a large table. They had already sung "Happy Birthday" and now it was time for the cake. Grace brought it and placed it in front of the girl. Colleen helped her with the candle and soon only content eating noises were heard. Unnoticed by the others Maude and Loren exchanged a glance.

Maude cleared her throat:" Dr. Mike?"

Michaela looked at her. Noticing the greyish tinge to her skin she asked:" Are you alright Maude?"

The older woman nodded. "No need to worry. It is…Loren and I talked…well…we wanted to ask you…", her voice trailed off.

"Aaw, just say it Maude", Loren impatiently joined in. Maude tried to compose herself.

"We wanted to ask you if you could take Hannah in." She let out the breath she was holding relieved she had finally said it.

Michaela was too stunned to speak. Finally she cleard her throat:" I don't know what to say. I'm honored but I think it wouldn't be right."

"Why not?" Loren didn't understand. "She practically already lives with you. Of course we will take her as often as we can but Maude's not been feeling well these last weeks…" His concerned look wandered to his wife.

Michaela was instantly alarmed. "Why didn't you tell me?" She studied the older woman's face watchfully.

Maude felt uneasy with the doctor's gaze on her. "It's nothing, Dr. Mike. But it would help a lot if I had not the whole responsibilities as far as Hannah is concerned. Of course I love her and I want to have her around as much as possible but…", again her voice trailed off.

"I understand", Michaela stated. "I'd love to help, it's only…". She took a deep breath. "My room is already feeling crowded with just me there, but to really live there with a child…"

"Aw, we already took care of that", now Loren spoke again. "Actually the women went out to the homestead where our daughter lived.They cleaned it up a little bit so it is ready for you."

Michaela's now perplexed gaze went to Charlotte. "You knew about this?" Charlotte nodded. "Don't be angry, Dr. Mike but we all know this little girl needs a place she knows it means to be home", and she bend over to caress the girl's blond scalp. "She needs a fixed point in her life. And we all think you've already been that for a while."

Now Colleen couldn't wait any longer:" It would be great, Dr. Mike. I could come out there and help you if you want. I'd love to do it!" She looked eagerly at the woman she had been admiring since the first day they had met.

Michaela was still unsure. "What about her father, it's his house, isn't it?" Before anyone else could answer Loren interfered again :" I can't remember seeing him around here in the last year. He took off, I hope I will never see his face again!" His voice rose with every word he spoke.

"Loren, please, he was so confused and despaired…" Maude tried to calm down her husband but with no result. " And we were not! We lost our only child!" The old man was screaming now.

Hannah, alarmed by the loud and angry voice of her grandpa started to cry. Maude's face suddenly paled and she covered her chest with her hands one laying on top of the other. Michaela's reaction came promptly. She handed Hannah over to Charlotte, reached for her medical bag she had secured under her chair and was at Maude's side in a rush. She grasped for her wrist to feel the pulse. She reassuringly spoke to her patient:" Sh, sh…You must calm down, Maude. I will give you something." In the meantime everyone was standing around them. The doctor spoke:"Please, you all should sit down again. Fortunately it is not as bad as it looks. We only need a glass of water." Her eyes searched for Grace but the black woman had already brought it. Michaela mixed a powder in the water and Maude drank it. Her colour slowly came back. "Alright?" the doctor asked. Maude tried a small smile and nodded her head. Loren watched his wife with a guilty expression. "I'm sorry, Maude."

"It's alright, Loren," she assured. "But you didn't answer yet, Dr. Mike", and she turned back to her.

"Well, I think…"

"Come on, Dr. Mike. It would be fun!" Colleen joined in again. "Why don't you see it this way: It's Hannah's house and you live there with her." Expectantly the girl watched Michaela's face.

"Alright, I'll do it." She noticed a collective sigh of relief. It was obviuos now that she was the only one who didn't know about the grandparents' plan. She took Hannah back on her lap from Charlotte and kissed the top of the little girl's head. Then she wispered in her ear:" You and me, sweetheart, we will make it."

She lifted her head again looking around at all the people gathered at the table and couldn't suppress a big smile any longer," I'll do it!"

Three months later Sully returned from his quest.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 3 

It was already midsummer when Sully finally came back. He carefully approached the clearing and stopped his horse outside the Cheyenne village. Although he was glad to be here again he only wanted to see Cloud Dancing at first . So he used his bird call and it worked. The Indian stepped out of his teepee and listened watchfully. The repeated call sent him in the right direction and after a few moments the two men were united in a tight embrace. " Ha ho, my friend," the medicine man spoke, "it is good to see you again."

"I'm glad to be back too", Sully smiled. "I made a few decisions. I know now what I am responsible for and what was not in my hands. But it is still difficult."

"So the spirits talked to you." This wasn't a question Cloud Dancing asked.

Sully bowed his head slightly, shuffled his shoes in the soil and took a deep breath:"I'll build a lean- to in the woods where I can sleep. I wanna live on my own for a while. I'm not ready for my daughter yet. I still don't believe I'm good for her, she deserves better..."

"She deserves her father, my friend." Cloud Dancing carefully watched him.

"Maybe, but…" Sully's voice trailed off.

The Indian suddenly slapped his back. "What do you say, will we see the others?"

In the village word has spread fast about their white friend's return. Most of the tribe's members were already gathered around the central fireplace. They all eagerly awaited to hear about his journey. But Sully searched for one special face. When he finally saw it he stepped to her.

"Ha ho, Flying Sun." He softly smiled but then his face grew serious again. He reached in his pocket and handed her the dreamcatcher. He swallowed dryly when he saw her face clouding over . "It helped. Thank you." He searched her eyes for comprehension. The young woman nodded and fumbled for his beadstring that hung with others around her neck. Sully put his hand over hers to stop her. "No, you keep it. I'm still your friend." Flying Sun nodded again. It ached him to watch how her eyes saddened but he wasn't ready for a woman yet. He didn't know if he ever would be again. He didn't even want to think about it. When he turned away she thoughtfully fingered the small object he had given her back. She didn´t want to be his friend. She wanted more.

Michaela sat behind her desk and read the latest medical journal. Hannah took a nap in her old room which was now a recovery room as well. Yesterday a troop of soldiers had arrived in town. They had built their tents in the meadow. Nobody knew what this was all about. Michaela was concerned. Suddenly there wasa knock on the clinic door that startled her from her reverie.

"Come in!" she shouted and looked expectantly at the door. An army sergeant stepped in.

"Excuse me, ma'am, I want to speak to Dr. Quinn."

"I'm the doctor." As it was to be expected he gave her a surprised look.

"I'm Sergeant McKay, ma'am. I've got order to talk to you about the reservation. Dr. Cassidy from Denver was responsible so far but he said he has a practice to run and now that you are here…" He kneaded is cap in his hands and watched her uneasily.

Michaela rose from her chair. "What would I have to do?"

"Well, the main thing would be to find out if there are any infectious diseases which could effect the settlers or even the town. You'd have to go only once or twice a year because we kept the reservations far enough from towns."

Michaela contemplated it. Since she was here at the frontier she actually hadn't met any Indians yet. She only remembered seeing some of them on her journey on the stagecoach when she had arrived in Colorado Springs.

"I don't believe the Indians could be a threat for the town. Isn't it rather the other way and the white man is a danger for them?" She didn't give him the opportunity to answer her rhetorical question. "Well, I have no more appointments today and it is still early…I will leave after lunch." She already hadmade up her mind.

" So it's settled?" Sergeant McKay was relieved. "I could send two soldiersto guard you."

"I don't think that's a good idea. I will Matthew ask to come with me. I think he even knows the way. "

Michaela was expectant as well as nervous. She stood on the edge of the Indian village, Matthew by her side. "What are you waiting for? We should go and search for their medicine man", the young man didn't understand why she had stopped. She wouldn't have second thoughts now, would she?

"Matthew, if I visit you at home I first knock and then I wait for the call to come in although your mother is my friend. We are strangers here, they may even consider us intruders. I don't want a bad start." Matthew looked surprised he hadn't seen it this way.

Meanwhile the elderly Cheyenne had been informed about their presence. Cloud Dancing observed them keenly. He knew the young man, he had met him with a hunting party once. But he didn't know the woman. He would see what it was about her being here. He sent two boys to fetch them and awaited their arrival at the central fireplace.

While they crossed the Indian village Michaela was fully aware of the looks and the whispering. Like anytime when she had to appear stronger than she felt she straightened up some more. Finally they reached a fireplace where three Cheyenne stood with inscrutable faces. Suddenly it occurred to Michaela that she didn't know if they even could communicate at all because she didn't know the Indians' language. She decided to try it and took one other step toward them. Slightly bowing her head she introduced herself, "I'm Doctor Quinn and this is Matthew Cooper ", she pointed at him. "He showed me the way."

Now one of the men took a step toward her, too. He was tall with long black hair hanging over his shoulders and he wore several necklaces -made with beads and feathers.

"You are the doctor from the government?" he asked.

"Well, I'm the doctor in Colorado Springs and they asked me…" She couldn't finish her sentence. "We dont need no doctor, we have all we need", he curtly interrupted her. Normally Michaela would have reacted at this immediately but she was distracted. She had spotted a wolf only five foot away! He laid by the fire, his head on his outstreched front paws and he blinked at her. She couldn't hide her surprise and some fear. "There is a wolf- !" was all she could say. Now the Indian showed the first slight emotion. Somewhat amused he explained, "Don't worry. He means no harm. He is my brother's wolf. He has a wound on his left back leg so he must stay in camp today."

Hearing the word "wound" Michaela immediately knelt down to the animal. She patted his head and caressed the thick fur. "Would you like to show me this leg?" Michaela spoke in a low tone. Again she was interrupted by the Indian. He reached for her arm and tried to stop her, "I already took care of him." Michaela looked back at him. "Like I said, I'm a doctor, it won't hurt if I take a look." Now Matthew spoke for the first time:" Ahem, Dr. Mike? Dr. Mike, this is Cloud Dancing, the medicine man."

"Oh!" Instantly she rose again and pulled out her hand to him. "It's a pleasure meeting you. Like I said, I'm Doctor Michaela Quinn." She gave the medicine man one of her wide smiles. Cloud Dancing could see that she was truly pleased so he took her hand though still hesitantly and shook it. But then he started again,"You don't need to…" This time _he_ was interrupted.

"Is it because I'm a woman ?" She looked challenging in his dark brown eyes.

"No, but you are a white…" again he couldn't finish.

"Isn't it the same ? In my world I am rejected because I'm a woman and in your world because I am white! Why do you refuse even to let me see if I could help?" With every word the fire in her eyes had increased. Cloud Dancing pensively regarded her. "My people lived without the white man's medicine for centuries. We didn't need it then and we don't need it now." His face was still stern but his voice had softened.

Michaela passionately replied: "But that's where you are wrong. The white man is here now , he already has affected your life not only by taking your land but also by bringing his diseases. I know the medicine for these so I can help. And even if it isn't about one of the new disaeses I might have some new medicines for the old ones, too." She looked around suddenly aware that they had many attentive listeners. Directing her gaze back to Cloud Dancing she tried again: "I want to help. Please, let me help you."

"You say I should accept your medicine. How about you accepting mine?" The medicine man wasn't convinced yet. But now he received an even wider smile from her than before: "I would be honored to learn from you. I always keep an open mind." She pointed with her head at the wolf again. "May I take a look at him?" She patiently waited for his answer. Cloud Dancing could feel her strong will and he saw the kindness in her eyes. "Another doctor will not hurt," he sincerely spoke, a slight smile crossing his face.

Michaela had sent Matthew back to town. He would bring Hannah to the homestead in a couple of hours and so she would have one of the very rare moments of time for herself.

She had a favourite place on the bank at the nearby creek. When she arrived there she tethered her horse on a branch and sat down on a fallen log. Although it was already fall the sun was still powerful. She leaned back closing her eyes and directed her face to the sky so the sun could warm it. Only hearing the murmur of the creek, the chirping of birds and the rustle of the leaves in a slight breeze she felt at peace with the surrounding nature.

She didn't notice the man emerging between the trees behind her. She didn't notice when he stopped in his tracks at the moment he saw her. She didn't notice how he watched her with his blue eyes, mesmerized.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 4 

Sully had roamed through the woods all day long. The restlessness inside of him had been increasing since the day he had returned from his vision quest. He knew it was about his daughter. Cloud Dancing was right, Hannah needed her father. He was sure Loren and Maude had done their best but they didn't get any younger. His excursions had led him closer to town lately. It was as if an invisible power drew him there. Yesterday he had almost taken a look at his homestead but at the last moment he had recoiled from this intention.

He needed to talk to Cloud Dancing again. So he changed his mind about going to his lean-to and took the other direction to get to the reservation. When he neared the creek he slowed down for a reason he didn't know yet. Suddenly his eyes caught the sight of a piece of blue which didn't come from the sky. He tentatively stepped forward and then he saw her. He was immediately frozen in place. There sat a woman on a log! She was leaning back to let the sun caress her face. He could only see her long brown hair that hung down like a shiny curtain and nearly reached the ground. She wore a blue skirt. She didn't move. He stood there and watched her mesmerized at least a minute. Maybe she wasn't real and he only had a vision. But why should he? When he finally tried to get a better look he wasn't carefully enough. A twig snapped under his moccasin which made her startle and turn around to search for the reason of this sound. He quickly stepped behind a trunk so she couldn't spot him. But he could see her face now. He'd never seen such a beautiful woman before. When he was a little boy his mother had taken him to a big church in New York to show him the picture of an angel. This lovely creature seemed to be one. But after another moment he regained his composure and shook his head. That was crazy! Of course there weren't things such as angels. He turned and walked on to reach his destination.

In the Indian village Cloud Dancing informed Black Kettle about the visit of the doctor. They stood in front of the chief's teepee, Snowbird and Flying Sun sitting at a nearby fire. The men spoke in Cheyenne. The medicine man emphasized his words with firm gestures. " I believe we can trust her. I have seen how she touched the animal when she disinfected the wound and bandaged it. Then she had heard Little Blackbird's cough and had immediately gone to her and examined her. Her fingers were gentle and her eyes full of compassion. She is a highly gifted doctor, I could see it. She does not judge who the patient is. She only sees a creature needing help." When they had heard Little Blackbirds name both women rose and stepped to the men. Noticing this Cloud Dancing asked his wife, "What is it ?" Snowbird hesitantly informed him. "Flying Sun wants to know if the doctor could say what is wrong with her sister."

The older man comfortingly laid his hand on the young woman's shoulder. "She is sure it is consumption. I'm very sorry. All we can do is to give her good food. And she must rest a lot."

"She will not heal?" He shrugged. "If she is lucky enough…" Flying Sun was devastated.

"So I can do nothing?" She asked with despair in her voice. Cloud Dancing turned to Black Kettle again. "Dr. Mike said she will come the day after tomorrow again. She will bring some medicine she has to order first. And if we approve it she will examine first all children and then the adults as well." The chief contemplated it. "You are sure about her?" The medicine man nodded. "I am". Before anyone else could speak again some welcome greetings could be heard and then Sully approached his brother. They smiled at each other and met in a short embrace. "What brings you out here, my friend?" the Cheyenne asked him. "I wanna talk to you if you have the time." Now Sully gave the others a nod. When he noticed his wolf and the dazzling white bandage on his leg he was puzzled. "Where does it come from?"

The Indian smiled. "The white man has sent a new doctor." Sully was incredulous. "And he cared for a wolf?" Snowbird started to explain. "Dr. Mike is…" but she couldn't finish. She saw something that made her stop in the middle of her sentence. Her husband had slightly lifted his hand and now she actually detected a hint of mischief in his eyes. She gaped at him and then a faint smile crossed her face. Obviousely he wanted his friend to experience the surprise by himself. He now explained to Sully, "You will meet Dr. Mike here the day after tomorrow if you want it." But Sully had already lost his interest in someone who was sent here by the government. "Can I talk to you?" he asked his friend with urgency.

Sully started to speak as soon as the camp laid behind them. "Cloud Dancing, I know I gotta do something about my daughter I only don't know where to begin. Taking her to the lean-to is out of the question. I thought about living with her in the homestead but I don't know if I can bear that…that's where her mother died…my Abby… and I don't know if I…" his voice trailed off but his friend remained silent. Taking a deep breath Sully continued. "I thought maybe I could live with her in your camp, you are my family now. And I'm sure the women would help especially Flying Sun although … it wouldn't be fair to her…I told her I could only be her friend …" Again he didn't finish but now Cloud Dancing spoke. "Has it occurred to you that your daughter already has a life? She isn't a baby anymore. She has people she loves and is loved by. She will not understand why you take all that away from her." Sully heatedly interfered: "But I'm her father! I should be with her!" The Indian nodded. "That's right. You must take responsibility. But do you really believe living with my family would be right for her? If she lives with us she will starve like the other children." Sully assured: "I'll ensure that she has enough to eat!" Now the medicine man stopped in his tracks. He looked at the white man on his side. "Do you really believe the Cheyenne fathers _let_ their children starve? They do all they can to get enough food but it never is enough. If your child lives with us she will share the hunger, too." Sully hadn't seen it this way. "What am I gonna do?" He looked helplessly at his brother. Cloud Dancing smiled. "First you should get to know her and then you can make decisions." The relief Sully felt was almost palpable. Cloud Dancing was right. There were already people in Hannah's life and if they loved her they would help him. When he thought about Loren and Maude in this matter he even was sure about that.

For a while they walked in silence. The medicine man sensed that there was something else that troubled his friend. "You can tell me, you know that." The younger man cleared his throat. "Well, it is something I've seen today. Or somebody, I don't know exactly." The questioning look from his friend urged him on. "I'm not sure if she was real or if I had a vision…" Cloud Dancing was curious now. "You better explain." Sully shrugged. "Well, when I was on my way to the reservation I saw a woman. She was sitting on a log… had long brown hair...the most beautiful long brown hair I've ever seen. Then she turned and she looked…stunning. She didn't seem to be real…"

The older man knew exactly whom he talked about. "You've been away from town a long time now. Maybe there are some new citizens?" He could barely hide his amusement.

Sully didn't notice because he contemplated what his friend had said. "I wanted to go to town soon anyway, looking for Hannah. Seeing what's new…" Suddenly he liked the idea of visiting the town very much. He could go tomorrow…

Shortly after noon the next day he finally had managed to ride into town. Much to his relief the streets were empty. He dismounted his horse, went to the mercantile and knocked. Nothing. Unsure what to do next he looked around. He had counted on Loren and Maude being there. Maybe he should ask Charlotte. He went down the deserted street to look for somebody in the boarding house. When he stepped on the porch to knock on Charlotte's door he first noticed a very small shiny shingle which said "Dr. M. Quinn, MD". So the doctor lived here, too."Found your way back, Sully?" The deep slightly drunken voice came from across the street. Sully jumped and turned. "Hank!" He tried to calm his heartbeat by taking a deep breath and then exhaling very slowly. "You know where Loren is?" Hank nodded slowly. "Went to Denver today…You came for your child?" Sully nodded. "The doc will not be pleased I bet." Hank smirked. "What has the doctor to do with my…" At this moment the door flew open and Brian ran into Sully. The boy looked up to see who had stopped him and after only a short moment he cried for his mother. "Ma, ma come quick! Sully is back!" and with this he threw his arms around Sully's waist to hug him tightly. Now Charlotte emerged wiping her hands on a towel. "Sully, is it really you? You look different with your long hair and those buckskin trousers… I can't believe it!" Sully guiltily bent his head and raffled Brians hair. "I should've been here sooner… though I couldn't...I was hoping you would understand…" Charlotte assured him: "We tried, Sully and we did." Suddenly he didn't want to waste anymore time. "Where is Hannah?" Now Brian couldn't hold on any longer . "She lives with Dr. Mike now –" Sully interrupted. "Why? Is she sick?" Brian tried to answer again but his mother silenced him. "She's not sick, Sully. But Maude hasn't been doing well for a long time now and so they asked Dr. Mike to take care of Hannah." Sully stepped forward and searched the hallway with his eyes. "So she lives here now?" Charlotte shook her head. She knew that now would come the difficult part. "Loren and Maude wanted them to live at the homestaed, they've been living there for half a year now." Sully couldn't believe it. "Loren gave my house to a stranger?" He felt his temper rise. Charlotte carefully answered, "Well, Dr. Mike isn't exactly a stranger and…" Sully lifted his hand to stop her. "I've heard enough. I gotta go." With this he mounted his horse and rode off to get to his homestead.

On his way to his old home Sully kept urging his horse to go faster. He wasn't willing to believe it. How could Loren give his daughter to a stranger and on top of it his house, too! And now he remembered the look in Cloud Dancing's eyes when he spoke about the doctor. He'd thought he'd detected something akin to admiration there. And this man had Hannah! But she was his child, wasn't she? When he approached the homestead he dismounted and did what he had learned – he moved soundless and so did his Indian pony.

Then he saw it again. He would never forget this hair! She stood with her back to him hanging up laundry on the clothesline. He could hear her softly humming. She hadn't noticed him yet. Obviously she was the doctor's wife. He felt renewed anger wash over him. So this man had his house, his daughter _and _this woman! "You better tell your husband I want my daughter and my house back!" he harshly blurted out. Frightened to death Michaela flew around.

And now the world stood still for three or four seconds. They stared at each other and their gazes fell right in the other ones soul.

She was the first who could move again. Overwhelmed she stammered, "I beg your pardon?" Now he found his voice too. "You heard me perfectly well. Where is Hannah?" She pointed to the house still not able for coherent thoughts. "Inside, taking a nap. But…" Sully was at the door with her last word. He stepped in, taking in the room for the first time after so many months. His look fell on his old bed where his wife had died and the thought of another man with _her _in this bed infuriated him beyond any words. He searched the room for his child and when he saw her he didn't even take the time to view her features. Though when he took her in his arms he did it tenderly even without waking her. He stepped out brushing the woman who had arrived at the door by now and informed her matter-of-factly, "I'll take her to _my_ family." Michaela still couldn't react. Only after he had mounted his horse she was able to speak again. "You can't come here and just take her. At least we should-" he didn't let her finish. "I can do it and I did it." With that he turned his horse around the child now stirring. The little girl opened her eyes and gazed straight into the eyes she knew from her looks in her little mirror. Though she was puzzled she wasn't disturbed and went back to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5 

Michaela stood in the yard, stunned and left behind like a wagon that had done its work, no longer needed because there was a better one now. All she could think was, "Her father! Her father is back!" Suddenly she felt the loss running through her veins like icy water. Her legs became unsteady and a wave of nausea engulfed her. She squatted down and wrapped her arms around her knees. She desperately tried to calm down so she could breathe again. Her heart pounded wildly. She attempted to control her body but without result because now her thoughts flew to the little girl. She would wake up and be alone with a stranger! She would be terrified! What could she do? The next thing that crossed her mind was that she had to tell Loren and Maude. And now guilt flooded her. How could she had let this happen! She had done nothing to hold him back! Oh my god, what had she done! Trembling in every limb she slowly rose. She had to go to town.

She arrived in town at the same moment the stagecoach did. After tethering her horse to the post at the clinic she turned to the passengers which were getting off, spotting Loren and Maude among them. Hank who had seen her arriving and noticed the pale face and shaking hands sensed something had happened. He welcomed the diversion and eagerly followed her. Bowing to the inevitable Michaela approached the grandparents. Maude was pleased. "Hello Dr. Mike, it's good to see you! Where is Hannah?" But now the older woman saw the terror on the doctor's face. "Dr. Mike?" she anxiously asked. Michaela tried to swallow the lump in her throat. "Her father came and took her."

Loren unbelievingly stared at her. "He what!" he exclaimed and with that getting the attention of other people. In a small voice she told them. "He came to the homestead half an hour ago and told me he would take her to _his_ family. I'm so sorry I didn't stop him. It happened so fast, he was gone before I could make any move." She stepped to Maude and squeezed her hands. "I'm so sorry." Maude tried to grasp it. "But Sully would never do that. How did you know it was him?" Michaela only whispered. "He told me so. He had her blue eyes." She started to tremble again. At this point Hank joined in. "It was him. He came here first and asked for you." Loren's face was red by now. "How dare he! He has no right! We should form a search party and get her back where she belongs. Who's coming with me?" He looked around for some willing men in the crowd. "Hold on, Loren. He is her father and the law says he has the right to take her." It was Jake.

Now Loren completely lost his temper. "Have you seen him around here the last one and a half year? I tell you he's lost every right!" Suddenly his wife grasped for his arm. "Loren, please, calm down, there must be a way…" Her face drained all colour and she couldn't stand any longer. Michaela immediately reacted. "Get her to the clinic. Hurry!"

When the doctor stepped out on the clinic porch again a crowd was still there. Searching for Loren with her eyes she noticed some of the men were wearing rifles now. She was alarmed but first she had to talk to Loren. She saw him coming from the direction of the mercantile wearing a rifle, too. "Loren, shouldn't you take care of your wife? She is resting comfortably and I believe you can take her home in the evening." Loren smiled relieved. "Alright, so we can go after my little girl now." The men nodded in agreement.

"What do you want with all these guns?" Michaela was deeply concerned by now. "Aw, Dr. Mike, we have to find a kidnapper. If he stole a child he is dangerous. We want to start right now, so can you tell us what he said where his family lives?" She tried to reason with the furious man. "Loren, listen to me. If you will use your guns you might hurt Hannah. You don't want that, do you? And no, he didn't say anything about his family, only that he would take her there." Now Hank interfered. "Maybe he is an Injun now, he sure looked like one of them!" The saloonkeeper smirked, satisfied with the reaction he gained – they talked all at once. One man shouted, "Why don't we ask the army, they are still here!" His suggestion met with universal approval. But Michaela knew she couldn't let this happen. "Wait a minute! I was at the reservation yesterday but I didn't see him there. Please, if you all want the best for Hannah let me speak with them. I have an appointment tomorrow morning and I can ask their medicine man if he knows anything. If you send the army or go by yourself with those guns Hannah could be shot too if she really is there."

Loren watched her closely. He knew this woman loved the girl like her own. Maybe she was right. He didn't want anything to happen to his granddaughter. Out loud he spoke, "But if you return and don't bring her back we will go there and fetch her. Alright men, we'll wait for Dr. Mike." After some protests all went back to their own businesses. A relieved Michaela returned to her patient.

Sully carefully rode with the precious bundle in his arms though his heart was still pounding at full speed. Since he had been able to think again he tried to understand what he had done. It wasn't supposed to have gone this way! He had agreed when Cloud Dancing told him he should first get to know his daughter and then make plans how to live with her. And now he had yelled at a woman he didn't even know and had taken the child as if it was a thing he just wanted to own! He looked down at the little girl who was stirring again. Fortunately he was just arriving at his lean-to. He dismounted his horse and placed the toddler on one of the soft furs laying there. Hannah looked at the stranger in bewilderment. Although she was used to see people she didn't know every day there always was at least one face she recognized. Sometimes it was Colleen, more often grandpa and grandma but most of the time it was Dr. Mike. Dr. Mike! Suddenly fully awake she looked around. All she could make out were trees, grass and a man she hadn't seen before. She started to be afraid. "Mi?… Mi?" When there was no response she grew more frightened . "Mi!…Mi!" The stranger caressed her head and told her,"Sh, sh, you don't have to worry. I'm your pa. I'm here now. Nothing will happen to you!" But for the little girl the word pa had no meaning so it gave her no comfort. "Mi!" She was crying now. Her little body began to shake with fear. Sully didn't know what to do. He felt like he had during the first three days of her life. Hannah was weeping, the little thumb of the left hand in her mouth. She didn't listen to him. He sat down and took her on his lap. He tried to rock her to calm her down but it didn't work. He knew he needed help. Holding the girl tightly against his chest he mounted his pony again to ride out to the reservation.

When he arrived there he only found the women. Snowbird watched him with astonishment when he approached her. "Is this your child?" Sully cleared his throat. "May I introduce you to Hannah Sully?" Snowbird smiled at the frightened girl and carefully caressed her long and soft blond locks. "Where is Cloud Dancing?" Sully asked with urgency. Snowbird was still admiring the girl. "She is so beautiful. You must be proud of her. What happened? She is so sad." Sully repeated, "Snowbird, where is Cloud Dancing?" While she tried to take the child in her arms she answered, "The men are out hunting. They will be back tomorrow morning. What happened, Sully?" Hannah was looking around with wide eyes. She still couldn't spot anything familiar so she decided to stay with the stranger who held her securely. She shook her head when the woman reached for her. She would stay with the man and wait for Dr. Mike. With all she possessed she knew Dr. Mike would come to bring her back home. "I'm not proud of what I've done but I couldn't let her stay with this man. I'd rather not speak about it. But I'll need your help for tonight." Sully knew he had messed things up hopelessly and he wanted his brother's advice.

It had been a very long night. Hannah had become withdrawn, she didn't eat, she didn't want to be hold by any other person and she only slept when exhaustion took over. Occasionally the little body was shaken by dry sobs. Only one time, shortly after he had laid her down for sleep, she had asked him, "Bun?", but he hadn't known what she meant. He had thought the whole night about what he should do now but without result. He knew his pride didn't allow him to ask this doctor for help. After Hannah woke up he took her in his arms again and went to the medicin man's teepee. Snowbird had promised she would try to give Hannah some mash the Cheyenne used for their own children. When he entered he saw Flying Sun sitting there, too. Both women were smiling at him. "Good morning! I hope she will eat today." With that he sat the toddler down. The child didn't react, she only sucked her thumb again. But suddenly she became alert. She lifted the little head and listened carefully. She knew that sound! Dr. Mikes wagon! Now nothing could hold her back. She rose to her unsteady feet and scampered away from the strangers. All she wanted was to get out to Dr. Mike.

Michaela hadn't slept very much, too. Alternating between fear for the child she had allowed to be taken from her and feelings of guilt she had tried to figure out what to do next. Hank was right. Mr. Sully's clothes had let her come to the same conclusion that he might live with the Indians. She would ask the Cheyenne medicine man for help. As a precaution she even had brought the stuffed bunny the girl needed for a peaceful sleep. Deep in thoughts she hadn't paid attention to her surroundings and was now noticing that she already was in the middle of the Indian village. She stopped the horse and hopped down from the wagon. And then she saw her. Hannah was here! The two of them rushed towards each other and met in a very tight embrace. The little girl clung to Michaela's neck sobbing "Mi!…Mi!" and an overjoyed Michaela spoke with soothing words."It's alright, sweetheart, it's alright. I'm here now." She rubbed the toddlers back to calm her down. "Shhh, it's alright. I'm staying with you. I promise. I'm here now." When she rose with the child still clinging on her her eyes met the blue ones of the man who had frightened her to death yesterday. Instantly her expression changed. She was seized with pure anger now though she knew she had to stay calm for Hannah's sake. "I'll talk to you later," she said, trying not to yell at him and turned again to reassure the girl further. But Sully reached for his daughter."What do you have in mind, this is my child!" Michaela backed away. "Unfortunately this is true. But if you were a caring father you would see that she needs _me_ at this moment!" Her eyes shot him an ireful look. The Indian women had watched this scene in amazement. Flying Sun couldn't believe how this woman spoke to a man and refused to give him his own child. She stepped forward and reached for the girl. "I take!" But Michaela stepped back even further. Hannah tightened her grasp around Dr. Mikes neck, buried her face in her shoulder and whimpered: "No! Mi!" Sully first was surprised and then angered about Flying Sun's interfering. He laid his hand on her arm and curtly told her: "Stop it!"

Seeing the hurt on the woman's face and assuming she was a part of Mr. Sully's family Michaela tried to explain, "Like I told Cloud Dancing yesterday I think Little Blackbird who lives in your teepee may have consumption and I still don't know if it is infectious. Under these circumstances I can't allow that Hannah stays with you, at least not now." While she was speaking Snowbird translated and Flying Sun nodded. Now she understood.

During this talk nobody had noticed Sully's reaction. His face had drained all colour and then he stammered: "_You _are the doctor?" Michaela flashed him another angry look. "Yes, I am. If you had had the politeness to introduce yourself as any civilized human being would have done yesterday I could have told you!" Sully bent down his head, blushing now. "I'm sorry," was all he replied. But Michaela wasn't finished with him. "That's the least you should be!"

Fortunately he was rescued by the Indian men who rode into the village coming back from their hunt.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 6 

They hadn't been very successful, a deer and some rabbits wouldn't last for the whole village. Cloud Dancing was worried. Then he spotted the group with the woman doctor, his brother and his wife. Coming closer he noticed a little girl clinging on Dr. Mikes neck. He could tell she didn't belong to his tribe. The look on Sully's face told him it had to be his daughter and that something was wrong. He dismounted his horse and joined the group. "Ha ho, my friend." He addressed his brother then he nodded to his wife. "It's good to see you." He shortly caressed her arm. When he turned to the doctor he carefully viewed her and the girl.

"You are raising the child?" Michaela nodded. "I am." The Cheyenne smiled at her. "Then she is lucky." The woman blushed. "I'm afraid Mr. Sully doesn't see it this way. He insists that she lives here with his family. But I believe there are some reasons why I can't allow that right now." Cloud Dancing frowned and turned to his friend. "You don't want her in your daughter's life?" But when he saw the expression of embarressment on the younger man's face he recognized Sully had done something he deeply regretted. Cloud Dancing smiled and suggested, "You should talk."

Still too angry with Hannah's father to speak reasonably she told them, "I think first a little nap is in order," and she pointed with her eyes to an almost sleeping girl on her shoulder. But the child was suddenly wide-eyed and her gaze was directed at the animal next to the stranger's feet. Nobody had noticed its arrival, even Sully saw it only now. He bent down to his companion and scratched him behind the ears. Michaela explained to the child, "This is a wolf, sweetheart. Wolf. Try it!" and she smiled encouragingly at Hannah. "Wo," the girl tried. "That's right, a wolf. He is very friendly I've already met him the day before yesterday." Sully thought he could finally do something good for his daughter. "Do you want to pet him? He would like that." Hannah instantly tightened her grasp around Michaela's neck again, looking away from the stranger. Though Michaela was wishing she didn't have to do this she tried to mediate. She bent her head back to look in the little face. "We could do it together. What do you think?" Suggestively she raised her eyebrows. Now Sully saw the first smile on his daughter's face. Michaela shortly looked at him searching for his permission. "Sure, he'd like that," he nodded.

Michaela squatted down and carefully placed the girl on the ground. Hannah tentatively touched the thick fur. Her smile broadened and without a warning she threw her little arms around the wolf's neck. "Wo!" she exclaimed. The wolf didn't move. He patiently put up with the attention. Michaela spoke to Hannah but glanced at Sully when she suggested, "Maybe he could help you taking a little nap. I even brought bunny for you."

For the first time since she woke up with the stranger yesterday Hannah thought all would be alright again. Dr. Mike was here, and she had known she would come to her, and now her bunny too and she had gained a new friend. When she had leaned into the wolf she had felt he did the same with her. With Dr. Mike, bunny and the wolf near she knew she would like to rest a little bit and then finally go home. So she nodded her head, propping her thumb in her mouth and mumbled, "Bun."

Michaela took the girl in her arms again and carried her towards the wagon. The right corner next to the driver's seat was always prepared for Hannah with blankets and a little pillow. Sully ordered Wolf with a gesture to follow the two women. He knew they would be the most important persons in his future life though he didn't even know if they lived alone and if they could forgive him for what he had done to them.

Sergeant McKay tried to make a decision. In the morning he had been informed about an Indian who had kidnapped the girl the woman doctor was raising. Some of his soldiers had heard it at the saloon. They also reported that some of the men from town considered going to the Indian village to rescue her. He knew he couldn't allow that but he also didn't want to go with his soldiers and start new fights. But he also couldn't ignore it. More information would be good and so he started walking to town. When he crossed the bridge he saw some men wearing rifles debating in front of the saloon. He went faster and when he reached the crowd he heard the bartender growl, "I don't care what this darn woman says. We are the men and I tell you we are going there and bring the girl back!" These words were met with approval. McKay knew he had to act fast now. "Hold on, men. It's not your business to take care of such matters. I want to know what happened and then I will tell you what should be done…" He couldn't finish because suddenly desperate screams were heard.

"Help! I need help! Dr. Mike!" Everybody turned towards the mercantile. Loren came running from there waving with both arms. "Hurry! It's Maude! Where is Dr. Mike? I need her!" Charlotte came rushing out her door, the children by her side. "She's not back yet. She's still out at the reservation." Hearing this Hank gave his opinion again, "That's it. Let's go, men. We fetch the doc and the girl right away!" But McKay lifted his arm, "Stop! Don't be stupid! If you go into the reservation just like that you will get shot before you even know it! I'll take some of the soldiers and go."

To everybody's surprise Matthew interfered, "I'll go. I was there, they've seen me already and no one has to shoot. Remember, Dr. Mike is there and maybe Hannah, too." Speaking this he stepped to his horse and untethered it from the clinic post. Before anyone could argue Loren told the young man, "Hurry! Tell her Maude fainted. She has to come quick!" Matthew only nodded and rode towards the woods.

At the reservation Sully couldn't stop watching the woman who took care of his daughter so tenderly and sincerely as if they had spent all their lives together. He heard her softly humming a lullaby and saw how she caressed the toddler's head. Her smile took his breath away and he was wondering how he could ever look her in the eyes without shame again.

While he was observing the white woman Snowbird and Flying Sun watched him. Both knew what was going on but each of them had different feelings about this. Snowbird was pleased, all she had ever hoped for was him finding happiness in his life again. Although she didn't know anything about Dr. Mike and wether she would respond to the obvious feelings of her husband's brother or not she knew he had begun to feel again and that was the important thing. Flying Sun was far away from being pleased. It should have been her who put that interest back in his eyes. She still believed she could offer him all the love he needed. A few minutes ago the doctor had spoken to her with respect. She hoped Sully had noticed that and he could see her in a new light. She wouldn't give up that easily.

Michaela sighed with relief after Hannah finally had fallen asleep. She carefully dismounted the wagon and looked out for Cloud Dancing. She had to tell him that she couldn't stay as long as she had intented to. But first her eyes met Mr. Sully's. She didn't know what to make of him. Yesterday he had frightened her, a few minutes ago he had tried again to take Hannah from her and now he stood there and seemed to be…shy. She knew they had to talk but now wasn't the time.

When the medicine man came back to her she told him, "Cloud Dancing, I'm afraid I have to tell you that I can't examine your children today." She saw a shadow fly over his face. "It's not what you think. I'll come back for this later, I promise. It is about Hannah and the townsfolk. I had to tell them yesterday that her father had taken her away without saying where he would go. He only told me he would take her to his family. Unfortunately Hank came to the conclusion, as to Mr. Sully's clothes, that he might have brought her in your village and they wanted to come here instantly with their rifles. They even considered asking the army for help." Alarmed the Indian looked for his men. "I made them promise to wait for me and the information I hoped you could give me. I didn't know Hannah was here. So I think it's best I go back to town as fast as possible to show them there is no need for guns. And I have to see after Maude, the girl's grandmother. She suffered a heart attack hearing the news." While the white woman explained the situation to him Cloud Dancing gave his friend an unbelieving look. Sully now was consumed with feelings of shame and guilt hearing all of the mess he had caused. He stared at the ground, uncomfortably shuffling his feet. The medicine man nodded in understanding, "Of course you should go back. We will see you another time." Michaela smiled at him. "I brought you something for Little Blackbird." She turned back to the wagon and lifted a can and a bag down. "It's milk and rolled oats so you can make her porridge." The Indian instantly stepped back. "I can't take this. We don't need no charity." But he hadn't known Michaela yet. "Of course you can take it. Why don't you see it as a medicine? In her state Little Blackbird needs all the good food she can get. It will help her staying strong." She could see that the medicine man still wasn't convinced. "The milk is from my own cow. Loren gave it to me so I would always have milk for Hannah. But even if I help her drinking the both of us still have too much. So I give Charlotte milk for her children. As an equivalent Matthew helps me with the animals and Colleen often watches Hannah. And _you_ said you would teach me about your medicine, so it would be the same. You take the food and I can learn from you." She waited for his reaction. Cloud Dancing thought he shouldn't be surprised. Yesterday he had told Black Kettle he was convinced that she was a good doctor. He knew as a doctor one didn't only need skills in medicine but a strong will, too. He acknowledged this quality in her. So he finally gave his permission with a nod.

Snowbird had been standing with them all the time. When Dr. Mike had offered the food she had silently implored the spirits for help. She knew her husband's pride and she understood why he didn't want such a gift but she also knew they desperately needed it. Before Cloud Dancing could think otherwise she stepped to Michaela. She took the can and the bag from her. "Thank you, Dr. Mike. The mothers will use your medicine." She glanced at Cloud Dancing and gave him a thankful smile.

Before they could talk to each other again some Indians brought Matthew on his horse to them. Matthew was relieved to see the town's doctor and he spoke with urgency, "Dr. Mike, you must come quickly. It's Maude. She fainted. And I don't know how long the men will still wait, they're eager to come out here." Michaela instantly moved to the wagon to mount it but she stopped in the middle of her move. "Hannah is sleeping in the back, I don't know…" Without hesitation Sully stepped to her. "You go sit with her, I'll drive." She knew there was no time for arguing so she climbed the back of the wagon while he entered the driver's seat. They drove out of the Indian village with full speed.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 7 

They hadn't even left the village when Hannah awoke with a start because of the rattling of the wagon. Before she could be frightened again Michaela took her on her lap, one hand protectively holding against the girl's stomach and pressing her to her own. With the other hand she grasped the side-shelf of the wagon to keep the both of them steadily. She wished she had taken Matthew's horse to reach the town faster but she also knew she couldn't let Hannah be without her at the moment. Her worried thoughts went to Maude. She prayed to God it wouldn't be too late. Although there had been only minor attacks in the last few weeks it concerned her that they came more frequently. And if she even fainted this time…She took a deep breath and knew she had to wait until they were in town. She looked down and pressed a kiss on the fair head of the child that meant the world to her. She didn't dare to think about what Mr. Sully could have in his mind about Hannah. So she brushed the thought off for the moment. She would deal with it later.

Sully glanced over his shoulder to see if everything was alright in the back and suddenly he was aware of the fact that he drove his own wagon. He swallowed dry and momentarily shut his eyes. It shouldn't have been this way. When he went to town a couple of days ago he had only wanted to tell Loren and Maude that he was here now, that he was ready to take his responsibilities. And what was the outcome? They had to race to Maude because he had given her a heart attack. He only hoped Dr. Mike was as good as Cloud Dancing seemed to believe. If anything happened to Maude…he didn't know if he could live with any more guilt. And he couldn't believe what he had done to his daughter. All he ever wanted was to love her and now he had frightened her so much he only hoped he would be able to repair the damage some day. And what about the woman doctor? Would she ever forgive him? He wanted to show her he wasn't the man she met in the yard at the homestead. But he had acted like he did, didn't he? What was wrong with him? Again he glanced over his shoulder. They seemed to be alright.

They were close to the town now and when the wagon left the woods he could see the crowd in the street. His heartbeat accelerated. He had to face this now. He knew he would.

When the wagon arrived at the clinic Michaela had to deal with several questions at the same time. Before she climbed down she gave Hannah in Charlotte's care and answered her first, "She is alright, please bring her to my old room and stay with her." The older woman nodded and went inside, Colleen in tow. Hopping down the doctor replied to Sergeant McKay, "There is no need for you to go out to the reservation. This has nothing to do with the Indians." The soldier was relieved and ordered his men, "Back to camp!" So now only the townspeople were left. In the meantime Michaela stood on the ground, grasping for her bag and told Loren, "I'll do my best. Where is she?" and opened the clinic door. But before she stepped in she turned back and looked out for one certain person. "Will you be here when I'm ready, Mr. Sully?" He only nodded.

When she entered the recovery room Loren was right behind her. Grace rose from the chair next to the bed and whispered, "She asked for Hannah." Michaela smiled, "That's a good sign waking up by herself. Now Loren, would you go next door please, I'm sure Hannah is eager to see her grandpa. As soon as I know something I will tell you." She raised her eyebrows at him. "Aw, alright Dr. Mike, but…" Michaela smiled, "I assure you you will be the first to know. Now go, please." She turned her attention back to Maude.

After visiting his grandchild which finally had fallen asleep after several tight hugs Loren stepped out on the porch again. He came in time to hear, "_Mr_. Sully, huh? The doc ain't warmed up to you yet?" Hank took another puff from his cigar smirking at Sully who didn't respond. He knew he had to face his father-in-law now and only wished it could have been anywhere but here in front of the whole town. Loren didn't waste time and was lashing out as soon as he spotted the man who had caused all the trouble. "You took my daughter, but you ain't doing the same with my granddaughter. Get outta here! I heard you have a new family, go back to your Injuns and leave us alone!" He was screaming now. Sully tried to put it right, "The Cheyenne are my family but…" Loren didn't want to hear it. He turned to get back into the clinic. "Loren, listen to me!" Sully sounded almost desperate. But the old man had disappeared already. "You an Injun now?" Hank wasn't done with him yet. "Having yourself a little Injun wife?" Sully didn't answer. "What do you wanna do here then? Getting the child and make her an Injun, too?" This time Sully cut him off, "Shut up, Hank! It ain't your business!" Jake wanted to have a word, too, "You weren't around here lately, now were you? But _we_ all were and took care of the girl so it _is_ our business." Robert E. had enough, "I can't remember you doing anything, Jake. We should leave it to the grandparents and Dr. Mike. And don't you forget, Sully still is the father." Now Horace spoke, "Robert E. is right…" and Sully wished the doctor would come out so he would be saved from all the questions. When he spotted Matthew he asked him, "Can I have a word with you?" and when the young man nodded they took some steps aside.

Inside the clinic Michaela put her stethoscope back in her bag. She moved to sit on the edge of the bed taking Maude's hands in hers. "Maude, listen to me. I know it is difficult for you right now but you must avoid any excitement plus you have to stay in bed for at least a week. This attack was serious and it is imperative to keep you calm. Do you understand?" She bent her head to look in the older woman's eyes. "Don't you worry, Dr. Mike, I ain't feeling like getting up right now. But I want you to do something for me." Michaela smiled, "Anything, as long as it's not something upsetting you." Maude shook her head. "I'd like to see Hannah and the boy."

"The boy?" Michaela didn't understand. "Yes. I'd like to speak to Sully. It is important. Please, Dr. Mike." The doctor didn't want to excite the patient, so she gave in. "Alright, I'll get him. Grace, will you please go and see if Hannah is awake?" Both women left the room.

Some moments later Michaela spoke to the crowd which was still lingering in front of the clinic, "Maude will recover though she is very weak and has to stay in bed for at least a week." A voice was heard, "What about the girl?" She answered, "She is fine, no need to worry. Where is Mr. Sully?" Hadn't he promised he would stay? Hearing her voice he came around the corner where he had remained after his talk with Matthew. "I'm here." She glanced at him. "Maude wants to talk to you. Come in, please." Relieved his mother-in-law was alive, but getting nervous what she would tell him, he stepped forward to enter the clinic.

The girl was still sleeping so Maude concentrated on the two young adults in the room. "Sully, I've always seen you as the boy I never had. You are like a son to me, you know that. I will make Dr. Mike promise me something and it would be my greatest wish that you'll respect that. I only want the best for Hannah, please keep that in mind. So, will you listen to me?" Sully mutely nodded. Now Maude turned to Michaela and locked eyes with her. "Dr. Mike, like I said to Sully I want you to promise me something." The younger woman held her gaze. "What is it, Maude?" and she returned to the place on the edge of the bed. Maude took a trembling breath. "Eighteen months ago I lost my daughter. I loved her more than anything but I couldn't help her and neither could Charlotte. Maybe if you'd been in town already…" Her tone trailed off. The room was filled with silence. Then she continued trying to keep her voice steady. "But you were here when we almost lost her precious little girl. You saved her life." Sully's head shot up. "She did?" Maude gave him a look. "The day she arrived. It was the first thing she did, she operated and Hannah got well again. Dr. Mike," and she turned back to her, "you brought her back to life and so I see you as Hannah's mother, too." Michaela's eyes were full with tears by now and she whispered, "I only did my job." But Maude shook her head. "We both know it, you're doing far more than that. You are raising her. My granddaughter loves you, Dr. Mike, like a child loves its mother. I want you to promise me that you don't change that." The tears were flowing freely now. "Maude, you know Hannah means the world to me and I would do anything to make her happy. But I can't promise you _that._"

"Why not?" Maude didn't understand. "Because it's up to her father to find her a mother. He already has a new family…" When Sully tried to speak Maude silenced them both by lifting a wavering hand. "Dr. Mike, I know Sully. Despite his last actions he is a kind and caring man and he will do all in his power to keep his daughter happy. Am I right, Sully?" Sully responded with all the sincerity he could muster, "Ain't nothing I'd like more. All I want is for her to be happy." Maude smiled. "You see, Dr. Mike, we all agree. Now, I want you to give me this promise and then I'd like to sleep a little bit." Michaela was silent. She didn't know what to do. Of course she didn't want to loose Hannah and there was nothing she'd rather do then to stay in the girl's life. But she was sure it wasn't her place to decide about that. She wiped the tears from her cheeks with one hand and raised her eyes to look at Maude. "There is no need for promises right now because you will be well again. But I assure you I'll do my best to keep Hannah happy." Maude carefully watched her. In the meantime she knew the doctor well enough to know when it was useless to press her. "Alright, for now it should last. So, out with both of you, I'd like to rest!"

Michaela and Sully glanced at each other. He spoke first. "We gotta talk." She nodded. "I agree. Let's go to the examination room."

Sully opened the door so she could precede. When she passed by she was so near to him he could smell the soap she used and even a hint of perfume. He momentarily closed his eyes relishing it. Before he could leave as well Maude called him back. "Sully, only one moment." He stepped back into the room. "Sully, is it true, you found a new wife? I mean, I know life goes on…" This time Sully silenced her. "Of course not. The Cheyenne are my family, they found me and they cared for me when I couldn't take care of myself. I don't even want to think about another woman in my life." His gaze involuntarily went to the door and Maude had to smile. "It would be alright with me, Sully. My daughter loved you and I'm sure she would want you to move on and be happy again." Before he could answer she waved him off. "Go now, Dr. Mike is waiting. Oh, and did she already give you one of her tongue-lashings?" Maude couldn't resist asking this. Sully gave her a weak smile. "She hasn't had the chance yet. Hannah was near every time, but maybe I'll get it now," and he left the room to follow Dr. Mike.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 8 

Hearing Sully entering the examination room Michaela turned around from the window. Locking gazes like when they had met in the yard for the very first time they recognized each other for a split second. But she didn't want to know it. _Never again._

She sat down behind her desk. This was safe territory. He stood forlornly in the middle of the room stroking back the long hair from his face.

"Please sit down, Mr. Sully." She pointed to the chair in front of her desk. He didn't budge. "I'd rather stand." They fell silent again and the tension in the room became almost palpable. Michaela knew the law was on the father's side. She knew she had to put up with him for Hannah's sake. She was at a loss how to begin but Sully saved her the trouble. She could hear the sincerty in his voice when he began. "Thank you, Dr. Quinn. Thank you for saving Hannah's life. Thank you for taking care of her." She raised her head to look at him. "You are welcome, Mr. Sully." Again there was silence.

Sully cleared his throat. "Look, all I ever wanted was a family. When my wife died," he had to pause for a moment, "when Abby died my world fell apart." Michaela knew that feeling. He continued. "I thought I don't deserve a family. It took me all this time to find out that it doesn't matter how I feel. I have a daughter. I want my daughter back." It didn't sound like a threat to her so she replied. "I understand that. What do you have in mind?" Maybe they could get along, she hoped. He seemed to be insecure. "I ain't sure yet. Getting to know her I guess. Being here for her. I wanna get her to my Cheyenne family, being a part of it like I am." He was unaware of the effect this had on Michaela. Her mind raced. This she had feared since the moment he had emerged out of that teepee back at the reservation.

"As I explained earlier I'm afraid that last part I can't allow right now, Mr. Sully-" He didn't let her finish. "Whatcha saying?" Michaela grew agitated. "I'm saying she won't go to the reservation at the moment." He couldn't help it but this woman made him loose the grip on his self-control. A huge part of him knew it was wrong what he did but he raised his voice anyway. "It ain't your business! You ain't her mother!" She instantly averted her eyes so he couldn't see the pain. But he did.

Michaela Quinn wasn't one who was silenced by a rebuff otherwise she wouldn't have survived in a man's world. So she shot up from her chair hurling at him, "But I'm her doctor! Forgetting the sickness out there I've yet to diagnose we have to consider her emotional state which is far away from stable, thanks to you!"

A light knock on the door to the hallway didn't let him answer. But he wouldn't have anyway because he knew she was right.

Colleen tentatively opened the door peeking inside. "Dr. Mike? Dr. Mike, Hannah is awake."

Michaela gave Sully a look which made him leave the room. Stepping out on the porch without closing the door he heard Hank's chuckle from across the street. "The doc drives ya crazy? Ain't nothing, ya get used to it."

Sully had second thoughts and was about to return when he witnessed a scene that let him get fed up with himself even more.

In the examination room Michaela squatted down and opened her arms so the girl could toddle in her embrace. Hannah saw the tears in Doctor Mike's eyes and padded her cheek with the little hand. Shaking the head she earnestly told her, "No sad", and gave the woman she loved more than anything a wet kiss on the other cheek. Then she hung on to her neck. Colleen was concerned. "What's wrong, Dr. Mike?" Michaela shortly closed her eyes. "It seems Mr. Sully and I can't find a way to speak to each other without yelling." Colleen was puzzled. "I don't understand. Why?" Michaela shrugged. "I don't know exactly. Maybe he feels I have stolen his daughter and I… I'm afraid of losing her." The last words she only whispered. Colleen tried to reassure her," Don't worry, Dr. Mike. Maybe Sully only has to get used to people again. And I'm sure he won't break Hannah's heart by separating her from you."

Sully had made his decision. He would start carrying out his plan right now. He would let his actions speak. He only hoped he wouldn't fail again.

It had been a very busy afternoon complicated by the fact that Hannah refused to leave her side. After sending Maude home and trying in vain to calm down Loren who was upset because of Sully's return Michaela was on her way home now. She firmly held the little girl in her lap with her left hand and steered the wagon with the right one. Driving this way would soon become impossible because the toddler seemed to grow taller by the minute. But maybe it was useless to think about that. She didn't even know how long they could stay together. Resolutely brushing off this thought she drove into the yard. After the difficult task of dismounting the wagon she placed the girl on the bottom step of the porch stair so she could unhitch Bear. When she brought him into the barn she felt a strange sensation. Something was different but she couldn't put her finger on it yet. And then she saw it. It was unusual clean and tidied up. The animals had all fresh hay and the old one wasn't anywhere to be seen. Next to the door she even found a new heap of fresh straw. Stepping outside she noticed a pile of newly chopped firewood. She was confused. Hadn't she seen Matthew in town this afternoon? Maybe he had had a friend for help.

After dinner and two bedtime stories for Hannah she came out on the porch again to recover from the day's events. And as if it weren't enough yet she knew she still had to face another challenge. Horace had given her a letter from Mother. Sighing she pulled it out of the pocket on her skirt. She opened it and began to read. Every single word was drenched in disapproval. Although she should be used to it by now it was painful as always. But the last two sentences let her freeze. _David is back. His wife died during the flu in Baltimore._

She should have known it. In the last year all went by too good to be true. Now it hit her full force. She would lose Hannah and with every fiber in her body she knew David would come after her sooner or later. For once in her life she gave in to the despair she felt. She let the letter drop on the ground and buried the face in her hands.

Sully, standing in the shadow of the barn, could hear her heart-wrenching sobs.

The next morning saw Michaela Quinn as everyone knew her. She stepped out of the front door bursting with energie. Her schedule was full today. First she would bring Hannah to her grandparents. She had had a long talk with her about that, and then she would drive out to the reservation. Suddenly she stopped. The wagon stood in the middle of the yard ready for her departure. Bear was already hitched. She looked around and shouted, "Matthew? Matthew!" She heard her echo, "Thu, Thu!" Smiling down on the little girl she said, "It seems he was here really early, sweetheart." She entered the barn to look after the cow and there stood the can she had taken to the reservation yesterday. Now she understood. Obviously Mr. Sully had done all the chores. She didn't know how to feel about this. She would have to wait and see where all this was leading.

In the reservation she was warmly welcomed by Snowbird. "It is good to see you, Dr. Mike. My husband is with Little Blackbird. She feels bad this morning." Michaela reached for her medicine bag. "Which is her teepee? Sorry, I can't remember." Snowbird smiled. "I take you." When they pushed the tent flap away to step in they saw Cloud Dancing kneel next to the sick girl. Two other women sat in the back and Mr. Sully too, his arms comforting around Flying Sun's shoulders. Seeing this Michaela was relieved on the one hand. He seemed to be in a relationship with her what meant he was out of the way in this sense and it would be easier for her to talk to him. On the other hand she felt a stab resembling jealousy hitting her.

She immediately dismissed that feeling. She had to concentrate on her job. She nodded to greet them all and knelt down next to the medicine man. He informed her, "She is worse today. She has a bad cough and she burns with fever." Michaela asked for his permission, "May I?" When he gave her a yes with his eyes she started the examination. After finishing she sat back on her heels. "I'd suggest I give her some quinine to lower her temperature and tinkture of lobelia for the cough. This should help her for now." She rose and asked Flying Sun, "For how long has she been ill?" The young woman answered, "Many weeks."

Michaela was turning her speech to all the others now, "I want to examine everybody who is close to her to make sure everyone is healthy. If you are we can assume Little Blackbird's consumption isn't infectious and there will be no need to isolate her." The woman listened to Snowbird's translation and nodded in agreement . The men left the teepee and the doctor got down to work.

After finishing she stepped out and found the Indian and his white brother absorbed in a talk. She cleared her throat. "I have to examine you too, Mr. Sully. Just lift your shirt so I can auscultate your lungs." She put the ear pieces of her stethoscope back in her ears and waited for him. She didn't know he was dreading her touch. Sully looked at Cloud Dancing and when he nodded he untucked his shirt from his buckskin trousers but started protesting nevertheless. "I don't think-"

"Sh!" Michaela laid her free hand light like a feather on his chest to silence him. Her touch sent a lightning right to his heart blazing afire there and it seemed to strike back at hers as well because when he looked down at her he saw her blushing heavily. She instantly withdrew her hand. "Turn around, please," she said in her doctor's tone as if nothing had happened. When she was ready she turned to Cloud Dancing. "Their lungs are all healthy. That's a good sign. We can let the girl stay with her family. Cloud Dancing, I'll give you the quinine for her. It must be administered every six hours, a pinch in a glass of water." The medicine man nodded. "Thank you, Dr. Mike. Can you stay to examine all others?" The woman doctor smiled at him. "Today I will see all children and tomorrow the adults." The Indian was satisfied. Michaela turned to Sully. "May I have a word with you before I leave?" He was surprised. He hadn't thought she would want to talk to him so fast after yesterday's disagreement. "Of course, why not."

Examining the Indian children nearly broke her heart. It filled her with deep sadness and remorse seeing the malnourished children. She found one other case of consumption and had made it sure already that it wasn't infectious, too.

Before she was about to leave Sully approached her. She tried to ignore the uneasiness she felt and began, "If you want Hannah to live here she will starve like the Indian children." It amazed him that she used almost the same words as his friend had chosen. "Did you speak to Cloud Dancing about that?" She was puzzled. "Why should I? I'm not blind and in case you forgot I'm a doctor. I know the difference between being slender and being malnourished. Sully shuffled his feet uncomfortably. "Well, no need to worry about that. I ain't have the intention to really let her live here." Michaela didn't dare to believe what she just had heard. "But what about your family?" They looked at each other by now. "The Cheyenne are my family and they understand," Sully replied. "What does that mean for Hannah, Mr. Sully?" He tried a shy smile when he reminded her, "Like I told you yesterday I wanna get to know her first. I wanted to ask you for your help. I know I will need it." Not to mention the fact that spending time with his daughter would mean spending time with _her_.

Attempting to hide her relief Michaela looked down at her feet. She took a deep breath and raised her head again. "Well, then we should make a plan." He received his first smile from her. Although it was a very small one it filled him with incredible joy.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 9 

_She was twenty-two again and she wore her nicest dress in anticipation of what was sure to be the happiest moment in her entire life. This evening David would ask her to marry him, she was sure of it. They had met each other during their work at the General Hospital three years ago. They even had made plans about what they would do after her final graduation this summer. Although David didn't possess enough money to open his own practice he had promised to make it possible that she could work with him. For the first time in her life her mother was satisfied with something she did. She met a handsome young man who adored her and whose father was a doctor, too._

_And David had even started to show her a new world of feelings. She blushed with only the thought of the kisses he recently gave her. Though she had to admit she felt uncomfortable most of the time she trusted him when he told her nothing was wrong with that and she would enjoy it soon. She had no experiences in these matters but she was sure David would never do something to hurt her. _

_He had asked her to wait for him at their favorite restaurant and he had announced a surprise. And then he came, a stunning looking young woman on his arm._

"_Michaela, I'd like to introduce you to Catherine, my fiancée."_

She shot up from her bed and gasped for breath. Looking around she found herself at the homestead of Mr. Sully. Trying in vain to calm down her racing heartbeat she took her shawl and stepped out on the porch. She had survived the humiliation a long time ago. She had found out that these feelings weren't the worst because she could speak about them with her father. But she couldn't tell him that even after the engagement party David still assured her he loved her, tried to kiss her and didn't leave her alone. He still told her she was his true love and he only married Catherine because his and her father had made an agreement to open a new practice in Baltimore. He actually had made her the offer to come to Baltimore, too.

Michaela took a deep breath. She wasn't that young inexperiencend woman anymore. She knew her own mind. But one remnant was still there: aside from her father she had never ever trusted anybody again.

Michaela and Sully met each other at the clinic the next morning. This time they sat face to face at her desk and Michaela began, "Mr. Sully, there are some things we should make clear first if this can ever work at all." He had no objections.

"Hannah knows that everybody calls me Dr. Mike and it would confuse her if you further address me as Dr. Quinn." Sully nodded. "That ain't no problem. Go on." She continued, "I'm sure you noticed that your daughter immediatedly took your wolf to her heart. Having him with you would be a big help." He mutely nodded.

Straightening in her chair Michaela went on. "But what's most important," she slightly hesitated, "I have to be with her all the time. She fears nothing more at the moment than waking up somewhere and me not being there." Sully reddened. "I'm sorry I didn't think…" Michaela interrupted. "We don't have to discuss it, Mr. Sully." Now he finally could make a point. "It's just Sully, Dr. Mike."

She looked up at him and studied his face. She still didn't know what to make of him. Did he really know what he was about to get involved in? Well, it wasn't her choice, was it? She took a deep breath. "Sully, alright." She cleared her throat. "Colleen will bring Hannah when I call for her. When I explain who you are I have to ask you only to listen. Will you do that for your daughter?"

She pulled a framed photograph out of a calico bag. Sully instantly recognized his wedding picture. He swallowed and folded his arms in front of his chest. Michaela watched him and when she felt he was ready she rose from her chair, opened the door to the hallway and called for Charlotte's girl. Colleen came out of one of the rooms and carried Hannah down the stairs. Michaela took her in her arms and went back to her place behind the desk.

Recognizing the man Hannah tightened her grip on Dr. Mike but then she remembered. "Wo?" Sully smiled at her, "He is waiting outside." Satisfied the little girl relaxed a bit.

Michaela took the photograph and showed it to Hannah. "Do you remember this, sweetheart?" Instantly a little index finger pointed to the faces. "Ma. Pa." Michaela smiled at her. "That's right. And now I want you to look at the face of your pa in this picture again." Hannah nodded and did so. "Sweetheart, and now look at this man carefully." She pointed at Sully. "Don't look at the hair. It is longer now. Look at his eyes. Can you see it?" Hannah studied the picture and then the man again. She was astonished. "Pa?" Michaela gave her a hug. "That's right, this is your pa. He is here now and he wants to get to know you."

Hannah immediately tensed. "Don't worry, I'll be with you all the time, I promise." Hannah buried her face in Dr. Mike's shoulder and shook her head. Michaela cajolingly whispered, "And the wolf will be there, too. What do you say?" The girl lifted her head and searched for reassurance. "Mi? Wo?" When the answer was a nod she straightened and turned around to look at the man. She didn't speak to him but she watched his face. After a long silence she tried the new word, "Pa."

Sully had witnessed the talk in amazement. He hadn't expected the girl would even know about her parents. It was difficult for him to keep his emotions in check. So he only looked at Michaela and his voice cracked when he said, "Thank you."

During the next two weeks Sully made it a habit to start his day in the barn of his homestead. He did the chores without disturbing Michaela and Hannah. After that he brought the milk to the Cheyenne children and then he went to town. There he met his daughter at Grace's Café with Maude and the doctor or he sat with Charlotte and her children in the kitchen of the former boarding house. Sometimes he made odd jobs for Robert E. to kill the time till Dr. Mike would come out with Hannah. He would never forget how happy he felt after his daughter had given him the first shy smile. And he could not deny that urge to be near Dr. Mike. She made him want to show that he could do better than he did until now.

But he sensed that restless feeling beginning to surface again. He hadn't had looked after his traps for a while and he missed waking up at his lean-to without already having plans. He had become used to not being fenced in by anything or anybody. He still didn't want to think about what he would do after his daughter had got used to having him around. Maybe he should take his time to make some decisions. The only thing he knew was that he never again would abandon his daughter.

During the last two weeks Michaela had done her best to establish a relationship between Hannah and her father. All went well because the girl trusted her. That's why she watched Sully closely. Until now she had no reason to doubt him yet. Only during the last days she had felt something was bothering him. This afternoon they would go to the reservation together and take Hannah with them. She hoped for a possibility to talk to him.

"Be careful, sweetheart!" Michaela laughed watching Hannah on all fours in front of them. The girl giggled and sat back on her bottom clapping her hands to clean them from the dirt. Sully couldn't remember the last time he had felt so at peace. They were taking a break on their way to the Cheyenne village. They sat on the log he remembered all too well. She had just finished telling him about the operation. His remorse almost took his breath away. "I should have been here." Propping up his arms on his thighs he buried his face in his hands. "I should have been here." Michaela's heart went out to him. She tentatively touched his shoulder. "You are here now, that's all that matters."

They caught each other again, locking gazes, unshielded for a few seconds. In the sunlight he noticed for the first time that her eyes were different colours. He was speechless for a moment. He couldn't believe he was sitting next to her, even talking to her. This time she didn't recoil and his voice was low when he gently asked, "What is it that makes you so sad?" Instantly her guard was back. She hastily jumped up. "We should go."

In front of the teepee Michaela bent down explaining to Hannah, "I have to go into this tent. There is a little girl who is really sick. I'll try to help her. I want you to stay with your pa, alright?" The girl shook her head. "Sweetheart, please. It won't be for long, I promise. Look at your pa, he'll be sad if you don't stay with him. You don't want him to be sad, right?" Hannah hesitantly turned to her father. He had allowed her to play with Wolf and he knew exciting stories. He even made funny sounds telling them. Dr. Mike wouldn't be far away, so she finally nodded. "Good." Michaela patted the fair head and rose to look at Sully. Before she could speak he smilingly told her, "We'll manage, you go in."

After the doctor had entered the teepee Flying Sun stepped out. Spotting Sully and his daughter she came to them. "You finally brought your daughter. Can I hold her?" Hannah instantly disappeared behind her father. "We should give her time," Sully indulgently advised. The Indian woman nodded.

After a moment of silence she asked, "Can I speak to you?" Her brow was creased in sorrow. "Sure, what is it?" He gestured to sit down. "I need your help." Her pleading eyes captured him. "Anything, you just ask." This woman had helped him through the toughest time in his life. First she had helped nurse him back to health and when he finally could take care of himself again she had been his companion on countless walks. He really liked her and he thought he owed her every help she wanted. Flying Sun knew that. "I am scared about my sister. Soon we go to winter camp. She is weak. I think she could stay in your house. Ask Dr. Mike, please."

They hadn't noticed the doctor was already back. "Ask me what?" Her voice startled them and they simultaneously rose. Before Sully could speak Flying Sun blurted out, "I want take my sister to your house." Michaela paled. She had already thought about the possibility that Sully would want his house back; after all he recently had done all the chores there. And with the house of course he would want his daughter. It was inevitable. She only hadn't expected it to be so soon and she even had hoped for another solution, but…Making an effort to compose herself she answered, "Well, it is Sully's house and it's his decision." Her thoughts were clearly written on her face and Sully wanted to get it straight. "It's not what you think, Dr. Mike… " She interrupted, "It's alright, I understand. I only think it is too soon to…" He reached for her arm to stop her. "Listen to me. It is not for long, it is only…" He searched for her eyes. "Dr. Mike? What's wrong?"

And then he heard her whisper. "Where is Hannah, Sully?"


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 10 

"Sully, where is Hannah?" He turned around to look for the girl. "A minute ago she was right behind me," he was baffled. "But not anymore! Where is she now?" Michaela couldn't hold back the flood of emotions any longer. Her voice rose. "You were to watch her for just five minutes! Five minutes!" He tried to reason with her. "Calm down! She can't be far away, she's only small." Michaela was incredulous. "I should calm down! She was in your care for the first time. You only had to watch her for tiny five minutes and now she is gone!"

Alarmed by the loud voices Cloud Dancing and Snowbird approached. „What is wrong?" Snowbird asked. "Hannah disappeared just a minute ago, she must be here somewhere," Sully still wasn't concerned. Seeing how the doctor was about to lose control over herself Cloud Dancing sensed there had to be more. Why was Dr. Mike in such a distress? He laid his arm around her shoulder. "Come with me, Dr. Mike. The women will find her." He guided her away from the others.

His voice was soft when he asked, " What is bothering you?" Michaela knew she was acting irrationally. The soothing voice of the medicine man made her almost break down. She desperately tried to compose herself. "I'm sorry, it seems I've lost my head. I knew from the beginning that Sully would want his daughter back. I only thought I would have more time to prepare her." The next words were barely audible. "And me, too." Cloud Dancing didn't quite understand. "Why do you think he will take her now?" Wiping a tear from her cheek she told him, "He wants Flying Sun and her sister to live in his house. He just told me so. That means I'll have to go." The Indian couldn't believe it. "This must be a misunderstanding. Sit down please," and he helped her down by the fire.

Going back to Flying Sun's teepee he searched for the woman. When he found her he took her to task. "I want an explanation." She guiltily looked down. "I only did it for Little Blackbird. I'm worried about her. In a house it is warm and dry and there is a cow..." Her voice trailed off. The medicine man straightened and his words were now spoken in Cheyenne. "Look at me. You know you are wrong. We have rules. You are a member of this tribe. First of all you should have spoken with one of the eldest about your concern. We would have looked for a way to help if it was necessary. The tribe stays together otherwise we won't survive. By the way, we will set up for winter camp tomorrow morning. Now go, help them find the child. I will talk to Sully." She tried to object. "But Sully agreed!" Now she could feel him getting angry. "Go!" Letting her head hanging down she obeyed.

In the meantime Hannah was found by Snowbird. Looking for Dr. Mike the little girl had entered the wrong teepee. Because it was the tent for the supplies no one had noticed it. Now Sully was carrying her back to her foster mother. When Michaela spotted them she rose. Father and daughter stood in front of her, both with guilt readable on their faces. They gave her a shy smile and the expression of asking for forgiveness in their identical eyes let her immediately soften. Reaching for Hannah she told her, "Don't you do that again, alright? You frightened me." The girl eagerly shook her head and made herself comfortable in Dr. Mike's arms. Sully cleared his throat. "I'm terribly sorry. I should have paid more attention. It won't happen again, I promise." He tousled the girl's hair with his left hand receiving a smile in response and laid the right one lightly on the woman's back.

Michaela felt the warmth of his hand fall through the fabric of her blouse, penetrating her skin. And inside her chest melted a piece of the lump that had made its home there for over nine years.

Sully's voice was soft. "It's gonna be dark soon. You should go home. We're gonna talk tomorrow. And don't you worry, we'll find a way."

After the two had left Sully looked for his brother. An Indian told him he and the other eldest were planning their departure to the winter camp. When Flying Sun spotted him alone she walked to him. "You are staying," she wanted to know. Sully frowned. "Sure, for a while. Why are you asking?" She informed him, "We will leave tomorrow morning." He hadn't expected it to be so soon. "But what about your sister?" Looking to the ground the young woman shuffled her feet and admitted, "Cloud Dancing forbade it. The tribe must stay together." He understood. With new hope she glanced at him and asked, "Will you help me? Come with me?" Now he started to feel uncomfortable. "I have to think about it."

The next hours he spent contemplating what he should do. He was torn. He'd just now achieved some progress with Hannah and he had the distinct feeling Dr. Mike began to enjoy his presence as well. Even the thought of it made his heartbeat quicken.

On the other hand he didn't know if he would have the opportunity to make such a journey with his Cheyenne family again. More and more tribes had to live in reservations without the permission to go to other places. But he loved their way to travel and had already accompanied them three times. He could have long talks with his brother again and he could keep his promise to help Flying Sun. Keeping promises…He had told Dr. Mike they would talk tomorrow but with the Cheyenne on their way it wasn't necessary anymore. He straightened and his face lit up in anticipation. He would go with his family. Dr. Mike would understand. But he had to make sure she knew he would return.

The next morning Michaela stepped out of the front door, Hannah in tow. The girl spotted it first. "Wo!" She excitedly clapped her little hands, "Wo!" and she toddled to the small wooden figure standing on a sheet of paper on the chair next to the door. Michaela looked around. Sully was nowhere to be seen. Hesitating she reached for the paper after Hannah had taken possession of her new toy. It only read one sentence obviously written in a hurry.

_I'll be back, I promise._

Nothing else. Not why he went, how long it would last and where he would be. She had to sit down for a moment. What should she make of it? How to explain it to Hannah? Maybe Cloud Dancing knew something. She decided to change her plans and start her day at the reservation. But today the cow wasn't milked yet and so it took two hours until she finally arrived at her destination.

They were gone. The place was empty as if it always had been this way. No sign of one living soul around. Why didn't they tell her? Was it dangerous to know? But why? She had thought she could rely on Cloud Dancing, not to mention Sully. They never had given her the feeling they doubted her. She felt a wave of disappointment flooding her.

_Trust._ She should have known it.

One Friday evening some two weeks later Charlotte, Maude and Michaela were gathered around the midwife's kitchen table. The girls were there as well and between laughter and several cups of coffee and hot cocoa they talked. The mood was comfortable so Maude dared asking, "Did you hear from Sully, Dr. Mike?" Instantly all eyes went to her. She shook her head. "Nothing." The disappointment still lingered. Hearing the familiar name Hannah became attentive and stated shaking her head, "Pa. Wo." Maude sighed. "I don't understand that boy. He seemed to like to be around you." Michaela slightly blushed. "Who actually knows what's going on in the mind of a man?" The women nodded in understanding, smiling. Colleen was curious. "Have you ever been in love, Dr. Mike?" Charlotte was taken aback. "Colleen!" But Michaela didn't mind. "When I was very young I thought I was." The girl asked again. "What happened?" Now curiosity had gotten to all of them. "Well, at the evening I thought he would ask for my hand he introduced me to his fiancée. Her father had offered him a practice." The women gasped simultaneously. Colleen's eyes went wide. "How horrible! What did you do?" Michaela sadly smiled with the memory. "I told her it was nice to meet her. I wished her luck, got up from the table and went home." Now silence filled the room. But the doctor didn't want to ruin the nice evening and so she smiled and reassured them, "That was a long time ago. I'm over it, really. No need to worry. In fact I'm glad I didn't marry him. I'm sure it saved me a lot of trouble. Who wants to live with such kind of man, right?" Now all nodded empathically. "So, let's talk about the weekend. I thought Hannah and I would be very, very lazy. Doing some chores, reading some stories and sleeping a lot and not even coming to town. How does that sound?" She hugged the girl on her lap a little bit tighter and received a peck on the cheek in response.

On Monday morning she stopped the wagon in front of clinic, hopped down and took Hannah out of the children's seat Hannah's father had made for her. When she stepped on the clinic porch she sensed there was something different. Turning around to the street again she noticed a crowd of men including a broadly grinning Loren. She was puzzled. "What's the matter, Loren?" The old man grumbled good-naturally, "Aw, nothing, Dr. Mike. You just go in." Now suspicious she tentatively approached the clinic door. She searched for the key in her pocket but she didn't have to turn it because the lock was already opened. So she pushed the door to step in. She heard a male voice greeting her, "Good morning, Michaela. I thought you might need some help."

Her face drained all colour. "David, what are you doing here!"

She was trapped between the crowd behind her and the man she never wanted to see again in front of her. She felt Hannah getting frightened and decided first to take care of the girl. She spoke to David, "I want you to leave my room. After I take Hannah to Colleen I will speak to you. Outside!" He replied, "You are still the same, untamed and beautiful. But you are wrong. This is my room as well." He grinned triumphantly. Michaela was taken aback. "What are you talking about?" Now Loren joined in. "Aw, Dr. Mike, after you are married you will stay at home anyway. So we gave him the clinic." He was pleased with himself. The thought of Dr. Mike marrying this fine young doctor was very satisfying. He was startled when he saw the angry face of the woman. "I don't know what you are talking about, Loren, but I assure you I will never, you hear me, never marry this man. That's final! And now I have to take care of your granddaughter who is frightened thanks to you!" The last words she hissed through clenched teeth. Without looking at the men again she carried Hannah to the door into the hallway.

Alone with the girl in the dimness of the corridor she leant against the wall and closed her eyes. Trying to compose herself she stroked the soft locks on the little head and whispered reassuringly, "It will be alright. Don't worry, it will be alright."

She went upstairs and knocked on Charlotte's door. When her friend opened she began to tremble. The midwife gave her daughter a wink and Colleen took Hannah to the room next door. Charlotte led the doctor to a chair at the table and helped her sit down. She sympathetically asked, "Is this the man you told us about?" Michaela merely nodded. The older woman sighed. "Oh dear. He arrived on Saturday and spent the last two days convincing the men that after you married him he would manage the clinic anyway so they could give him the contract right now." Michaela paled again. "They fired me without even asking if it was true?" Charlotte was full of compassion. "I'm so sorry, Dr. Mike." She laid her arm reassuringly around the younger woman's shoulder. "I'm so sorry. "


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 11 

Michaela decided to leave the clinic through the back door. She walked away without the men noticing. When she finally reached the church she looked around for the reverend, who, spotting her, attempted to slip out before he had to face her. But it was too late. "I want an explanation, reverend." Her tone was angry. Timothy Johnson knew he was in trouble.

"Dr. Mike, we thought you would approve the suggestions your fiancé made." Michaela's voice rose. "How can you assume something like that without even asking me! You should know me better by now! And this man is not my fiancé!" Her eyes were shooting fire. "I demand a meeting with the town's council as soon as possible." Relieved to get off of the hook this way for the moment the reverend eagerly agreed. "I think we can do it this evening. Let's say we'll meet here at seven."

Crossing the bridge on her way back she saw the crowd still lingering. Bracing herself for the next argument she stopped for a moment and smoothed out her skirt. Straightening she started to continue her way when she was halted by a soldier who was catching up with her. "Dr. Quinn," he asked. She span around, somewhat startled. "Yes. What is it?" The young man reddened. He had never seen such a beautiful though angry face before. "Excuse me, ma'am. Sergeant McKay needs to talk to you." Michaela softened seeing the insecurity of the soldier. "Alright. Where is he?"

Sergeant McKay was worried. He had managed to keep the peace in this territory during the last weeks. But he knew with the new orders it would become more difficult.

When the doctor arrived he immediately asked, "Dr. Quinn, can you tell me something about the whereabouts of the Indians?" He had heard that she did much more for them than her contract included. Michaela was surprised and her mind began to race. Maybe she could find out now why they had disappeared so suddenly. "I'm sorry, but I can't help you, Mr. McKay." They watched each other carefully. The sergeant was the first one to speak again. "I'm sorry as well but I don't believe you, doctor." She simply replied, "Well, that's your problem." She wouldn't give away anything without knowing if it would hurt the Indians. Acknowledging her determination McKay made the decision to tell her the necessary things. "Dr. Quinn, I just received the order to keep the Cheyenne at their present place. I sent some soldiers out this morning but the village was gone. If I don't locate them and bring them back in time the army will be chasing them. General Custer already has announced his interest." That statement was alarming her. "In this case I would help if I could, but I actually don't know where they are. When I went out there two weeks ago the place was empty like your men found it. Now I'm sure Cloud Dancing deliberately didn't tell me to save me the trouble keeping a secret." The sergeant pondered her words. "Two weeks ago? Then they might have made some progress. Maybe they even already have reached their destination. As long as they are not moving anymore they should be safe for the moment. It seems we can't do anything about it." They stared at each other in joined concern.

Hurrying back to town Michaela noticed she almost had forgotten about David. The shock and anger about his appearance faded in comparison with the grave danger the Cheyenne were in.

Fortunately in the meantime the crowd was gone. When she stepped into the examination room David sat behind her desk reading in her medical records. Hearing her he looked up. "You are using Indian remedies?" She wouldn't let him intimidate her. She straightened, raised her chin and told him, "That's none of your business. And now get out!" He rose from her chair smiling self-confidently. "You've heard the men, Michaela. This is my room as well." She wasn't afraid anymore. "Maybe, we will hear about that at the town's meeting this evening. But the interior and these files are my property so you'll need my permission if you want to use them." She didn't waver this time. He smirked. "Like I said, you still are the same. I've always loved your temper, Michaela. Well, then I'll see you at that meeting. I'm really looking forward to it." He reached out to cup her cheek in his hand but she flinched with disgust. He chuckled, blew her a kiss from his fingertips and finally left.

Cloud Dancing stood on top of a slope looking down on his people. The trek of Cheyenne moved slowly but steadily. Although there had been no unusual occurrences they were not fast enough. If they didn't reach their destination within the next week the army could find them and force them to go back. The eldest had been informed by dogsoldiers that it had happened to some other tribes. Surviving the winter near Colorado Springs would be very hard. Most of the buffalos were gone, the bears hibernated and finding other food would be almost impossible.

He watched Sully leading the horse that pulled the litter with Little Blackbird. He frowned. When he had seen him among his people at the first evening of the journey he had been taken aback. He had expected him to be with his daughter. He had seen how he had grown attached to the girl and the woman doctor as well. Sensing his disapproval his brother had been avoiding him until now. But when their gazes met for a moment this time the medicine man knew they would be talking later this day.

Enveloping a cup of tea with his hands Sully sat cross-legged next to a fire. He was tired. Although exhausted from the day's march sleep didn't come easily to him. Dreams had been haunting him for a few nights. He'd heard his daughter crying for him and the dismatched eyes of Dr. Mike had waited everywhere he looked.

The first two days he had enjoyed the trip. He'd relished the steady movement, the fresh air and he'd felt like a part of the nature that surrounded him. It'd felt good to help Flying Sun with her sister by carrying her and telling stories. But soon the first euphoria was gone. He had fresh air under his lean-to as well and of course he had to admit his help wasn't really needed. And the reason Flying Sun had asked him to come was completely different. He vividly remembered the second evening of the trip.

_Sully had been noticing the looks Flying Sun was shooting him every now and then. He was aware that she realized the disagreement he had had with Cloud Dancing. The first night he had slept by the fire because he was on guard and so he didn't need to choose a teepee. But tonight he had to make a choice… and it was this thought he was lost in when Flying Sun had decided to make a move. Confidently she had approached him with a blanket. "You can sleep in my teepee tonight." Her smile was full of anticipation._

_At first he didn't get it. "But you are already so many persons in there." The woman's smile broadened and she made her intentions clear. "The other will sleep in my aunt's tent tonight," and she presented him with the blanket._

_Suddenly he had understood. "I can't do that." He had stepped back from her. "Why not?" She was persistent. He'd thought he had already settled this. "You know why, I've already told you." She still hadn't wanted to let him go. He was starting to understand she maybe never would. She had asked, "Is it because of Dr. Mike? That can not be because you sent her away. But you are here with me now." He had sighed then. He had to try and make her understand for good. "I've told you before I even met Dr. Mike I can only be your friend." Though she had become somewhat unsure by this point she continued. "I can see it in your eyes that you like me. I do not mind to wait for the love." Sully had felt exhausted. He'd taken a deep breath and exhaled slowly."Flying Sun, listen to me. I like you very much and I know I owe you. You are a part of my family. I'm sorry, but if I ever loved you it would only be as a brother. Believe me, that will never change."_

_This time he hadn't felt guilty when her face had been clouding over._

If he was honest with himself he had to admit he had known it not only by then that going with the Cheyenne had been a mistake. When his brother joined him by the fire he simply stated, "I will leave with sun-up." Cloud Dancing merely nodded. They sat in silence for a long time. Finally the medicine man started his speech. "You once told me all you wanted was to have a family. When I found you I offered you mine. But it is time now to build your own. You have already known that for a while. It was not right giving promises that made you let down other people. You know it was a mistake leaving them. I hope you will not be too late." Sully's head shot up. "What do you mean?" The Indian told him matter-of-factly, "The spirits told me she is in trouble. She will not be there anymore if you are not back in time." Neither of them had to speak out loud that they were talking about Dr. Mike.

When Michaela entered the church this evening she only found the members of the town's council and David sitting at the table on the other end of the room. She had expected it would be a meeting like every time, with the citizens as audience. This way there would have been women as listeners, too. She had hoped for their support. Well, then she once again had to face it alone.

All heads were turned towards her when she walked up to them. Recognizing her readiness for the battle Loren tried to explain, "Aw, Dr. Mike! We only wanna dowhat's best for you!" She stopped him talking with a glance and he made a face looking down on his hands. Michaela sat down on the next chair without the common courtesy of a man pulling it out for her. She didn't mind.

An awkward silence filled the room. Hank sensed that the others were about to change their minds. Well, he didn't have the intention to do so. The toff from Boston wasn't only a good customer at his saloon he even had offered him new business connections. So he took the initiative. "We shouldn't have hired a woman in the first place. It's a man's position…" Michaela coolheadedly interrupted. "I can't remember you complaining when I treated your girls or sewed you up after your fights, Hank." But he had a purpose and he didn't want it to be ruined. "Yeah, maybe. But now we have the opportunity to set it straight and I ain't willing wasting it." The reverend lifted a hand because he wanted to mediate but the lady doctor was faster. "Well, Hank, maybe you'd rather waste the money of this town." Alarmed the men gaped at her. "What do you mean, Dr. Mike?" Horace asked what everybody wanted to know.

Michaela explained. "I have a contract with this town. I fulfilled it on my side. If my being a woman is your only reason to fire me I will sue the town." The men were stunned. They had known she would resist their idea but they sure hadn't expected that.

David watched with his arms crossed in front of his chest and smiled. This was the woman he knew, never giving in. But he also had his plans. Things in Baltimore hadn't went well after his wife had died. His father-in-law had stopped giving him the money he needed for his stockmarket transactions. He had hoped to find new opportunities here at the frontier. "Gentlemen, there is no problem. You don't have to take her contract away, you only have to give me one as well. Michaela and I know each other. We've even already worked together for a few years. I'm sure we will manage to share the rooms of the clinic." Relieved the men nodded in approval. Without giving Michaela time to protest again the reverend asked, "Who votes yes?" All hands shot up. "I do." The men rose from their places to shake the new doctor's hand, leaving a paralysed Michaela alone at the table.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 12 

"I don't want you to sit at my father's desk!" It was the next morning and Michaela desperately tried to save at least some pieces of her privacy. David chuckled. He was in an excellent mood. "Don't be silly, Michaela. There is no room for another desk here. I promise I won't carve a heart on it." She knew what he was getting at. When she had been foolish enough to be in love with him, they had had a special tree in a park in Boston. They used to sit on a blanket under its huge top. One day when he had told her his love was forever, he had carved a heart with their initials on the bark. She had felt so happy then. Now she didn't understand how she could have been so naive. Well, at least she had learnt from it. If he thought he could resurrect her feelings for him, he was wrong. So she didn't respond to his remark and only said, "We'll have to set a schedule. I suggest I'll be in charge in the mornings and you'll take over in the afternoons." Oh well, he was inclined to let her have this little victory and grinned at her. "That's alright with me." Rising from her chair, David informed her, "I have to talk to that barkeeper. We are making some plans together." Michaela frowned and couldn't stop herself to ask him disbelievingly, "You have plans with Hank!" Again a grin tugged at the corner of his mouth. "You will see, darling, you will see."

She winced as if he had slapped her. "Don't call me darling, David. Those times are over and I assure you they will never come back!" With her renewed anger her voice rose, but all she received was an amused look. "We will see about that as well. You don't want to be an old maid, do you? I can help you not to waste your fire, Michaela." He laughed freely now and was about to leave the room when a knock was heard.

David opened the door to a mother and her ten year old son. He turned around to Michaela now determined to get back to their discussion. As he knew she couldn't argue with him with a third person present. "I believe there is a patient for you. I'll see you later, _darling_."

But the woman with the boy stopped him. "Actually I came to consult you." She avoided Dr. Mike's questioning gaze feeling very uncomfortable. She blushed and told the man in front of her, " My husband said I should see you about Benjamin." She looked down at her boy and pulled him closer. She hated to do that to the lady doctor but her husband had been adamant. And David was pleased. This started even better than he had expected. "I'm honored madam, but I only work in the afternoons and I have another appointment right now." Without waiting for any response he passed her and crossed the street.

The woman gazed after him unsure what to do now. Michaela wanted to help. "Why don't you come in and I take a look at your son, Mrs. Deaver?" She smiled and hoped she would wake up from the nightmare she seemed to be in. But the woman had made her decision and shook her head. "I'm really sorry, Dr. Mike. I can't do that. Billy told me last night that the men have decided to support the new doctor. Hank had offered anyone who wouldn't consult you any longer a 10 percent discount. Of course no one had wanted to refuse that."

Taking her son's hand she stepped down from the porch and quickly left without looking at Dr. Mike again.

Five days later, Michaela had to admit that the men of the town had relegated her to the background. She had seen not even one single patient. Only Charlotte, Grace, Robert E. and Maude had assured her that she still was their doctor. But with only a few people who were willing to come to her in the future, she couldn't earn her living. So she had to ponder her possibilities. Though she had come to love the little town, without work she couldn't stay in Colorado Springs. And David made things even worse. He persistently asked her out for lunch or dinner. He followed her whenever she took a walk and every morning she found a bouquet of fresh roses on her desk. It began to get on her nerves.

On the other hand there was Hannah. Leaving her was no option…But without work, such thoughts were useless anyway. Suddenly it occurred to her that there could be a last resort.

"Mr. McKay, may I have a word with you?" The sergeant was astonished to see her. He had no idea what the doctor could be wanting from him. "Of course, what can I do for you?" Michaela had struggled with it the whole day. "I will put it as simple as it is, Mr. McKay. I need work. Do you know if there are any other tribes of Indians in this territory? I could take care of them like I've done with the Cheyenne here." She looked up at him with fearful hope. The soldier regarded her with sympathy. He had heard that the town had been boycotting her. He thought they were idiots. "Not that I know." Seeing her shoulders sink, he offered,"But I know the army is establishing a new base a few miles away from Denver and they are looking for a doctor." He could see how hope flooded back in her eyes and smiling at her he promised,"I'll send a wire right away to ask if the position still is vacant."

Fortunately, it was and they actually didn't care about her being a woman. But the snag was she had to live there, and they awaited her within the next week. Entering the mercantile to tell the Bray's she had to move, she saw Hannah bouncing on Loren's knees. Every time he stopped she noddingly looked up at him and demanded, "'gain!". And her grandpa obeyed with a sigh. Spotting Michaela he sat the little girl down. "Thank god you are here, Dr. Mike. That child wears me out." But his smile belied his words, everybody knew he had a soft spot for his granddaughter.

Michaela braced herself for the upcoming talk. Bending down she asked Hannah, "Sweetheart, would you please go and bring grandma here?"

"Maude, Loren, there is something I have to tell you. Maude, are you alright?" Sensing that Dr. Mike was anxious about her reaction to what she had to tell them, the older woman started to be concerned and merely nodded. Michaela continued, "I'm sure you are aware of the fact that the town has practically kicked me out of my job." Loren immediately tried to interrupt, "Aw, Dr. Mike…" But she cut him off. "I'm not here to complain about it, I'm here to tell you the army gave me a new job." The old couple gaped at her, Maude with amazement and Loren unbelievingly. "The problem is I have to move to Denver even though the job will only last until March or April." She allowed her words to sink in. "Assuming Sully is on his way with the Cheyenne he should be back in February or so. I can take Hannah with me till then. They offered me a house to live in." After a long silence she added, "Of course I need your permission since her father is not here. And I promise we will be visiting you as often as possible." Finally Loren found his voice again and he immediately rose it. "I ain't giving permission to …" When he felt his wife's hand on his arm, he stopped and turned his head to her. "I ain't allowing her…" Maude squeezed his arm. "Let me, Loren." His answer was an unnerved, "Aw…" Now Maude looked at the young woman she had begun to see as a daughter. "I'm glad you found a new job, but how can you work for the army, Dr. Mike? I thought you were on the Indians' side." Michaela assured her, "Of course I am. Unfortunately, there will always be young men being injured, so they are going to need a doctor. It's only temporary until they finished the army hospital at the new base. After the Indians returned from their winter camps, I'll go back working for the government. And maybe…" Her voice trailed off for a moment, but taking a deep breath, she spoke again,"Maybe until then David is tired of Colorado Springs without the comforts of a big city. And I'm sure as soon as he'll realize I'm not giving in, he might have second thoughts about settling down here." Maude nodded. "I understand. So it will only be for a few months?" Michaela shrugged. "I hope so."

Loren was fuming with anger. Pushing the saloon's doors out of his way he stormed in and searched for the barkeeper. Spotting him at a table in the back, he didn't pay attention to anything else and finally reaching him he shouted at Hank, "That's all your fault! Now this crazy woman is taking my granddaughter and moving to Denver!"

Although it wasn't even dark yet, the barkeeper was already inebriated. His sarcastic smile didn't reach his eyes. "Calm down, ol' man. Whatcha talking about?" Now Loren directed his anger against the man he had admired and supported at first. But when it came to little Hannah, he couldn't take a joke. He pointed his index finger at David and yelled, "You better pack your things and leave. I ain't losing Hannah because of you!"

David didn't pay attention to Loren. He gulped down the next whiskey. Although he would never admit it, David was alarmed. He had only chosen this dump because of Michaela. He had been convinced he could win her back. Way back in their courting time, it had been enough to present her roses or take her out to the opera when he had angered her. But considering her reaction after he had introduced Catherine to her, he should have been warned. Her rejections began to frustrate him beyond measure and now she even had the cheek to announce her move without even telling him. After taking another shot of whiskey, he rose to his unsteady feet, adjusted the new holster and went out of the saloon to get to the place she lived with that girl. He would put the record straight that she couldn't do such things.

Sully had been on horseback without taking any breaks for the last week. He had only stopped when it had become necessary. He was exhausted to death but he was here now. When he came in sight of the homestead he dismounted his Indian pony. Soundlessly stepping closer, he heard an angry male voice. He couldn't distinguish the words yet so he left his horse behind, gestured Wolf to follow him and slowly stepped closer.

It was obvious to Sully that the man in the yard was drunk. Although he wore an expensive suit, his appearance was dishevelled. Looking down on the stranger, Dr. Mike stood on the porch, Hannah in her arms. Now he saw that she whispered something in his daughter's ear, sat her down and the little girl hurrily scampered into the house. When Dr. Mike had closed the door behind her, she turned back and stepped down the porch stair. She didn't seem to be afraid. Sully was near enough now to understand how the man scoffed.

"The proud Miss Quinn, princess of Beacon Hill is living in a shack now! Your mother would suffer a heart attack seeing you here, Michaela!" Sully was taken aback when he heard him speak the name he only dared whisper to himself at night. But _she _only looked around as if she noticed her surroundings for the first time. And instead of being embarrassed, she felt as if she finally had arrived at home.

"You know what, David? I'd rather live in this shack as you call it, than with you in the finest place in Boston. I don't want to see you, David. Go back to town, or even better, go back to Boston!" She turned around and then she saw him. He had never seen so much relief on a face.

David's drunken thoughts stumbled. He wouldn't let her get away with that. He combed his mind for another idea what else he could do, when he suddenly out of the corner of his eye saw an Indian with a wolf by his side. He fumbled for his gun and shouted, "Beat it! Go!" Sully lifted his hands a bit and told the stranger, "You heard the lady. She don't wanna see you here." He gradually and slowly moved in Dr. Mike's direction so he could shield her with his body. The wolf growled deep in his throat. Finally it occurred to David, "You are the savage she lives with! I should go so you can have her? Never! I'd rather shoot her!" With that, he finally fumbled his gun out of the holster. The weapon almost fell out of his hands and he drunkenly tried to get a grip on it. The shot that was suddenly heard had his head spinning around, but a body falling with a thud instantly sobered him.

"Oh my God!" That was all he could think.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 13 

While David stood motionlessly, only staring at the fallen body, Michaela instantly was on her knees next to Sully. She couldn't see a wound yet so she pulled at him with all her might to turn him around. As he lay on his back, she could see an alarmingly growing blood stain on his chest. With shaky hands she ripped the fabric of his shirt open. Now seeing the entry wound, she gasped in horror. The bullet had hit him very close to his heart and the blood poured out of the hole like a steady stream. Knowing the meaning of what she saw, she suddenly changed into the doctor who was needed. She pressed the fabric of the torn shirt against the wound and looked up at David. "Help me bring him inside!"

No response. The next time she yelled, "David! Help me!"

He finally sprang into action and bent down to lift up the man. Although he hadn't seemed to be very tall, his body was heavy and in his drunken state David had to struggle not to drop him again. But Michaela's firm look urged him on. She preceded them into the house and showed him the bed to lie the body down on. Then she took David's hand to replace hers on Sully's chest. "Press down here," was all she said.

First she quickly went to Hannah who sat wide-eyed on her bed clutching Bunny against her chest. "Sweetheart, your Pa is sick. I need to help him and I want you to stay here in your bed. Will you do that for me?" The little girl was frightened but she recognized when Dr. Mike was serious. So she nodded, holding on to her toy even tighter. Michaela stroked the child's soft locks, gave her a peck on the cheek and whispered, "I love you, Sweetheart. Don't worry, I'll help your Pa."

Moving to the door to close it, she silently prayed she could keep that promise. When she stepped back to the bed with her medical bag, she noticed how David rolled up his sleeves. Michaela worriedly demanded to know, "What do you think you are doing!"

"I have to operate, Michaela. If I don't, he will die." His tone was still slurred.

"He will die if you operate! You are drunk, David. Look at your hands, they are shaking! The best you can do is go back to town and tell Charlotte I need her here as soon as possible."

He only stared at her. Aware of the little girl in the room she didn't scream at him. But she hissed through clenched teeth, "You've already done enough here, don't you think?"

He tried to convince her as much as himself. "It was an accident, Michaela."

She was sick and tired of this man. "Go! I have to work!"

On his way back to town, David realized his situation was serious. He had to think quickly. The cool night air sobered him further. Well, with Michaela, he had messed up things for now. On the other hand, he wasn't known as a man who gave up so easily. Regarding the business he had started with the saloon owner it couldn't go any better. He had made inquiries about the possibilities of buying the land with the hot springs near town. He could get it at a good price and building a hotel there would make the investments profitable very soon. Maybe he could even kick out that barkeeper after he had established himself enough. But for now, he had to think about what to tell in town. Since there had been no witnesses, his word would stand against Michaela's and he only had to be the more convincing one.

When Charlotte entered the homestead half an hour later, she was overwhelmed by memories. A lifeless body on the huge bed, blood soaked clothes on the floor…But Michaela, relieved to see her, got her back to reality quickly.

"Thank god, you are here. Please hold the lamp for me, I need more light. And could you please put that cloth over his mouth and nose when I tell you so?" She had already made an incision on Sully's chest and was probing with a pair of tweezers for the bullet now. Finally she got a hold of it and showed it to Charlotte with satisfaction. But it was only a short moment of triumph. She instantly went back to work and muttered under her breath, "The aorta seems to be intact, only slightly grazed. A few stitches should make it…" And then she worked on in silence.

Charlotte watched her in awe. Although she had always believed Dr. Mike to be a good doctor, it was another thing to see her in action. Her delicate fingers moved quickly and surely, her expression was concentrated. There was never any hesitation, she always seemed to know exactly what had to be done.

Two hours later, Sully had a bandage on his chest and Michaela was exhausted. In the meantime Charlotte had managed to clean up, put Hannah to sleep and even made coffee. Handing Michaela a cup now, she anxiously asked, "Will he make it?"

Michaela, still all the doctor, answered, "Well, we'll have to wait. We'll have to observe if there are any bleedings. He has lost a large amount of blood. If we were in a hospital, I would suggest a blood transfusion. Though he is strong his body appears to be exhausted. I don't know what he had gone through before he arrived here."

The women sat in silence for a while, only sipping the coffee. After a few minutes Charlotte tentatively asked, "Dr. Mike, what happened out here?"

Michaela closed her eyes momentarily and took a deep breath. "David was drunk. He came here and yelled at me. Suddenly Sully appeared and David threatened, he'd rather shoot me then to let me be with Sully. He brandished his gun and then there was the shot and Sully fell down."

Charlotte was shocked. "He should be put in jail for this!"

But Michaela was convinced, "As far as I know David, he will find a way to make it all my fault." Again they were silent. Finally the doctor spoke again. "Charlotte, thank you for your help. I'm sure Sully will appreciate it as well. But you should go home. There is nothing else you can do right now. I'm going to need you tomorrow again with Hannah and the animals…I'll have to keep vigil to observe Sully's condition. He can't be moved to the clinic, it would be too dangerous. And to be frank, I don't want David neither near Sully nor myself at the moment." Charlotte rose from her chair and squeezed the younger woman's shoulder. "That's understandable. Of course my family will help, one word and we are here."

At dawn Sully began to regain consciousness. He noticed that his body didn't rest on its usual ground. He felt a sheet under his palm and pressing slightly on it, he recognized a mattress. Obviously he lay in a bed. He couldn't remember the last time when he'd slept in a bed. He didn't live in a house anymore, did he? He forced his eyelids open and his astonished gaze met the ceiling of his homestead. He tried to get up but a cutting pain in his chest made him fall back. Then he heard a woman's voice."Shh, please, you have to lie still." A woman's voice! At the homestead? He slowly opened his eyes again and murmured in bewilderment, "Abby?" When he finally could see a face he saw this shining brown hair and these mismatched eyes. He blissfully smiled. "The angel," was all he said and then he fell back into the darkness.

Michaela was concerned. Except for this little moment on the first night, Sully hadn't regained consciousness yet. All she had been able to do for the last two days was watching him and changing the bandages. The only good sign was that there hadn't been any new bleedings. But his body was drying out and she only would be able to give him water if he was awake. She sighed and leaned back in the rocking chair. Maybe in the morning…

Sully woke up by a strange sensation. He felt soft hair under his chin, warm breath hit the side of his neck and something seemed to choke him slightly. He slowly opened his eyes and tried to find out what was going on. Before he could discern anything, he felt the sensation taken away. And then he saw his still sleeping daughter in the arms of Dr. Mike. She carried her away and when she was back by his side, he still was confused. He tried to sit up but he couldn't. Groggily he fell back. "What…" His voice cracked.

"Please, you have to lie still." She bent over him and explained, "You have been shot, Sully. I had to operate. The bullet hit close to your heart. Though I sewed the aorta to make sure it won't rupture, you have to lie in bed for a while." She watched him for signs of understanding. When she saw the memory coming back she smiled. "Now that you are awake, I'm sure you are going to be alright." He returned the smile and his blue eyes gleamed when he assured her, "If you are there, I'm sure I will."

Hearing that, the caring expression of the doctor turned into the disappointed one of the woman. She quickly turned away but he had seen it anyway. She cleared her throat. "I apologize for Hannah. Since you've left she had made it a habit to come to me in the middle of the night to sleep with me. I believe she wasn't aware it was you this time. Although of course she knows that you are here now. Obviously I've fallen asleep in the rocking chair, so I didn't notice."

He wanted to tell her how sorry he was, that he was the one who should apologize, but the woman was gone and the doctor was back and asked,"Did she hurt you?" He hastily replied, "Of course not, I was just confused." She nodded. "Good. That's good. Well,…" she took a deep breath to prepare for the upcoming tasks, "We not only have to observe the wound for any infections, we also have to bring your strength back. First of all you have to drink a lot…" At this point he interrupted. "I'd like to talk to you, Dr. Mike. Please?" His pleading gaze made her blush and she answered, "We will talk, but not right now. First you should get more rest."

The next few days went by as if he was still living in a dream. To ease the pain Dr. Mike had administered him laudanum, so he always was in a daze. He saw Charlotte with Colleen come and go, Grace brought food and even Matthew had been inside shortly. Yesterday Maude was there and he could tell that the women had to discuss something really serious.

When he had woken up a few minutes ago, he'd felt much better. The ache in his chest was still there, but only dull. He wouldn't take any drugs today, because he finally wanted to talk to her. When he looked around, he saw his daughter sleeping with Dr. Mike. The woman rested on her back and the girl lay on her stomach almost on top of her. He had known it from the first moment he had seen them together, he could have the family he wanted. He only had to convince her, though he had no idea how?…

Hannah took a nap and Michaela sat in the rocking chair. She glanced at Sully, he seemed to be asleep as well. She silently sighed. She had lost the job in Denver, because… they didn't want to wait any longer. Maybe with Hannah's father back, she could search for a job further away…though she didn't know how long he would stay…she had to discuss it with him…

When her eyelids almost dropped, his voice startled her. "We gotta talk, Dr. Mike." Her head shot up and they both knew it was time.

He began, "I know you have every right to be mad at me. But I was sure it was my last chance to go with them. They've been my family for so long and I had promised Flying Sun I would help…" He tried to read her expression. Michaela considered her reply. "I understand, Sully. I really do. But obviously you are still not able to see that we neither have to discuss what you felt nor what I felt. It is only your daughter who matters. Either you are her father or you are not. You can not come back into her life making her like you and then disappear without any explanations to her. _To her,_ Sully, not to me. In the beginning she asked for you and the wolf every day. She is a little girl, but she is very smart. She understood you went away because other things were more important to you. You should decide very quickly if you want to be her Pa or not. I don't know how big the damage already is but if you really love her, you have to decide soon."

His reply came without hesitation and was passionate. "Of course I want to be her Pa. It's all I've ever wanted. I promise, I'll be there for her now. I promise."

But Michaela had heard too many promises in her life. "I'm not interested in promises, Sully. A child needs safety. Your daughter needs to know she is loved by her father. The only way to do so is to be there for her, even if there are other things you would rather do."

He told her with all the power of persuasion he could muster, "I'll be there. You'll see."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 14

Dr. Mike had left to go into town for the first time in a week.The door wasn't even closed behind her yet when Sully called, "Colleen, come here!" He pointed to the chair next to the bed for her to sit on. "Tell me about her."

Colleen grinned seeing the expectant look in his eyes. "What do you want to hear? You've been with her for some days, maybe you know more than I do." The girl was as eager as Sully to talk about Dr. Mike. The doctor was her favourite topic.

He sighed. "I've been sleeping most of the time. And when she's talking, it's only about my health or about Hannah, though she talks a lot about her. Not that I don't wanna hear that…And before I left, we've never been alone. There was always someone else, so I never could ask her; and of her own accord she didn't give anything away." He frowned, remembering their first weeks. In those days he had had the feeling that the tension from their falsestart had weakened with time. She had even seemed tobegin enjoying their time together. And he could tell it wasn't only because of his daughter. Then he left them… He sighed again. "So, I wanna hear everything, tell me right from the start. How was it, when she arrived?"

Colleen began. "When she stepped out of that stagecoach…And then she operated without even seeing her own room before…Then even Hank came for sewing his cuts…When Mr. and Mrs. Bray asked her to take Hannah in and to move out here she didn't want to at first."

At this point she needed some air to be able to speak further and Sully took this chance to ask, "Why not?"

With sparkling eyes she replied, "Oh, it's not what you think, she wanted to take care of Hannah but she didn't want to move here because she thought it was your house and she had no right, but I convinced her."

Sully was astonished. "How did you do that?" Colleen grinned.

"I told her she should see it as Hannah's home. Then she gave in." He returned her smile. "Good job." For some moments they remained silent, each lost in their own thoughts.

Finally Sully asked the question that had occupied his mind since he had been able to think clear again. "She ever talked about this man? He seemed to know her, even called her by her first name".

The girl snorted in disgust. "He's such a jerk."

After she had told him the story, she added. "And now she's even lost her patients because of him. The day you returned she told us she would move to Denver." Seeing the shock on his face she hastily assured him, "She won't need go anymore, because she lost that job, too. They wanted her to come immediately, but she couldn't because she was taking care of you." They stared at each other in common worry. _She could find another job._

Another thought occurred to Sully. "What was she going to do with my daughter?"

This time Colleen weighed the words carefully. Maybe she could make him understand Dr. Mikes plans depended on his action. When she had decided how to answer she looked at the man and wasn't a girl anymore but a young woman. "You left only saying you would be back. Dr. Mike doesn't trust men. It's sad, but she also doesn't believe in promises. But she had started to think you could be different. I know so because when we once talked about Abigail…"

He sharply interrupted, "I think my wife shouldn't be a topic of gossip."

But Colleen instantly shot back, "How can you say such things about Dr. Mike! No one knew if you would come back when you ran away after the funeral! And then you left again without any word! She only wanted to know about your wife because she wanted to tell Hannah about her mother!" Colleen almost screamed by now. She let herself fall against the backrest and crossed the arms in front of her chest.

Sully closed his eyes momentarily and swallowed. "I'm sorry." He waited a moment. "But you still didn't answer my question."

Colleen gave him a wry look. "They'd offered her a house. She'd intended to take Hannah with her until you came back with the Cheyenne." After a short pause she dared a question that had been on her mind for a while. "What are _your_ plans, Sully? Are you going to live with the Indians again?" Before he could answer she asked what she thought would be even worse, "In town they say you have an Indian wife. Will you get her to live here in your house?" Colleen thought that would be the worst because then Dr. Mike would leave for sure. And she didn't want her to leave. She'd never met such a woman before who even treated her as if she were a special person, too.

"Never listen to what they say in town, Colleen. I don't live with the Cheyenne anymore, I have my own places. I want Dr. Mike to stay here as much as you do. I just don't know yet how to make her see it."

Instantly the girl's face lit up again. "I could help you, I'd like that."

Although Michaela was already near town, her thoughts still lingered at the homestead. The wound worried her. It didn't heal as properly as it should. Maybe she could make an ointment by herself, as Cloud Dancing had taught her. If she remembered right, there was still a stock of dried sage and camomile at the clinic and…Suddenly she noticed that she'd arrived in front of the mercantile. She braced herself for the upcoming discussion. She had decided that this time she wouldn't confront them all together but find allies at first. Loren fit perfectly for that plan. When she entered the store he immediately spotted her and attempted to sneak out through the backdoor. But it was too late. "Loren, may I have a word with you?" Her tone was polite.

Angry because of getting caught he turned around. "Aw, Dr. Mike, I don't wanna be involved in that matter." And he meant it, since he had realized that he was torn in this case. On the one hand it would be good if that Mr. Lewis stayed in town because the business with him was promising. On the other hand, if he went away, Dr. Mike could work here again and he wouldn't have to wonder all the time if he lost his little girl. "There ain't nothing you can do anyway."

She was sure, at least she had to try. But first it was important to know what David had told them. "Why not?"

Loren rolled his eyes. "Aw, you are a week too late; the town council has already discussed it. Mr. Lewis told us you were talking to each other and suddenly Sully and his wolf had appeared and threatened you. Because he had thought it could get dangerous, he wanted to be on the safe side and had pulled out his gun. And the shot had only been an accident."

Michaela shook her head. "He was always good in bending the facts. Well, I hope the shot _was_ an accident. If not, then it will be me who's still in danger, Loren. David threatened _me _and Sully was only in his way."

Loren didn't want to believe it. "Aw, Dr. Mike, why should he…"

But she cut him off. "Because he was drunk and I didn't give him what he wanted." She watched him. "And Hannah was out there, too. It could have been her, Loren."

He had to admit that with these words she had him. "Aw, damned. But there ain't nothing we can do, really. It's too late. No one will believe you, I mean no man from the law. This doctor is really good with his words." He silently cursed. He shouldn't have been so gullible. Though he didn't like him he knew, Sully would never threaten a woman. If he had argued at that meeting, he was sure, Jake would have followed his lead, and…Such thoughts were useless now. "But I will talk to Hank to make sure that man stays in town when he's drunk." Michaela contemplated it and then agreed. Maybe this was all she could expect.

She was back at the homestead at lunch. She had to smile at the sight she met entering the house. A blanket had been draped over a chair and now it was a cave for the wooden wolf and Bunny. The real wolf wore one of her red silk scarves as a ribbon and lay sleepily by the fire. He looked like a huge Christmas present. The girls were both on the floor next to him and giggled heavily. And Sully seemed to enjoy it all.

"Colleen, will you please set the table? I have to first tend to Sully's wound again." All heads flew in her direction. A double "Dr. Mike!" was heard and "Mi!" as the echo. "Oh, then you recognized me, that's good." Her smile seemed to lighten the room.

After she had hung her coat on the hook next to the door she stepped to the bed. "I need to examine the wound again, Sully."

He questioningly looked at her. "Why?"

Unbuttoning his shirt she answered, "I want to be sure it's healing the way it should." She was taking away the bandage now.

"But I don't think…" He stopped when she gave him an almost playful look.

"I'm the doctor, remember?" Under his watchful eyes she carefully probed the wound. Feeling her soft warm fingers on his skin almost literally took his breath away, so he sharply inhaled. Hearing that, she met his gaze. "Did I hurt you?"

He tried a grin. "'Course not."

Her eyes, barely two feet away from his, showed concern. Actually the beginning of an infection could be seen. Well, the paste she had made at the clinic should do it.

She took the pot out of her medical bag and opened it. But when she was about to apply the medicine, his hand stopped her.

Grasping her wrist he asked, "What's that?"

She didn't understand why he reacted this way. "It's an ointment that will support the healing process."

He was shaking his head now. "I ain't needing it." She was puzzled. Why did he suddenly question her? He explained, "I don't wanna take stuff like that."

She started to become impatient. Her voice rose slightly. "This wound needs treatment, Sully. And as your doctor I'm telling you that the ointment will help."

He shook his head again. "I ain't needing it. My body heals at its own pace. It's something I learned from the Cheyenne."

She was angry by now. "Will you tell me, Cloud Dancing never uses medicines to support the healing of a wound?"

He wasn't as adamant as a minute before. "Well, yes, but…"

She didn't let him finish. "If Cloud Dancing would have given you that, would you have refused it as well?"

He didn't want her to be angry with him, but he had his principles, too. "I think not, but..."

She straightened. "So is this because I'm a woman?" Her raised chin indicated that he was in trouble now. "'Course not!"

Colleen's voice interrupted their discussion. "Dr. Mike, I think Hannah is getting frightened." Michaela immediately bent down to take the girl in her arms.

Colleen reproachfully looked at Sully and shook her head. Her eyes told him that was not the way to win Dr. Mike over and he gave in. "Alright, I'll take it."

Though Michaela wasn't placated. "Fine. And only for your information, I made this paste the way Cloud Dancing showed to me."

Now he was astonished. "He taught you about his medicine!"

She couldn't suppress a little bit sarcasm, "He's not like other men. _He_ trusts me." Still offended she turned away from him. "Children, let's eat."

She was short with him all afternoon. He knew he had to set it straight soon. When Hannah finally was sleeping, he asked her to sit down beside the bed. "I didn't mean no disrespect, Dr. Mike. But Cloud Dancing had taught me that a wound only needs fresh water to clean it and air so it can breathe."

She sighed. "That would be alright if you'd just scratched your leg, Sully. But you have a different kind of wound." She hesitated. "I'd thought at least you would have trusted in my abilities as a doctor."

He immediately assured her, "I do! Really. I ain't never objecting again." He gave her a sheepish grin and she couldn't help it but her anger melted away.

The oilment was working and Sully grew stronger day by day. Nevertheless she only allowed him to get up to go to the outhouse, so all he could do was talk and read. Though he loved to read and never was a man of many words, the talking part was the much better one. He'd found out that telling her especially about his childhood in New York made her open up to him. But he also told her about his time as a miner and the cave-in he went through. She'd cried with him when he told her about the night Abigail died. She told him she'd have done everything in her might to save his wife if she'd been there. He knew she would have. Never before in his whole life had he been as attached to another person as to her.

A few minutes ago he'd just finished telling her about his older brother. Now they both sat in silence with tears in their eyes. When Michaela looked at him she still was able to see the little boy, frightened to death. She covered his fidgeting hands with hers and tried to soothe him, "I'm so sorry." Meeting his tortured gaze she stopped thinking, slid close to him and took him in her arms. He wept on her shoulder like a child and they swayed back and forth together until his tears were gone and the scar in his heart wasn't raw anymore.

The next evening they sat face to face together again. Michaela struggled with herself. She'd wanted to ask him for a long time why he'd come back. Suddenly she heard him speak, "I came back because I've come to the conclusion it's been a mistake to leave."

Michaela's gaze flew up to meet his. Had she said out loud what she'd thought? Blushing she hastily assured him, "You don't have to…"

He bent towards her and stopped her by softly placing the fingertips of his right hand on her lips. Instantly her blush deepened. He whispered, "I wanted to be here with you." They were drawn together by a power that couldn't be resisted. When their lips were only an inch away from meeting the sound of approaching horses broke the moment. Before she rose he gently run his thumb along her lips and whispered, "I'll be here when you come back."

Smiling shyly down on him she replied, "I hope so."

Reality had her back when she opened the door and recognized the riders. Looking back over her shoulder she told him, "It's Sergeant McKay with two soldiers."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 15 

After she had talked to the sergeant she came back to Sully keeping her distance this time. She didn't know what to expect when he learned about the news. Hesitantly she told him, "The Cheyenne will be back within the next few days."

For a moment he remained motionless. But then he suddenly threw back the quilt from his body trying to get up.

"What do you think you are doing?" She was instantly by his side, gently pressing on his shoulders to stop him. When his gaze met hers, she recognized the boiling anger she had seen there before. Immediately she removed her hands and stepped back from him.

He snarled at her impatiently, "I ain't staying here playing sick when they are in danger. I gotta go to them."

She assured herself with a look over her shoulder that Hannah was still asleep. Turning back to him she tried to stay calm. "And then what, Sully? They are escorted by a unit of soldiers. Will you fight them all by yourself? Don't you think the Indians would have done it by themselves if they had been able to do so?" He was reeling backwards from his sudden rise and fell onto the bed again. "And as you can see, it's obvious that you are in no condition to go anywhere."

He groaned and hit the quilt with his fist. "I shouldn't have left them at all."

Michaela was taken aback. Just a few minutes ago, she had felt such an immense attraction for this man and now he seemed to be a complete stranger again. Embarressment overwhelmed her when she was thinking about her behaviour from earlier. She went to the bed where his daughter slept and looked down at the innocent child. Affectionately stroking the soft blond locks, she bent down and gave her a peck on the cheek. The girl smiled and slightly moved in her sleep. Though she wasn't her, mother Michaela loved her whole-heartedly and felt responsible for her. Wiping away her own feelings, that she wasn't supposed to have anyway, she turned back to Sully. After silently crossing the room, she clasped her hands in front of her. Looking down on them she said quietly, "I thought you had made your decision."

Not understanding what she meant he searched for her gaze. "What are ya talking about?" He still sounded angry.

Determined to not let him intimidate her she met his eyes. "You gave one of the promises that men seem to like. You said you would be there for Hannah. But if you intend to leave, fine. Only this time you will explain to her first why you think it is more important to you to be with other people. And afterwards I'd suggest, for you to never come back again. You are grown-up, you should know that decisions have to be reasoned before you announce them and let other people think you will stay to your word."

He was speechless for a moment. Then he gulped and assured her, "I ain't abandoning my daughter again. What makes ya say that?"

"Well, hearing the Cheyenne will be back, you immediately jumped up to get to them. And a moment ago you said you shouldn't have left them at all." Suddenly a thought hit her. He had said he didn't want to live with Hannah at the reservation. But hadn't he asked her if that Indian woman could live here? What if he wanted to live with Flying Sun in this house? Oh my god, _she_ would have to leave the child!

Seeing how she gradually drained all colour he hastily assured her, "Wanting to help the Cheyenne has nothing to do with Hannah." He received no reaction to that.

Michaela's mind raced. _She_ had to leave! Well, of course she had known that it would happen some day. But she had hoped there would be more time to prepare herself. She had had the feeling, at least for now, that Sully didn't mind her still staying in Hannah's life. _She would be on her own again. _The situation wasn't new to her._ Losing someone she loved. _Alright, she would face it.

Clearing her throat she told him, "I have to go to town tomorrow because I need some supplies. I...I will ask Loren if he knows somebody who rents a room. As soon as I…"

"Why do you want to rent a room?" He still had no idea what she was talking about.

"Well, before you left you told me that you wanted Flying Sun and her sister to live here. I think I should be moved out by the time they are back." She went to the hearth to make some tea that would help her to steady her nerves.

He shook his head. "That ain't no option anymore." Her eyes flew to his and he added, "Cloud Dancing forbade it. The tribe has to stay together."

The relief she felt almost took her breath away. She didn't have to leave right now. But she had been reminded that she had to think of the future, for Hannah's sake. Without looking at him she asked, "When I go into town tomorrow, do you think you can get along with your daughter on your own? It will be only for one or two hours."

"Sure, why not." He knew he had startled her a few minutes ago. And he also had noticed that her demeanour had changed. He should work on his temper, he thought.

Entering the mercantile the next afternoon, Michaela was greeted by Loren standing behind his counter. The instantly grumbled words, "Aw, Dr. Mike, where is this granddaughter of mine?" made her laugh.

"It's nice to see you, too. Loren. And no need to worry, your little girl is at the homestead with her father. I thought it's about time they learned to spend time together."

Sensing the underlying meaning Maude stepped to them. She knew the young woman well enough by now to know something had happened. "What's wrong, Dr. Mike?"

Michaela sighed. Sometimes she wished Maude wouldn't be as wise. "The Indians will be back soon. Sully was very angry about that because it is evident that they had been forced to do so. Surviving the winter here will be hard for them."

Loren was puzzled. "I don't care about the Indians. What do they have to do with Hannah?"

Michaela chose her words carefully. "Sully considers the Cheyenne to be his family. What happens to them happens to him. Since he wants his daughter to be a part of his life…"

Before Loren could give his angry comment Michaela was distracted by a real bad cough. She turned around to look for the source of this terrible sound and met the troubled eyes of Mrs. Deaver. The woman recognized the concern in the doctor's eyes and was even more worried now than she already was. "Dr. Mike, I don't know what to do. Benjamin fell into the creek last week. The day we met in front of the clinic Dr. Lewis examined my son and told me that it was normal that he'd catch a cold. But it was getting worse so we went to see him again. But he only told me I should make sure to give him enough to drink and that he has to get a lot of fresh air. But you just heard him, Dr. Mike. It scares me."

While Mrs. Deaver was telling her this, Michaela had watched the boy. He shielded his eyes from the sunlight, scratched behind his ears and his crimson cheeks indicated a fever. "You should see Dr. Lewis immediately." She was already pretty sure what it was and if she was right they would have to act quickly.

Mrs. Deaver told her almost desperately, "But the clinic is closed! He has the sign on the door! Couldn't you…?"

Michaela was torn. On the one hand it was David's patient and his turn, but on the other hand she knew she couldn't just step aside and wait to see what would happen. She sighed. "First we'll look if we can find Dr. Lewis." Turning back to Loren she told him, "I'll send Colleen to gather my things. I have a feeling that I won't have the time to come back and get them."

After hearing from Hank that David was in Denver because "even a doctor has a personal life," Michaela decided it would be too dangerous to wait. So she had opened the clinic and after examining the Deaver boy, she told his mother what she had already known. "Benjamin suffers from the measles, Mrs. Deaver."

The woman was shocked. "But Dr. Lewis said it's only a cough."

Michaela stayed patient. "Cough is one of the symptoms. I'm sure you've noticed that your son avoids bright light. Besides, he has a fever, too and look at this." She carefully moved the outer ear and a rash was revealed.

Now the mother gasped. "Oh my god, what am I gonna do?"

Michaela tried to give her some other news. "I'm afraid, there are already some complications. When I listened to his lungs I even discovered the beginning of pneumonia. I'd suggest Benjamin stays at the clinic at least for two days so I can watch him."

Suddenly aware that the boy wasn't her patient, she amended, "Dr. Lewis will watch him."

But the concerned mother had heard enough. "I want you to stay with my son." When Michaela tried to object, Mrs. Deaver didn't let her. "I don't care what that fancy doctor says. I want you to take care of my son. I'll only go to get some things for him from our home. I'll be soon."

When the woman stepped out of the clinic door, the usual crowd was already there. People stopped talking upon seeing her.

Hank's mocking tone was heard. "Bill ain't gonna be pleased that you see that lady doctor again b'cause it'll cost him a lot of money."

But Mrs. Deaver didn't let him get to her. "I'm sure he will be much less pleased learning that this doctor of yours didn't even recognized that his son is sick with measles!"

Now the noise set in again. A female voice told, "My god, I think my daughter…"

Two hours later it was evident, that there actually was already a measle epidemic and three children had to stay at the clinic overnight.

When the older Cooper kids arrived at the homestead it was already dark outside. Matthew immediately started the chores in the barn and Colleen knocked at the door of the house and stepped in. "Hello, Sully!" Bending down to hug the little girl she added, "Hello, Hannah!"

But Hannah wanted to see someone else. "Mi?" She looked expectantly first at the door and then up to her big friend.

Colleen promised, "I just have to tell your Pa something and then I will talk to you, alright?"

Hannah climbed into her chair at the table and waited. She knew something was wrong, but she was sure it wouldn't be as bad as she feared because Colleen smiled when she talked to her Pa. Finally Colleen called for her. "Come here to your Pa, Hannah. Dr. Mike wants me to tell you something."

Her little heart started pounding wildly in her chest. _Where was Dr. Mike?_ But Colleen still smiled, so did her Pa. She went up on the edge of the huge bed and hoped that all would be good.

Now Colleen unfolded a piece of paper and started to read. "Sweetheart,…"

The little face lit up. "Mi!"

Colleen grinned and started again. "Sweetheart, you know I told you what I have to do because I am a doctor."

The toddler nodded. "Care for sick."

"I have to take care of sick people. Some children here in town are really sick. They need me to stay with them."

The little girl startet to get up. "Go to clinic."

"But you can't be with me at the clinic this time because you could get ill, too. I don't want you to get ill. Do you understand?"

Hannah nodded and Colleen continued reading. "And I want you to be a big girl for your Pa. He would be scared all alone in the house." Hannah turned to her father. Sully played along, made a face and reached for her. She went into his arms and waited for Colleen to go on.

"Since I can't be there to give you your good night hug I send you my shawl." Colleen bent down to the bag next to her and pulled the turquoise garment out. Then she draped it around the little shoulders how Dr. Mike had wanted it. "Now you can feel my embrace."

The girl snuggeled down in the soft material. Sighing contently, she even could smell Dr. Mike. Her face lit up again.

"Well, Colleen will sing you your lullaby tonight and I'm sure your Pa will be glad to tell you a bedtime story. Good night, sweetheart. I love you. Dr. Mike."

Sully asked dryly, "And where is my letter?"

Colleen grinned at him. "Sorry, but it's only for little girls." She gave the letter to Hannah who immediately pressed the paper against her chest.

Sully was amazed. He had never experienced two people as close together before. Alright, maybe Cloud Dancing and Snowbird. He wished so badly to be a part of this feeling of belonging together. But all he had done so far was to cause them trouble and pain. What was he thinking when he thought he could win both of them over? Maybe he had been right in the first place. He didn't deserve them. But he had made a promise and he was determined to prove Dr. Mike wrong. He would stick to his word. He would be there. For both of them.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 16 

Hannah had come to him in the middle of the night. She had brought the bunny and Dr. Mike's shawl with her and was still sleeping now. She had made herself comfortable against his chest. He could feel how her steady breath warmed a spot on his skin. It felt wonderful to hold the child so close. His gaze wandered through the room, meeting his wedding picture. Abigail would have been so proud of their daughter…He sighed and closed his eyes again. Abigail was gone. The grief had softened with time and Cloud Dancing had taught him that it was useless to hold on to things you'll never get back. It would mean to waste the future. He didn't want to waste his time. He could finally be a father. Opening his eyes again he looked down on his daughter's face. But a child needs a mother, too. Looking back at the photograph an idea hit him. He knew what he would do. Taking in the faint smell of Dr. Mike from her shawl he smiled and went back to sleep.

David came back by stagecoach at noon the next day. Hank had waited for him and even before the doctor had hopped down on the soiled street the barkeeper growled at him, "Ya better hurry up before that woman takes over the business again."

David didn't react. He had only one thing on his mind. He had to get to the clinic as quick as possible. Focusing on that task he wasn't aware of his surrounding, he only tried to move straight ahead. The moment he arrived on the clinic porch Michaela came out for fresh air. She had sat with the children all night and was beyond of being tired. But seeing David in the state he was in gave her nerves a kick. She immediately directed him into one of the recovery rooms. Fortunately, only Benjamin had to stay further so this one was empty. Helping David down she recognized the seriousness of the situation. After she had taken his temperature she knew she was right. 104 degrees, rash and cough. After she had administered quinine to him and couldn't do anything else at the moment, she stepped out on the porch again.

She was somewhat surprised seeing the great number of people waiting. There were men curiously awaiting the upcoming events and women with angry faces. And Hank was the one who asked, "What's going on, Michaela? We wanna talk to that David of yours."

Michaela didn't deign a look at him. She spoke to the crowd. "Dr. Lewis had caught the measles from the children. He even has developed a serious pneumonia and is in a bad state. If adults suffer from measles it will always be dangerous, far more dangerous than for the children." Many-voiced murmur was heard.

"Would suit you fine if he passed away, wouldn't it?" It was Hank again.

"I do my best with every patient. _You_ should know that by now, Hank." The sarcasm was lost on him.

"How do we know you're not gonna kill him?" The saloon owner saw all the opportunities his new friend had promised vanish into thin air. The murmur increased.

The reverend, who had just stepped to the crowd, was taken aback. "Now you are going too far, Hank. We all have known Dr. Mike for a long time now and I'm sure you all agree that nobody should talk to her this way."

Michaela gave him a faint thankful smile. But the seeds of doubt were sown and if David didn't survive, the gossip could ruin her reputation. The reverend seemed to know what she was thinking. After a short hesitation, he suggested, "I can sit with Dr. Lewis. He will need the support of the Lord."

Though she knew he only wanted to help, it hurt her to see that they already didn't trust her enough to let her work without observing. And she had to ask the clergy man, "Had you have the measles yet? If not, it would be dangerous for you, too."

"Oh, I don't know if I've had them. But I'm serving the Lord and for that I'll take every risk."

Now an angry female voice was heard. "Do you really think Dr. Mike would kill a man? That's ridiculous! How many of you have needed her before and even when you were downright rude to her she smiled and helped you?" All gazes were on Charlotte now who had heard enough. She earned nods in approval from the women and embarrassed ones from some men.

When Hank started to object Loren cut him up this time, "Aw, Hank, shut up! You ain't caring for that doctor, you only care for your business. Let her go in and do what she has to do."

Grumbling the barkeeper turned back to his saloon, some men in tow.

The afternoon went by quietly, but towards midnight it got worse. The reverend, who had come in nevertheless, wasn't a help at all. So Michaela had to call for Charlotte for her assistance. It was already the second syringe of fluid she had drawn from David's lungs within the last hour and the fever remained far too high. So she made a decision. "I'll brew him some willow bark tee. It will help with his fever and is antiphlogistic as well."

The reverend frowned , "Isn't that some Indian remedy?" He wasn't sure if this would be a good idea.

"Yes, it is. And if I may remind you, it helped you last year with your tonsillitis." She gave him a wry look and went back to work.

Then she had to wake up David for him to drink the tea. She ran some smelling salt under his nose and he slowly opened his eyes.

David felt as if he was drowning. He struggled for air and felt hot and suddenly he was back in his youth. It was a hot summer day and they were under their tree. Lying on his back on the blanket he revelled in the feeling of Michaela in his arms. He knew in the evening he would break her heart and the guilt he felt almost took his breath away. But it was like his father had said: life wasn't about love, life was about money. Smile and make money. Maybe he could convince her to see it the same way. He heard how she whispered his name and he slowly opened his eyes.

"Here you are." Her beautiful eyes looked at him. He gazed back but he couldn't find the radiance, he only saw deep sadness. _Had he already told her?_

"Mi…M'chela…" Why couldn't he speak?

"Sh, stay calm. Drink this, please. It will help you with the fever." He felt her hand on the back of his head and the hot fluid on his lips.

And it all came back. _Measles. He had caught the measles. Why hadn't he seen it? Business, right. _His thoughts stumbled. He felt…he felt… and he recognized the feeling. Fear. It rose from his toes and his fingertips like icy black water and gripped for his heart. His eyes went wide in terror and he implored, "Help me, Michaela, please!"

Towards dawn he felt a little bit better but he wasn't fooled. As a doctor he knew that a seeming improvement usually was followed by the next crisis. He had to tell her and searched for her eyes. "I want to hold your hand, please." Without hesitation she gave it to him. She already knew he had no chance and apparently he knew it as well.

"It broke my heart to tell you I would marry Catherine." She shook her head.

"David, don't…"

"I've never stopped loving you. You… have to know that. But business was more important. You can't be successful if you listen to your heart. I've had success. I didn't need a heart. But I've never stopped loving you." Exhausted he closed his eyes. "I've never stopped…"

During the next few hours his fever rose again. He didn't talk anymore. Michaela did all she could to make it easier for him.

And in the evening David Lewis was gone.

When Michaela arrived at the homestead Sully sat on the top step of the porch stair. She had to smile despite herself. Somehow she had known he wouldn't stay in bed without her pressing him. After she had taken care of her horse, she slowly stepped to him. "Shouldn't you welcome me in bed?"

As soon as the words were spoken she flushed heavily with embarrassment. "I…I mean…"

Sully chuckled. "No need to worry, Dr. Mike. I know what you meant." He pointed with his eyes at the spot next to him. "Sit with me for a moment? It's a wonderful night."

She sighed. Actually she was exhausted beyond all measure. But some fresh air and a friendly face would do no harm, so she sat down. For a while neither of them spoke and Michaela could feel how her nerves calmed down. When she started to shiver from cold and exhaustion Sully slid closer and put his arm around her shoulders.

"You alright?" His voice was tender. She wasn't used to someone really caring for her and so his sympathy almost made her let down her guard. That's why she only shook her head. Sully knew from experience the sooner she spoke the better it would be for her equilibrium. He gently squeezed her shoulder and his tone was low. "Tell me."

That was her undoing. The dam burst and all the bottled up emotions escaped her body through heavy sobs. He remembered he had seen her this way at an evening shortly after he had come back. He couldn't do anything then. But this time he was there for her. He made use of his other arm and held her even tighter, dismissing the pain in his chest. Stroking her hair he whispered words of comfort and rocked her gently. When he kissed first her temple and then lightly met her lips, it was only a part of his soothing actions and she thought nothing of it at the moment. Only later she would remember, reliving the feeling and asking herself if he had noticed what he had done.

Of course he had and it had felt wonderful. Her lips had been soft and warm and… He had had to summon up all his self-control to not go any further. Now he lay in bed, Hannah in his arms. He had offered Dr. Mike to sleep in the large bed, after all she hadn't slept comfortably for almost two weeks now. But she had refused to do so because he was the patient as she had said. The only compromise she would allow was that she at least had Hannah's bed for herself. She had been asleep the second her head had hit the pillow and he still didn't know what had happened in town during this evening. About all the other events he had been informed by Matthew and Maude. Maude, he had to smile when he remembered her reaction to his surprise for _her._ He couldn't wait until the next morning. With that thought he finally fell asleep.

Michaela woke up the next morning at dawn. She felt rested for the first time in weeks, but after that short good feeling the events from the day before were back on her mind. She didn't know what to expect. Would they actually accuse her of David's death? Would he still make her life miserable? She didn't want to think about David right now. She ached for holding Hannah in her arms again. Carefully she lifted her head to look over at the other bed, but she only saw the still sleeping little girl. Where was he? Her fingers unconsciously touched her lips. Noticing what she was doing she shook her head. She already had enough to deal with, she didn't need any added confusion. She rose from the bed and donned her robe. When she stepped out on the porch she was proved right. Sully sat on the top step again.

Hearing her he turned around and rose. "Slept well?"

"Yes, I did, thank you." She gave him a shy smile.

He didn't want her to feel uncomfortable around him but he couldn't stop himself touching her shoulder and carefully stroking his hand down her arm. "You alright?"

She sighed and knew it was useless to deny her problems. "David died last night and it is possible some people will blame me."

He took her hand and helped her down on the top step. "Why should they?"

She embraced her knees. "Hank had said, it would suit me well. I could go back to work now."

Sully nodded. He knew there were some stupid folks. He had to make sure they treated her right. But first he had to know what _she_ wanted. "Colleen told me you were about to leave. Do you still wanna do that?" He didn't dare look at her.

Without hesitation she replied, "I didn't want to do it in the first place. But I had no job and I have to earn my living. Actually I feel home here. Oh…" She blushed.

"That's alright. In fact, I'm relieved." Their gazes met and her blush deepened. "No need to worry, Dr. Mike. I will leave as soon as possible." Seeing alarm creeping into her eyes he hastily amended, "I mean I will leave the house to sleep somewhere else."

She nodded. "Oh, good." And then curiosity took over. "Where will you go? In my opinion it is far too soon for you to live outdoors again."

Tentatively he suggested, "I thought I could stay in the barn for a while." Cocking his head sidewards he waited for her reaction.

She didn't want him to see the involuntary smile that had appeared on her face. She looked down on her knees and cleared her throat. "I think that would be alright."

The blue in his eyes lit up, but before he could really enjoy her answer, a horse approached the homestead. It was Matthew.

"Dr. Mike, my Ma wants me to tell you that there more soldiers arrived in town this morning." They all knew what that meant. "And she said if you wanna go out to the reservation she would take care of the clinic until noon."

Michaela and Sully rose simultaneously. "Tell your mother I thank her for the offer. I'll be back as soon as I can."

Matthew turned and rode back towards town. Michaela noticed Sully's determined face. She frowned and asked, "We won't have the same discussion again, will we?"

He groaned impatiently and she softened. "Sully, I'll go and find out about their situation and then we both can decide in which way we can help, alright?"

He didn't want to agree yet. "But they might need me!"

"To do what, Sully? You should have the good sense to see that you can do nothing physically!" But when it occurred to her that he only wanted to see a special person she paused for a moment. Then she quietly said, "If you want to see her badly, I could ask to bring her here." She turned to enter the house but he reached for her arm.

"Wait. You're right. I can't do anything out there now. And I assure you the only one I'd like to see is Cloud Dancing. But he has more important things on his mind right now than to pay me a visit ." When she didn't react he softly added, "And I want you to know, Flying Sun is only a friend."

She glanced at him and he could tell that she didn't believe him. But there was no time at the moment to discuss that further. And his surprise had to wait as well. He sighed. "You should hurry," was all he said to end their talk.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 17 

When Michaela approached the reservation, she was stopped by an army patrol. The soldiers weren't exactly polite and only after she had convinced them that she was hardly able to smuggle guns in her medical bag, she had been allowed to go on. But the Indians were even less friendly. They halted her on the edge of the village, pulled her down from Bear and dragged her in the direction of the central fire place. Two young braves were tugging on her bag when Cloud Dancing emerged from his teepee, looking for the reason of the commotion. As soon as he recognized it was Dr. Mike he sharply spoke some words in Cheyenne. Instantly the men let her go.

The medicine man stepped closer. "I apologize for their behavior. But we have been treated very badly by the white men lately."

Michaela felt how shame rose inside her. While she tried to re-arrange her clothes, she looked the Indian in the eyes and spoke with sincerity, "_I_ apologize. I came to ask if you need…uhm, if you want help." She didn't break their locked gazes.

Cloud Dancing had known from the moment he had first talked to her, that she was special. The smile he wouldn't let be seen reached his eyes. "The spirits must have heard me. Chief Black Kettle is wounded. The bullet is near his spine. I cannot get it out."

He led her to the Chief's teepee. With a gesture he asked her to wait and stepped inside. Looking around, Michaela noticed that all eyes were on her. Before she could feel uncomfortable, Cloud Dancing called her in.

Seeing the poor condition the patient was in, the doctor immediately sprang into action. Fortunately she had brought some medical supplies with her. "Would you bring me my saddlebags, please?" Still examining Black Kettle, she only glanced at the medicine man.

He nodded and left the teepee, outside almost running into Flying Sun. The only thing the woman wanted to know was, "Where is Sully?"

When Cloud Dancing didn't react and only quickly went to Dr. Mike's horse, she ran after him and impatiently demanded, "Did you not ask her?"

But again the man didn't pay attention to her. Flying Sun felt the rejection and that she was left out. Growing angry she promised herself she would make her presence known.

It took Michaela more than an hour to operate on the Chief; but when she finished securing the bandage on Black Kettle's back she sighed with relief. "I think he will make it." Her smile was tired but sincere.

Cloud Dancing's admiration was obviously written on his face. "Thank you, Dr. Mike."

But she felt she didn't deserve gratitude. She shook her head, "You don't need to thank me. It's the least I could do."

When they stepped out of the teepee they were awaited by seeming all Indians of the village. Michaela couldn't help it, but she felt threatened. Sensing her discomfort, the medicine man took one more step forward and started to speak in Cheyenne. Suddenly all eyes went to the white woman, but now Michaela only saw gazes in wonder. She blushed slightly and looked down at her feet. After Cloud Dancing had finished his speech, the Indians reluctantly went back to their different tasks.

"Now tell me about my brother. How is he?" The medicine man turned back to her and expectantly raised his eyebrows.

While Snowbird joined them, Michaela thought about how to break the news to them. She took a deep breath and decided to tell them frankly. "He is almost well now. He was shot when he tried to protect me. He is…"

She couldn't finish because now Flying Sun came from behind the teepee, exclaiming incredulously, "He is shot because of you?"

This time Snowbird intervened. The medicine man's wife angrily told her something in Cheyenne and the young woman left without another word.

Cloud Dancing shook his head, "Do not let her bother you, Dr. Mike. Now, tell us what happened." So she did.

Before Michaela left the village, the medicine man informed her about the last incidents and the upcoming negotiation. He led her to the tents with other injured or sick Indians. There were a lot of them and she made notes as to what she would need when she returned later. Of course she examined Little Blackbird, too. She was concerned, the girl was much worse now. She frowned and wrote in her notebook what she should get for the child. She was startled, when Flying Sun started to speak right behind her. "Dr. Mike, I want you to give this to Sully. He knows what it means." She handed the white woman the dream catcher which Sully had given her back after his vision quest.

"I'll give it to him." Michaela was beginning to feel uneasy about her, but she smiled nevertheless. She left the teepee and felt relief, taking a deep breath in the fresh December air.

Sully sat on the top step of the porch stair again and watched his daughter play with Wolf. The girl had found a stick which she threw away with great effort and the wolf ran after it to bring it back to her. They both enjoyed their play very much. Hannah was giggling all the time and the animal seemed to be happy to finally run and jump again. Although Wolf could move around freely, he had stayed near the homestead the last few weeks. Sully sighed. He longed for a long walk, too. Thinking about his abandoned traps and the lean-tos he suddenly noticed that something had changed. Before he had left with the Cheyenne, he had felt restless. But that feeling was gone. Yes, he needed to be outdoors, but he didn't long for solitude anymore. He smiled, thinking that a terrible event like being shot had turned into the opportunity to get his life on the right track again.

When he heard an approaching horse, he called for his daughter, gave her the last instructions and made her sit down next to him.

Finally, she rode into the yard. Sully could barely hold Hannah back when Michaela dismounted her horse. When he saw that she didn't get ready to bring Bear into the barn he shouted, "You ain't have to go to town right now, you can bring him inside!"

She turned to him and shaking her head she replied, "I'll have to."

After tethering the horse she stepped towards father and daughter and raised an eyebrow when neither of them made a move. She directed her gaze at the child. "I thought at least a hug were in order?"

Now Hannah slid to and fro and looked at her Pa pleadingly. He had to smile and nodded, "But sh!" He put his index finger on his lips. "Don't tell yet."

The girl shook her head and a moment later she was with Dr. Mike. Michaela bent down and after a very tight embrace she lifted the child in her arms. "You are heavy, what did you eat when I wasn't here?" They smiled at each other, happy to be finally together again.

Sully cleared his throat. "Grace brought us lunch, it's waiting inside."

But Michaela had to disappoint him. "I'm afraid I have to go into town right now…"

He interrupted her. "But Grace said there were no sick people at all this morning."

"Sully, I have to go. I have to get supplies from the clinic and then go back to the reservation."

Now she had his attention. "What happened to them?"

Michaela contemplated how much to tell him in front of little ears because it was obvious, that Hannah wouldn't let go of her. "Custer found them the day before they reached the winter camp. He forced them to come back here. Two days before they arrived, dog soldiers tried to free them. There are some injured men in the village. This morning I removed a bullet from Black Kettle's back near his spine."

Sully cut her off. "Is he alright?"

She nodded. "I believe he will make it. But I have to go back to get some quinine, ointments and bandages. And of course there are the people who were already sick before they left. Most of them are even worse now, like Little Blackbird. Oh, that reminds me…"

She searched in her coat pocket and produced the dream catcher out of it. "She told me you would know what it means." Michaela couldn't explain it, but she didn't want to speak her name.

Blushing in embarrassment she averted her eyes from Sully and he sighed in exasperation. "It means nothing to me and she knows that." He didn't want the moment and the upcoming surprise to be spoiled.

When Hannah reached for the item he gave it to her. "Let's see it as a toy for Hannah before we can give it back."

The following silence was slightly uncomfortable, but Sully was determined to see these beautiful eyes lightening up again. He cleared his throat and gave his daughter a wink. The girl immediately paid all her attention to him and nodded eagerly, putting the new toy away into the pocket of her apron.

Michaela looked suspiciously back and forth between them, though she couldn't suppress a little smile. It seemed they already had secrets they wanted to keep from her."What is it?"

Sully stepped closer to take Hannah in his arms. "Sully, I think it's too soon for you to lift…"

"Just for once, please." When she tried to object he quickly went on.

"We wanted to ask you a question." Father and daughter looked at each other, both grinning. When they directed their gazes back to her, Michaela was stunned. It was amazing how similar they looked.

Sully felt his knees weaken. What if she didn't say yes? "You do love Hannah, right?"

Michaela had no clue where this was leading. "Of course I do. Why are you asking me that?"

Without answering he continued. "Do you still wanna teach her things, be with her, watch her grow up?"

Tentatively she replied, "I would love to." She still didn't know what to make of it.

Sully could finally breathe again. "Then Hannah has something she wanna tell you."

The girl hadn't even waited for this; she already had bent towards the woman she loved more than anything in the whole world. Now she lifted a strand of the long auburn hair to find the ear beneath and whispered only one word in it.

"Mommy."

Michaela's heart skipped a beat. With a flowing movement she took the girl from her father and clutched the child to her chest. "Oh my God, Hannah!"

Her eyes were moist when she searched the man's gaze. "Are you sure about this?"

Sully beamed. "As sure as one can be. She will call you Ma."

She hesitated."I don't know, Sully. What if you were to get married some day? Your wife…"

He laid his hand on her arm to stop her. "Remember what ya've told Maude when we talked to her after the heart attack? You said, _it's up to her father to find her a mother_. Well, and I did it." And if he had his way, he had found his future wife as well. But of course he couldn't tell her that right now. It was too soon.

Later they sat together at the table, though it hadn't been easy to convince her to take at least a little break; but after Sully had asked her if she immediately was needed back at the reservation, she had given in. Lunch was already finished but Sully still couldn't wipe the smile from his face while Michaela couldn't stop the trembling of her hands. He had told her how he had used his wedding picture to explain his daughter about her mother in Heaven and her mother on earth. Michaela barely dared think about all the consequences. Did he really know what he had done? Now she would be a constant in his daughter's life. And with that, in his life as well. Was he only looking for a mother for his child or did he have any intentions to stay close to her not only as a friend? She glanced at him and when she found his gaze on her, she blushed. She wasn't sure if she was ready for so many feelings, but it seemed she had lost control about her emotions anyway.

While the adults were talking, Hannah's little mind worked hard. She had a Pa _and_ a Ma now. Ma and Pa. Dr. Mike had told her once that her Ma and her Pa loved each other and that's why they had a little girl, her. That meant, a Ma and a Pa were in love. People in love are supposed to kiss. But Dr. Mike and her Pa hadn't kissed yet. Maybe Dr. Mike didn't know how to do it, because it was new for her to be a Ma. She could show her, she had seen how Ingrid was kissing Matthew when they had watched her. That was good. She lifted her head and told them the result of her thinking.

"Ma 'n Pa kiss!"

Michaela froze in her place for a moment and Sully loved his daughter even more for her thinking. When her new Ma didn't make a move, Hannah climbed down from her chair and scampered to her Pa. When she stood in front of him, she made Dr. Mike look at her by explaining, "So, Ma." She framed her father's face with the little hands and made sure she knew where his mouth was. Then she squeezed her eyes tightly, pouted her lips and tried to meet her father's mouth. When she succeeded in her effort, she lingered there and gave off a humming, "Hmmm!"

Sully couldn't help it, but he had to chuckle heavily. Michaela's cheeks were almost crimson now and her embarrassment knew no bounds. "Hannah…"

But the little girl was serious. "Pease…Ma?" Her blue eyes pleaded and under this gaze Michaela gave in.

Raising her eyebrows apologetically she bent towards him. She remembered too well how his lips had felt on hers and her heartbeat quickened. Sully only smiled reassuringly and met her halfway. For the split second their lips touched it was as if they merged into one another. He didn't want the sensation to end. If she was honest, she didn't want it either. Hannah was satisfied. They had kissed; maybe she would get a brother or sister now. She liked the idea. She should tell them and blurted out, "Now w'get baby."

But before Michaela or Sully could reply, loud voices from outside startled them. Stepping on the porch they saw an angry, drunken Hank who cursed out loud and Loren and Jake who tried to reason with him.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 18 

"Sully, I don't want Hannah to be frightened, would you please bring her inside again and stay with her?" Without waiting for his reply she turned to the men in the yard.

His look followed her before he entered the house with his daughter. And of course he returned some moments later. With his arms crossed in front of his chest he leant against the outside wall of the homestead and watched the scene.

Stepping down the porch stairs Michaela directed her words to Loren, "Would you please tell me what's going on?"

Loren and Jake had already dismounted their horses and were standing now next to Hank who still was struggling to free himself from the stirrups. They were ready to catch him in case he would fall in his drunken state. "Aw, Dr. Mike! Hank here has just gotten a telegram from the bank in Denver this morning about his business money with David. And since you've gotta be involved there, too…"

Hank had finally managed to get onto the ground and trying to steady his standing position he cursed. "Damned woman! I knew it from the beginning! I should have…"

With that he ran out of steam and slumped down. The only thing the two other men could do was to make sure he wouldn't hurt himself .

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Loren!" Michaela looked at him questioningly.

"Ehm, Dr. Mike?" It was Horace. She hadn't even noticed he was there. Touching the rim of his hat to greet her the telegraph operator slightly bowed and gave her a folded piece of paper. "That one came for you this morning. I thought you would come to town, that's why I didn't deliver it immediately. I'm sorry, Dr. Mike." Again slightly bowing he stepped back.

Jake was impatient. "What does it say?"

"Aw, let her read it first!" But Loren was curious, too. "What does it say, Dr. Mike?" His face was full of expectation.

Michaela chuckled. "It's like you said, I'll have to read it."

Much to the dismay of all the men in the yard she did it silently. When she was ready and didn't speak yet, Jake lost his patience completely. "Now you've read it. What is it about?"

Michaela was startled when she heard Sully's voice because she thought he was inside. "That's none of your business, Jake."

Turning around to him she said disbelievingly, "They want to talk to me about the inheritance David left me."

There was a stunned silence when each of them tried to grasp the news.

Sully was the first who found his voice again. "You won't take his money, will you?"

Without hesitation she replied, "Of course not!" And then she added, "But I'll have to see the banker and the lawyer who will come tomorrow morning from Denver."

The next morning, Michaela felt rested because she had finally slept in her own bed again. Earlier she had given Hannah into Maude's care. Now sitting at her desk and awaiting the arrival of the stagecoach from Denver her thoughts wandered back. Sully had moved into the barn the night before. She admitted feeling relieved about that. Of course he was still a patient but, in the meantime, a very lively one. The last couple of days she had felt his looks when she had changed into her nightgown behind the curtain or when she had brushed her hair. Although, or maybe because, they had become closer, she felt an uneasy mix of intruding her private sphere and excitement about his interest.

When she finally heard the stagecoage approaching she put the thoughts about Sully in the back of her mind and stepped out on the clinic porch.

There she immediately heard the bar keeper threaten her again, "You better know whatcha do, M'chaela. If you're gonna ruin my business, you will regret that."

"Nothing has changed since the moment I arrived this morning, Hank. I'm not interested in your business." Without giving him a chance to reply she walked towards the mercantile where the first passangers were getting off. When finally two men, wearing expensive suits and hats of the latest fashion, emerged she knew that had to be the gentlemen she awaited. They were looking around and spotting her, they stepped closer.

The taller one with an infectious smile shook her hand. "Preston A. Lodge, the third. I'm one of the owners of the First National Bank in Denver. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Dr. Michaela Quinn. I've understood you have something to discuss with me." She felt slightly uncomfortable when she noticed how he stared at her.

The second man cleared his throat. "Madam, may I introduce myself. My name is Henry Goldt, I'm Mr. Lewis' lawyer." He shook her hand as well.

Michaela took a deep breath. "Well, I would suggest we go into the clinic to discuss everything." She was about to turn around to take the lead when Mr. Goldt stopped her.

"Excuse me madam, but I have to admit, I'm starving. Is there any place where we could talk and I could drink something at least?"

Michaela immediately replied, "Of course, what must you think of me. I apologize. We could go to Grace's Café and take a table there."

Usually the café wasn't crowded at this hour, but today at least the men of the town seemed to be very thirsty. Jake and Hank had taken a table within earshot of Michaela and her visitors. Loren and even the reverend were all ears as well at the table next to them. Michaela sighed. She would had prefered some privacy, but since she had no intention to accept anything from David it didn't seem to matter at all. She lay her hands one on top of the other on the table in front of her. "Gentlemen, I'm listening."

Mr. Lodge couldn't take his eyes off of her. _What a beautiful sight!_ _She should sit in an adequate house with enough servants to read every wish from her eyes and a husband who_…Her voice had interrupted his trail of thoughts.

Showing one of his broadest smiles he began. "Dr. Lewis deposited his money in our bank to invest it in a project of a new hotel in Colorado Springs. Since we are interested in that matter as well, we offer you all our knowledge to manage the account so that the plans can be realized with a generous share of profit for you." The radiance of his smile knew no bounds and so he was taken aback when Michaela replied, "Well, that's very nice of you, Mr. Lodge, but I'm not interested in Dr. Lewis' money."

"But you should, because we are talking about several thousands of dollars here." A collective gasp from the eavesdroppers was heard.

When he saw her still shaking her head he continued, "You would have nothing to do, the money would work for you. But if you refuse it, the First National Bank of Denver will retire from the project, too. The only partner who would remain can't offer enough securities. But of course if you don't want the money at all…"

Now Mr. Goldt joined the talk. "Dr. Quinn, if you don't succeed to the estate of Dr. Lewis, all the money will go to the bank." With this he had her attention. "Dr. Lewis came to me on Friday evening because he was feeling sick. He must have known that he could die. He told me that he was sure you would refuse his inheritance, so he asked me to give you that."

He reached a sealed envelop across the table.

Michaela hesitated. She had no idea what to await. Tentatively she took the letter, opened it and started to read.

When she arrived at the homestead two hours later, Sully was outside practising throwing his tomahawk against the door of the barn. Dismounting Bear she told him, "You shouldn't overdo it, Sully."

He rubbed his chest and admitted, "It's still hurting."

"Of course it is, it's been only two weeks since I had to open your chest."

He swallowed and secured the tool on his belt. Suddenly noticing that she didn't intend to stay he frowned. "What's going on?"

She sighed. "I'm sorry, I can't have lunch with you. Before I'll go to the reservation I have to return to town for David's funeral…"

He incredulously interrupted her. "You're gonna go to his funeral, after all he did to you? How can you?"

While she was still contemplating if he should be the first she would let into her plans, his mind had worked, too. He raised his voice, "Don't tell me you're gonna take his money?"

Growing angry she replied, "You don't know the facts, Sully. I…"

He cut her off. "You couldn't resist, right? Tell me, how much money is it that you changed your mind?"

Briskly turning away from him and rushing towards the house she didn't deign to answer him.

After changing into black clothes, she came out again and passed Sully without looking at him. He still paced the yard and tried to control his emotions. Only after she had mounted Bear, she glanced down. "I'll be back within an hour."

At the graveyard Michaela was the only one with the Reverend to pay the last respects to Dr. David Lewis. After the clergy man had left her alone she still stood there for some minutes.

_Tell me, David, is it worse to believe you when you said you loved me but the love wasn't important enough for your stay? Or is it worse you never loved me and I only was too foolish not to see it? Is it worse not being loved or not being worth to live with, despite the love? I'm only here because I believe that you at least showed me your respect in the end of your life by giving me the money you loved so badly with the knowledge that I will spend it in a way you would never have chosen. Rest in peace, David_.

Michaela took a deep breath and turned around to walk towards her horse. She never looked back.

Sully had insisted in coming with her to the reservation. Not because he wanted to accompany her, but he needed to see Cloud Dancing. He still was furious with her and didn't say a word.

When they arrived in the village he hopped down from the wagon. Spotting him, Flying Sun immediately rushed towards him. She clung on to his neck, exclaiming, "I'm so glad to see you!"

Sully chuckled. "It would be nice if you let me breathe again."

Looking over to Michaela he noticed how several Indians welcomed her. He saw his brother helping her down and leading her to Black Kettle's teepee, so he let Flying Sun drag him to her tent.

When Michaela and the medicine man reached the teepee, Black Kettle appeared outside. He was wrapped in the flag President Lincoln had given him. All the Indians stood in respect and silence seeing the Chief for the first time again after he had had his operation. The wise man halted in front of the white woman. Enveloping her hands in his he started to speak, emphasizing his words with several nods of his head. When he ended his speech, Cloud Dancing translated. "We thank you for all what you have done for us. Thank you for saving my life. Thank you for giving us hope. We are of different nations but we are one people. From now on you will be known as Medicine Woman."

Deeply moved, Michaela gazed at the Chief and spoke her first words in Cheyenne, "Ha ho." She received a pleased smile in response.

After seeing several patients, the last one would be Little Blackbird. Entering her teepee she saw Sully sitting cross-legged next to the girl with the Indian woman by his side. Flying Sun had placed her hand possessively on his thigh. Following Michaela's look Sully glanced down and removed the hand he hadn't even noticed was there. When he searched for Dr. Mike's gaze, he didn't succeed because all of the doctor's attention was now on the girl. So he watched her at work. First she listened with her stethoscope and then she tapped the child's chest. Obviously, what she was hearing alarmed her.

Michaela sighed and stroked the girls hair. "You know what will come now, do you?" The child smiled back, not understanding one word but knowing the white woman always made her feel better.

"What's wrong, Dr. Mike?" Sully rose and so did Flying Sun.

"She has fluid in her lungs. I have to aspirate it. You should wait outside, both of you. And tell Cloud Dancing I'll need a basin." She sure was curt.

Neither of them moved. Michaela shook her head and started to get up when the medicine man entered the tent. She repeated her request and Cloud Dancing immediately left again. While Michaela was waiting for his return, she prepared her instruments. She bent towards the girl gently touching her cheek and told her, "I'm sorry it will hurt. But I can't get ice here to numb the area where I have to insert the needle."

Hearing the word "hurt" and seeing the large syringe Flying Sun angrily approached the white woman. "You will not hurt my sister!"

Michaela only glanced at her. "Why don't you wait outside like I suggested. Sully?"

She hoped for his help but he had his difficulties, too. "Are you sure this is necessary? I mean, she is a little girl and this isa reallylarge syringe…" _In very small hands_, he only added in his mind. Of course he knew she was a doctor and that she had even done operations, but all he had seen so far was how she had used her stethoscope or applied ointments. He had only noticed at this moment how fragile she seemed to be, how small her hands looked. But her eyes were full of fire when she was shooting him a furious look.

"Why don't you take your _friend _outside and let me do my work? I'm a doctor, remember. I know what I'm doing!"

Hearing her last words Cloud Dancing returned. Flying Sun instantly turned to him. "I will not allow her…"

But with him she came to the wrong person. He sternly gave her a speech in Cheyenne which made her hang her head down and leave the tent. Sully, stunned by the lecture and hearing the news, stayed and asked in the Indian's language, "Does Dr. Mike know he calls his wife the same?"

Cloud Dancing had to smile and shook his head.

In the meantime Michaela was already working. She had sprayed the area between the ribs of the girl's back with carbolic acid and now she was injecting the syringe. Then she moved the plunger. Seeing the fluid appearing Sully hissed through clenched teeth but he didn't turn away. He admired Dr. Mike's quick but sincere movements and silently scolded himself for his behaviour earlier. It seems he had to apologize once again. He only hoped she would accept it.

After she was done with her work, Cloud Dancing approached her. "We would be glad if you can stay longer. Snowbird and I want to celebrate with you."

Michaela blushed in embarrassment. "I would really like that, but unfortunately there will be a town's meeting this evening I had requested for. But if you don't mind I could stay tomorrow."

The medicine man smiled reassuringly. "We understand that. Then we will celebrate tomorrow."

When Michaela walked to the wagon she noticed Sully still standing with his brother. She wasn't sure if he would come back with her, if she was honest, she didn't even know if she wanted it. When she saw that Indian woman approach the two men she dismissed him from her mind and climbed onto the driver's seat.

Noticing her action out of the corner of his eye Sully shouted across the place, "Dr. Mike, wait!"

He hastily said good bye to his friend, only nodded at Flying Sun and rushed towards the wagon.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 19 

They drove in silence. Michaela had refused to let him have the reins, so he could do nothing but try to steady himself in the seat. From time to time he glanced at her. She didn't seem to notice it. Or she didn't want to. Finally he plucked up the courage to talk to her. "I'm sorry, Dr. Mike. I shouldn't have acted the way I did."

She didn't look at him. "That's nothing new for me, that people think I'm not capable to do my job. In fact, I'm used to it. I just didn't expect it from you."

He sighed. "If you're mad at me, then tell me. I can stand that because it'd be better than this silence." Now he let his gaze linger on her, hoping she would return it. But she didn't do him the favor.

But at least she answered. "I'm not mad, Sully. Disappointed maybe. Like I said, it's nothing new." She shrugged.

He had enough. He grasped the reins to bring the wagon to a halt. When they finally stood still, he turned in his seat towards her. "Look at me, Michaela."

She slightly winced when he used her first name. But she was ready to face him. So she turned and her gaze fell straight into his eyes. He had expected signs of sulk or stubbornness or anything else like that. But he only saw that she knew she was right. He had never met a woman like her before, not because she was beautiful and caring and kind. Abigail had been all that as well. He still couldn't grasp it. But it made his heart flutter like a butterfly enclosed in the cage of his chest.

Finally she spoke. "I could have used your help out there."

He knew he should have supported her. After all she had done for him, his daughter and the Indians, he _had_ doubted her. And again, he was caught off guard when there was no reproach or maybe even triumph when he could sense that she felt him admitting he had failed her. Still holding her gaze he told her without words that he would make it up to her.

Slightly blushing she raised an eyebrow and simply asked, "Shall we drive?"

And he gave her back the reins.

Hank had done his best to impress the banker. He had offered him his finest whiskey, but the toff had refused it, "Not in the middle of the day, my good man."

Then he had tried to convince him with the facts and even showed him the plans the bank didn't know yet. Nothing. Only when he had taken him out to the hot springs he felt he had gotten through to him.

Preston A. Lodge, the third recognized a chance when he saw it. He smiled, taking in the fresh air and the beautiful landscape. "The Hot Springs Health Resort," he exclaimed, spreading out his arms.

"What?" Hank was flustered, maybe this guy was flipping out because he was not used being outdoors. He had to bring him back into town.

But Preston was thrilled by his idea. "Don't you see it? Here shouldn't just be a hotel, we could make the area into a health resort like that Davos-Platz in Switzerland, with a hotel and swimming-pools using the water from the hot springs. And of course with a clinic, we could ask Dr. Quinn to manage it. If we do so, she might become interested in the project. We will still need her money."

But Hank knew Michaela would never accept that. "If you see all the profit, why ain't you interested? Ya sure look like a man with money."

Nothing could restrain a Preston smile. "My friend, I'm flattered, but unfortunately I've invested my money otherwise. We will need Dr. Quinn."

"Then ya shoud say good bye to your plan, unless we can find another way to kick her out. Maybe I have an idea…" Hank smirked. He would beat her at her own game.

After a short knock at the clinic door, Preston entered the examining room. In his suit, still looking as if it was freshly pressed, he seemed to be out of the place. His leather boots shone like they had been polished a minute ago. With a pleasant smile and an outstretched hand he stepped towards Michaela who was sitting behind her desk.

She acknowledged his presence and nodded at him, "Mr. Lodge."

"It's Preston. I believe we should be introduced more personally. May I call you Michaela?" Without giving her the possibility to reply he shook her hand and continued talking. "It is such a wonderful name for a beautiful woman."

Not being impressed in the least she cut him off. "What do you want, Mr. Lodge?"

Slightly taken aback by her frank request, his broad smile faded slightly. "I'd like to show you the opportunity of your life; a new, well equipped clinic at the Hot Springs Health Resort of Colorado Springs. How does that sound?"

Michaela was amused about his obvious try to make his plans palatable to her. "Well, that sounds great for someone who is interested. But not for me, Mr. Lodge. I already have a clinic to manage."

Preston looked around provocatively. "You call _this _a clinic? I would say…"

"_I_ would say I have to go now. The town meeting is starting in ten minutes." With that she rose from her chair, took her coat from the hook next to the door, put it on, opened the clinic door to show a stunned Mr. Lodge out.

Holding his daughter's hand Sully stood on the porch of the mercantile. He saw Michaela and a man he hadn't seen yet appearing from inside the clinic. Hannah excitedly tugged at his hand and tried to drag him towards her. "Pa look, Ma!"

But her father didn't budge. The girl was puzzled. She hadn't seen her Ma all day and now she couldn't wait to get to her. Why didn't her Pa want the same? She looked up at him and pleaded, "Pease!"

Sully crouched down beside her. "Look, your Ma is gonna go to a meeting. It's really important to her and we shouldn't disturb her. I don't like these meetings anyway, so how about going home?"

Hannah couldn't believe it. There was something important for her Ma? Then they had to go all the more! She placed her free hand on her father's shoulder, looked in his eyes and explained seriously, "'Potant, we go!"

Sully had to smile, _she already spoke like Mi…Dr. Mike_. He thought he should watch his tongue more. When he had used her first name he had seen her reaction. He sighed and told his daughter, "Alright, but we're gonna take the wagon because I still ain't able to carry you and it's a long way for a little girl. Right?"

Hannah only nodded eagerly and pulled him in the direction of the livery where the wagon was waiting for them.

The church was already crowded when Michaela entered the room. She went straight towards the table where the members of the town council had taken place. Hank sat in the first pew next to the aisle. Preston and Mr. Goldt were his neighbors. When Michaela reached the pulpit, she turned around to face the crowd. Standing straight she clasped her hands in front of her. Maude, sitting behind Hank, was astonished seeing her so calm. Finally the Reverend noticed Dr. Mike standing there, ready to begin.

"Everybody, quiet please!" he pounded the gavel on the top of the table.

Slowly the noise ceased. "Dr. Mike had asked for this meeting. Dr. Mike…" He turned towards her, nodded and she took over.

"I'm sure you all know about the plan for a new hotel in Colorado Springs and you also know that Dr. Lewis' money would be needed to realize it. Well, I believe I should spend the money in a different way."

Instantly Hank shot up from his seat. "You're not gonna decide that, you have no idea about business at all!"

People weren't silent anymore. Nobody noticed Sully and Hannah entering the church. Spotting her grandma the girl asked her father to let her go to her. Sully only nodded, pushed her affectionately towards Maude and leant against the wall in the back of the church.

"You are wrong Hank, I _can_ decide what will happen with the money and if you sit down again, I will tell you."

Hank saw his hopes vanishing into thin air and raised his voice. "You will sit, Michaela!" He emphasized every syllable of her name. "I've already wired the marshal, he will arrest you!"

She wasn't concerned. "Arrest me for what, Hank? For spending the money in a way you don't like?"

"He will arrest you for murder!" The crowd gasped. "And then they send you to prison where ya belong!" He was almost screaming now.

Hannah had been wondering all the time why Mr. Lawson was so mean to her Ma and why there wasn't anybody helping her. So she wiggled down from her grandma's lap, took three steps forward and tugged at the angry man's trousers. "No yellin' Ma! Dad's mean!"

Her voice was clearly heard in the room and some people felt ashamed that a child had to say what most of them knew to be true.

Hank looked down at the little girl he silently had enclosed in his heart. Slightly lowering his tone he demanded, "Someone oughta take that child from my leg!"

Michaela was already there and bent down. Stroking the blond hair she told Hannah, "Thank you for your help sweetheart, I really appreciate that. But please sit down with your grandma again. Alright?"

The girl nodded and climbed back on Maude's lap. Michaela smiled reassuringly at both of them and went back to her place next to the pulpit.

Preston A. Lodge the third was disgusted. This was neither the way a woman like _her _should be treated nor the way to talk about such an important business. So he rose from his seat and hissed at Hank, "Sit down, you will ruin it! I'll take over!"

Plastering a radiant smile on his face he turned to the crowd. "My good people, I'm sure if you knew all of the facts you would agree that a health resort is a splendid idea for Colorado Springs." He dismissed the starting murmuring.

"All of you would make your profit because there would be more people visiting your lovely town. They would buy things at the mercantile, eat at the café or need a haircut. And in the new clinic Michaela could…"

Hearing her name Sully frowned. Where they already as close that…But her voice set him right. "It's Dr. Quinn, Mr. Lodge. And I'm absolutely capable to reason that problem out by myself."

She directed her speech to all persons present again. "I know that the business men of this town would be profiting from the hotel. But I have something on my mind that will let all of you win. I'm only here because I'll have to know if you agree with my idea. If not, I'll think about something else."

She had everyone's attention by now and Preston slowly sat down again. Especially all the women were expectantly. The doctor had told them that she needed their presence. Taking a deep breath she finally told them. "I believe the children of our town are the future of this town. That is why I intend to give a school to our children."

First there was stunned silence. Then the murmuring set in again and Jake asked, "So, how much profit would you make from the money the parents will have to pay that their children can learn there?"

Michaela turned to him, "You are talking like a true business man, Jake. But I assure you," and she spoke to all of them again, "I'm not interested in any profit from Dr. Lewis' money. The school will be free for all children, you won't have to pay for the books or any other material. We will pay the teacher and I will invest in a fund that will be used for children who want to continue their education when they leave our school. We have to set a committee that will decide who will get a scholarship. But of course first we have to build the schoolhouse. What do you think?"

It was obvious, all the women in the room were enthusiastic. But most of the men were still unsure. Mr. Deaver rose from his seat and stroked his hair back nervously. "I don't understand that, Dr. Mike. We, including me, treated you terribly as long as Dr. Lewis was in town. Why are you doing this? Where is the snag?"

Michaela had to hide a smile. "There is no snag, Mr. Deaver. Like Hank said, I'm not a business woman. I'm not looking for benefit. And why I am doing this? I've come to love this town and there are still some people who don't want me to leave." Now she smiled openly. "So I'll stay. I want the town to be a good place to raise Hannah. A place where we look out for each other and teach our children not only how to count but also how to forgive and get along with each other no matter what happened in the past or if we have different opinions. So, what do you think about a school?"

Now single comments were heard. "Wonderful idea!"

"Can you imagine…!"

"That would be so great!"

And finally the Reverend shouted, "Quiet, please. I think we owe Dr. Mike not just an answer." The room grew silent again. "To sum it up, it can be said we are delighted by your plan, Dr. Mike. You will never know how thankful we are."

Michaela beamed. "Oh, you can show it by helping me to find an architect for the schoolhouse."

Now a deep voice came from the back of the room. "I'll do it."

"Sully?" Michaela was incredulous.

And instantly, Hank was there with his comment. "There you can see it, she claims she don't wanna take the money but she gives it to him, that means in the end it comes back to her." He gave a sarcastic laugh.

"I ain't taking money." It was Sully again. Surprised all heads turned in his direction. Everybody knew he didn't have a regular job, so he could use the payment.

Feeling all gazes on him he asked impatiently, "What? Can't a man do something on principle? A school is a great idea. I don't wanna be paid for helping to build it. You can take the architect's money for something else."

Now there was only one gaze he still felt. _Hers._ He looked back at her and suddenly he sensed a connection between them he had never known before in his whole life. It was as if two hawks had met to soar in the sky together.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 20 

Standing near the exit, Sully received more attention than he wanted when people finally left the church. While the looks from the women were appreciative, the men mostly expressed that they thought him a fool. How could he waste such an opportunity to earn a large amount of money!

Hank hissed in passing, "You're gonna regret that, I swear. Think of my words!"

After Michaela had talked to Mr. Goldt for a few minutes she joined the group with Maude, Charlotte and Colleen. Letting go all her reserve Charlotte's daughter excitedly tugged at Dr. Mike's sleeve and looked at her wide-eyed, "Does that mean I can go to college now and be a doctor, too?"

"If this is what you want, of course." Michaela had to chuckle about the girl's eagerness. "The only thing you have to do is to learn as much as possible." Reaching for Hannah, who was almost sleeping now in her grandma's arms, Michaela asked the other women somewhat unsure, "Do you think Sully will…?"

She was interrupted by Loren. "Aw, don't you worry, Dr. Mike. Sully had helped build a lot of cabins after he had married Abigail. He had built the homestead all by himself." After a short hesitation he added, "I was wondering, ehm…where will you buy all the supplies for the building?" _If she would order all things at his mercantile_…He couldn't contain his excitement.

"All things that are needed will be ordered from you. I want only people of our town to be involved in the whole process of building the school."

Now some eavesdroppers stepped closer. "Does that mean you will hire all the workers here, too?" It was Mr. Deaver who had asked.

Turning to him the doctor assured. "Yes, it does. But it doesn't mean I will hire you, this lies in Mr. Sully's responsibility."

Sully had waited patiently and now they were finally on their way home. This time she had asked him if he wanted to take the reins. He had to smile when he remembered that she almost seemed to be shy doing so. Sitting now side by side on the driver's bench of the wagon he sensed that she didn't dare ask him why he had volunteered to be the architect. He cleared his throat and turned his head to her. "I don't know how often I already had to apologize to you for jumping to wrong conclusions and I hope this time will be the last one. I'll show you that I can make things better. In fact I love building homesteads. You only have to tell me what youwant."

Relieved, she returned his smile and started to explain her plan.

While she put Hannah to bed, he made a sketch of her dream. He stood next the to table when she stepped back to him. Seeing his drawing she breathed, "Oh Sully, it's beautiful!"

She hadn't expected him bringing to paper exactly what she had in her mind. With teary eyes she looked up at him, and now he was surprised because without a warning, she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. "Thank you!" he heard her whisper. He held her close and didn't want to let her go.

The next few weeks went by quickly. After Michaela had signed the papers Mister Goldt had prepared, Mister Lodge had given up trying to convince her. But he had assured her he wouldn't give up his plan of his health resort. The marshal from Denver, who had actually arrived on the morning after the town meeting, had been very angry at Hank when he found out that there was no evidence against Dr. Quinn at all. And Michaela's patients came back, tentatively first, because most of them were ashamed at how they had treated her, but steadily. Sully was almost healthy again and the stone made foundation walls for the schoolhouse were already built. Now Christmas was approaching and Michaela had told Sully, she needed to talk to him in the evening. Maude and she had decided, it was time for the men to let go of old disagreements and anger. The women had planned that they would spend Chritmas at the mercantile together.

When supper was finished Sully cleared his throat. "I got something I wanna talk about, too."

"What is it?" Michaela was curious and Hannah also looked expectantly.

"Well, I think I should move out of the barn again."

Hannah was excited. "Pa 'n bed 'gain?" She loved having her father in the house.

Sully slightly chuckled. "No, sweet girl. I'll go sleep somewhere else."

"Why?" The little girl was puzzled.

Sully turned towards Dr. Mike. "The men at the building site are talking. It don't matter to me but I think after all that happened we oughta watch what they are saying about you."

Michaela blushed and looked down at her hands placed in her lap.

Hannah didn't like it when she was left out. She tugged at her father's sleeve and made him turn back to her. The girl had heard what her Pa had said but she didn't understand why he wanted to go away because other men talked. "Why?"

Sully sighed. "A man and a woman should only live at the same place when they're married. But me and your Ma ain't married."

The girl was insistent. "Why?"

Michaela's blush deepened and Sully began to stammer, "Well…you know…it is…ehm, marrying isn't something you just do. It takes time. I…" He stopped when he saw he had lost his daughter's attention.

Hannah was looking across the table now and it was obvious that her Ma was considering her father's words. It concerned the child and she asked anxiously, "Ma?"

Michaela's mind raced. She hadn't been prepared for Sully's announcement. If she was honest, she would have to admit that she liked their arrangement. Since he had been well enough he had helped around the house and he always watched Hannah when she was busy with chores or cooking. And in the evening it had become a habit that they sat together either at the table or, if the weather was good enough, on the porch stair. Sometimes they talked, but often they just sat in a comfortable silence. She had actually forgotten she was only a guest in this house. But of course he was right. Now, that she could be sure she wouldn't lose the girl…But it was hard nevertheless.

She straightened up and directed her words at Sully. "Since Hannah is close enough to you in the meantime, it is time for me to let you be the family you are. This is your house, Sully. I can move back into the clinic."

"No!" The girl instantly climbed down from her chair and rushed to Michaela. She clutched her Ma's waist with her little arms and buried her face in her chest. "No! Pease, 'n't go!"

Sully was taken aback. _How could she think he wanted her to go?_ "Of course your Ma will stay, Hannah. I still have some places where I can go."

Michaela was incredulous. "It is winter, Sully, you can't hardly sleep outside."

"The Cheyenne live outdoors their whole lives, Dr. Mike. I will manage," he assured.

The girl was torn now. The thought of losing one of them devastated her and tears started to fall. "Ma 'n Pa stay, pease!"

Michaela tried to soothe her. Stroking the soft blond hair she assured, "We'll find a way sweetheart. Right, Sully?" He frowned but he nodded.

They found an agreement. In the evenings he wouldn't leave until his daughter had fallen asleep. During the days nothing had changed, he only slept somewhere else. She hadn't asked where he went every evening and he didn't tell.

In the middle of January the shell of the schoolhouse was done. Michaela hadn't expected it to be so soon, that's why she hadn't thought of a teacher yet. But Horace had taken care of the advertisements now and when she was about to leave the Telegraph Office, he called her back. "Dr. Mike, wait! I almost forgot, Sully's got a letter, too. Would you mind giving it to him?"

She was surprised and took it. "Sure, why not?"

It was obvious to her, the letter came from a woman; the writing and the smell of lilacs…She felt her heart skip a beat. Although they had been growing much closer over the last few weeks she still felt insecure about him.

Walking back to the clinic she found herself daydreaming again, something that happened quite often lately. There were only tiny hints that there could be more between them, and she wasn't even sure if she wasn't just imagining it. But when he helped her down from the wagon…she couldn't remember the first time when she had felt his hands linger an instant longer on her waist than necessary. She had surprised herself when she didn't want to move away. His hands were so warm and so strong…Or when they sat next to each other on the driver's bench of the wagon…when they took a bend his thigh seemed to touch hers more often now, earlier they hadn't touched at all…or when she gave Hannah from her arms into his their hands always met recently or…

In the evening he was already about to leave when she remembered the letter.

"Sully, wait!" She caught him in the doorway, reaching for his arm. "Horace gave me a letter for you." She pulled it out of the pocket of her coat that hung next to the door and gave it to him. Leaning against the door frame she waited for his reaction.

Sully could barely hide a smile, _not that she was curious_. But so was he, although after reading the sender he already knew whom it came from. Smelling at the envelope he raised his eyebrows, grinned at her and opened it. He was sure she thought the letter came from a woman.

After he had skimmed over the content he smiled down at her. "It seems I will go to a wedding."

She tried in vain to not let him see her confusion, and for a moment he enjoyed this. Not because he wanted to tease her, but seeing her reaction he could finally be sure he wasn't only the father of the child she adored.

"It's from my friend Daniel, I've told you about him. He's getting married next month. I promised him once if that day ever came, I'd be there."

Although her relief was palpable she asked concerned, "So you will have to leave again?"

Stepping closer he told her, "I've got a better idea. Daniel will start his family and I will show him mine."

She was not quite sure what he meant. "You want to take Hannah with you?"

A flying smile crossed his face. The townsfolk only knew her as a smart, independent woman who knew her own mind. But he had witnessed her insecurities as well and when he saw her now almost shyly standing in front of him, the urge to take her in his arms was overwhelming. "I'd like you to come with us."

She blushed and averted her eyes from him. "I don't know, Sully…"

He closed the distance between them and let the letter drop onto the floor. Laying his hands on her shoulders he whispered, "I do."

She looked up at him nervously, longingly. Slightly shaking her head she begged nearly inaudible, "No!"

But he didn't listen. His right hand caressed her cheek and when she almost melted under his touch he used his other hand to cup her face. When he slowly bent down she breathed, "Oh my God!" and closed her eyes.

It seemed to last an eternity until their lips finally met in a first brief attempt to explore the feeling that would come with this touch.

Never before in her whole life had Michaela experienced such a surge of emotions. She felt frightened and happy at the same time. She didn't want the sensation to end and when his lips started to caress hers with tenderness and longing, her knees weakened and her hands stroked up his back to finally hold on his shoulders for dear life.

Sully fought his own battle. When she didn't shy away, he dared venturing further and enveloped her mouth with his. He let his hands wander down to her back and her waist to hold her as close as possible.

Michaela thought she was drowning in him. When she sensed his tongue trying to part her lips, she opened her mouth and let him in. She had never done that before. The tip of his tongue meeting hers sent shivers up and down her spine and she started to tremble. Her heart raced and she could feel the drum in his chest resonate through her ribcage. She was losing control.

Sully knew he had to stop. Though he had longed to kiss her for a long time, he hadn't been prepared for the avalanche of longing he experienced right now. Her body seemed to be a part of his and he didn't want to let her go. But if he wanted to keep her, he would have to, now.

With great difficulty he removed his lips from hers. Showering her face with wet kisses he whispered, "See ya tomorrow."

Without waiting for her reply he left her abruptly.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 21 

Michaela was still leaning against the door frame. Pressing her hands on her chest above her heart she tried to regain her composure again. She still felt his lips, his hands, his body…She couldn't grasp any clear thought but her mind was rambling nevertheless.

_Oh my God! Oh my God, what have I done!_ _Will I ever be able to look at him without reliving that kiss again? Why didn't I stop him? Why didn't I stop myself? What must he think of me now? It had happened so unexpectedly and yet naturally…but it had changed everything, hadn't it? And why was he running away? He had even left his horse behind! How can I look him in the eyes again?_

Taking a deep breath to finally calm down she closed the door and sat down on the edge of her bed. Her hands were still shaking when suddenly another thought startled her. _Had he really said he wanted her to come with him to visit his friend? As his family? _

She didn't know if she was ready for such a step. It seemed she didn't know anything at all right now. She should try to catch some sleepBut she didn't find much of it this evening.

Neither did Sully. He prayed to the spirit he hadn't ruined everything. How could he have gone so far! He hadn't even told her yet that he had feelings for her. Of course he had hoped she had noticed it; but he couldn't be sure…though he had felt the gazes she sent in his direction when she thought he didn't see it. He smiled. His hand stroked the fur of the blanket that covered him. Her skin had been so soft…and when her mouth had opened… all he had wanted was to dive into her. She looked so fragile and yet so strong. How could he even think she would waste one thought on him? She was so smart, it was incredible how much she knew. But she had kissed him back…He grew excited again. It hadn't been all his doing, she'd been into it like he had. Maybe he could actually hope…? He turned on his side, and while curling up he felt the longing rising again.

When he entered the homestead the next morning, Sully was greeted by a sight that made him grin. Michaela was on all fours, pressing herself against the floor looking under Hannah's bed. His daughter immediately informed him, "Bunny 'nda bed!"

Michaela hadn't noticed him yet and so she was startled when she suddenly felt his hand on her back and heard him say, "Here, let me."

She shot up and in doing so she banged her head against the bedstead. When she finally sat straight, she held her head feeling embarrassed, "Sully, I didn't know you were here!"

He had crouched down beside her, but before he could begin to feel awkward, Hannah made the situation light again and tugged at his sleeve. "Must blow bump!" She pouted her lips to show him how.

He looked at Michaela and raised his eyebrows questioningly. When she only shrugged and tentatively smiled, he took her hand from the obviously hurting spot and carefully blew as his daughter had suggested. The girl nodded, satisfied. "Now y' kiss it."

This time he didn't hesitate and when he buried his mouth and nose in her hair, he couldn't help but linger a moment longer than a peck would last. He felt the softness of her hair, and the faint smell of herbs made his mind reel again. She didn't move away and his worries from the last night vanished. He squeezed her hand still held in his and with that her concerns disappeared as well.

Clapping her hands happily Hannah grinned at them, "Good!" She liked how her Pa held her Ma's hand and now they were looking at each other as if they were alone in the whole world. "Good!"

Michaela still couldn't believe how quickly she had become used to his soft kisses when he said good night. She liked feeling his arm around her shoulders when they sat together on the porch. But they hadn't shared another passionate kiss yet, both of them feared losing control.

And she couldn't believe that she actually had agreed to go with them. After Sully had explained that the trip to his friend would last at least two weeks due to the distance and that he'd like to spend some time with him, they had been very busy the next few weeks.

Daniel's wedding would be on Valentine's Day and the new school should start in the beginning of March. The interior works were almost finished and Robert E. had promised that the desks and chairs would be completed in time. Several women had answered the advertisement and Michaela and the Reverend tried to decide whom to choose, though the lady doctor had already made up her mind. There was one applicant who seemed to be special. Miss James' letter wasn't as formal as the others and she came from the East like Michaela, although she was living in Denver now. The only snag was that she was engaged, which meant she wouldn't work for long. But Miss James had announced she would come personally to introduce herself. The Reverend had written her that she was welcome. But today he would be in town only at noon, that's why Michaela had volunteered to meet her when she arrived with the morning coach.

Sully still had some things to do, so the doctor was alone awaiting the possible new teacher. Avoiding the dust that the wheels were raising up to the air, Michaela swirled around. When she dared to turn back, there was only one passenger getting out of the coach. He was a very handsome man in his thirties, wearing a suit not too fancy but also not looking cheap. Obviously he was searching for someone, and since the teacher hadn't come Michaela approached him. Noticing her, he took his hat down.

"Excuse me, Ma'am, I'm looking for Dr. Quinn."

Smiling she held out her hand, "I'm Dr. Quinn. What can I do for you?"

Astonishment was shining in his clear blue eyes. Shaking her hand he introduced himself. "Chris James, I'd like to be the teacher of this town."

Now it was Michaela's turn to be surprised. "I thought Chris came from Christine, so I was expecting a female."

He grinned at her openly. "So was my father. I should have been named Christine but instead it's Christopher. Although I prefer to be called just Chris." Taking in her appearance he added, "I'm sure you know the problem with the wrong gender."

She laughed out loud. "Yes, certainly I do."

They were gazing at each other for some moments, already knowing they would be friends. Michaela finally broke the silence. "I'll show you the place where you will be working, if you still want it."

"There is nothing I'd like more."

Sully had seen them coming. He was wondering who this stranger was and why Michaela had such an animated conversation with him. He was in the second classroom and when they arrived, he didn't step out immediately. Even when Michaela called for him, he remained silent. First he had to know what they were talking about.

Chris was impressed. "What a beautiful building. It will be a pleasure to teach here."

Michaela was pleased that he liked it. "I've told Sully what I've been dreaming about only two months ago and now it is almost done."

Chris observed her knowingly. "Sully is more than the architect of your dream, isn't he?"

She blushed and bent her head as if she had detected something interesting on the ground. "Yes, he is."

Chris smiled, he thought her an adorable mixture of being smart and shy. "Then he is a lucky man."

At this point Sully decided he had heard enough. Stepping out of the schoolhouse he immediately positioned himself next to Michaela and laid his arm possessively around her shoulders. Only after that he gave the stranger a nod. "Welcome to town, Mr. James." He had no intention to make this a long conversation.

Michaela was puzzled. Sully had never been rude but his behaviour almost made him look like that. She cleared her throat. "Sully, I suggested that Chris…" Feeling him tensing up she questioningly looked at him. "Are you alright?"

He nodded. "Uhm..Yeah, go on."

But she was not convinced. Sully looked tired and there was something else she couldn't put her finger on. Turning her attention back to Chris she had already changed her mind. "I apologize, but I think a joint dinner will have to wait until we are back from our journey from Sully's friend in Nevada. We will leave tomorrow evening and there is still so much to prepare…"

Chris smiled and assured, "Of course, I understand. I'll meet Reverend Johnson in the afternoon and talk to him about the book list you mentioned. And I think I'll take the evening coach back to Denver. Don't worry, I'll be alright. I'll meet you when you are back from your trip." He tipped his hat. "Dr. Quinn, Mr. Sully," he slightly bowed and turned to leave them. Michaela was concerned. She gazed up at Sully and couldn't see the loving look in his eyes she had become used to. Not bothering if they were being watched she tenderly cupped his face in her hands. "What's troubling you?" When he didn't answer, she insisted. "Please, tell me!"

But he didn't want to make a fool of himself and tell her that he had been thinking that this other man had more in common with her after some minutes than he and Michaela would ever have. So he smiled down at her and made a weak attempt for an excuse. "I'm tired, I should get some rest before we leave tomorrow. If you don't mind I ain't coming for supper this evening. I'll see ya at the reservation in the morning."

She took her hands back from his face. Something was wrong but she didn't understand what it was and why. She closed her eyes momentarily and felt tears rising behind her eyelids. Taking one step back she asked without looking at him, "Is it something I have done?"

He instantly took her in a tight embrace. Reveling in the feeling of her in his arms he whispered in her ear, "You've done nothing, I'm the fool." He tenderly pressed his lips against her temple and then he left.

Michaela hardly slept and when she arrived at the reservation the next morning, she didn't know what to expect from Sully. Looking around she couldn't detect him, so she decided to talk to Cloud Dancing first. She had brought some medical supplies that should last for the next two or even three weeks. Matthew would bring in the milk three times a week and she would examine the sickest Indians this morning.

After she had discussed some cases with the medicine man, she went to Little Blackbird's tent. If Cloud Dancing was right, the girl wouldn't survive the day. Opening the flap she saw Sully with an arm around the sobbing Flying Sun. Michaela thought she should have known that because it was not the first time she found him this way. Dismissing the thought, she crouched down next to the sick girl. Without examining her she knew the medicine man was right. Looking at Sully she asked him, "Take Flying Sun outside, please." Nodding in understanding he rose and helped the Indian woman up.

"And Sully," he looked back at her, "Hannah is with Snowbird, maybe the three of you could take a little walk."

Again he nodded and just replied, "Sure."

Leading the Indian woman towards a fallen trunk Sully told his daughter, "Hannah, go and see if you can find some flowers for Flying Sun. She needs some cheering up." Like Dr. Mike once had said, his daughter was a smart girl. The girl knowingly looked back at her father and left them alone.

Sully had spent half the night thinking. He was sure he loved Michaela, but he wasn't sure anymore if it could actually lead to somewhere. Spending the night with Cloud Dancing and Snowbird had made him long for this simple life again. But of course he knew he couldn't gain it back after he had made his steps into _her_ world. And he had to think of his daughter, too. Sighing he turned his attention to Flying Sun again and sat down on the trunk next to her.

The Indian woman was despaired. Looking in the direction where they had come from she saw the Medicine Woman approaching. In an attempt to keep Sully, who hadn't noticed Dr. Mike yet, she clasped his hands in hers. Gazing at him with tear-filled eyes she began to speak.

"I will be alone. No father," she took her left hand away from his and touched his beads. "No sister," she touched his cheek and whispered, "Or brother." She knew about his family. "No mother," and she caressed his lips. Feeling her touch and the truth in her words Sully momentarily closed his eyes. Opening them again he gazed directly into hers and the woman added, "You and me, we are same." Without thinking he replied, "Yes, we are." And when he saw her soft lips come closer he bent slightly forward to meet them.

Snowbird had Michaela shown the direction they had taken. Coming around a bend she saw Sully and the Indian woman sitting close together on a fallen trunk. And then suddenly time seemed to slow down when she watched the other woman touching him and Sully letting it happen. She didn't want to trust her eyes when she saw them kissing, though Sully moved away almost instantly. Michaela wanted to scream, but she couldn't. She wanted to run away, but she couldn't. She wanted to breathe again, but she could only gasp for air.

Hearing this sound Sully's head flew in her direction. He was sure the horror in her face was mirrored in his own. With a quick movement he was at her side and grasped her arm. "Wait! Michaela, it's not what you thought!" He desperately tried to get through to her.

She didn't believe him. "Do you love her?"

"Of course not!" _Didn't she know by now that she was the love of his life?_

"But you care for her."

He grew impatient. "Yes, I care. But…"

She cut him off. "Then you _have_ feelings for her!"

He became defensive. "Stop putting words in my mouth. Stop assuming things!" He saw that her face suddenly drained all color.

Michaela could feel how she paled. He was right. He had never said he loved her. She only had assumed it. Trying not to lose her composure she told him, "I will."

He had lost her trail of thoughts because he desperately searched for a way to keep her with him. "I don't understand. You will what?"

In the meantime, Michaela could barely stand anymore because her legs began to tremble. She had to get away from here! "I will stop assuming things." Shewas only able to whisper.

This time Sully understood her without any other word. "Michaela, I _do_ love you!"

But it was too late. He was losing her.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 22 

Michaela was speechless for a moment. She couldn't believe what she had heard a moment ago. When she finally spoke, Sully winced hearing her words. "You have just kissed another woman and now you are telling me you love me? How dare you!" Her cheeks flushed with anger. "I wish I had never…"

When her gaze left his face and trailed behind his shoulder she paled again. This time her legs gave way to the returning weakness and she had to crouch down. Momentarily burying her face in her hands she whispered, "Oh no!"

Sully turned around to see what had caused her reaction and was stunned as well. He had forgotten that his daughter was there.

Hannah hadn't found any flowers, but of course she had known that from the beginning. Her Pa wanted to console the Indian woman because her little sister was very sick. She was determined to help, too and so she searched for something that could cheer the woman up. When she had found a twig that looked like a tall, thin man, she smiled happily. _That would do it!_ She turned to go back to them, but what she saw let her freeze in her place. _Her Pa was kissing Flying Sun! _Her little heart began to race._ But that wasn't possible! Her Pa was only supposed to kiss Ma! Did he want another Ma for her? _When suddenly her Pa shot up the girl saw Dr. Mike. Her Ma's face was terribly pale. Even from the distance the child sensed she was so shocked that she might go away from her and her Pa. But then their gazes met and she sent a mute plea to the person she loved more than anything in the world. _Please don't leave me!_

Seeing her Ma crouching down Hannah knew she had heard her. Looking at her father, who was turning to her now, the little girl told him with all firmness she could muster in her first complete sentence, "I don't want another Ma!"

Sully instantly rushed to her and lifted his daughter into his arms. "Of course not!" He clutched his child against his chest, "Of course not."

Hannah turned in his arms to look at her Ma. But before anyone could speak again Snowbird came around the bend. Sensing that something had happened the Indian woman hesitated to step closer. But Sully, glad about the distraction, encouraged her, "What is it?"

Still not sure if she was disturbing them Snowbird spoke to Dr. Mike. "If you do not mind, my husband would like to talk to you before you leave."

Michaela, in the meantime standing again, assured her, "I don't mind, I just…" Out of the corner of her eye she noticed how Hannah wriggeld out of Sully's hold. Reaching the ground the girl rushed to her Ma and hugged her legs tightly. "No leave, pease!"

Michaela sighed and bent down. Stroking the little girl's hair she explained, "I'm just going to see Cloud Dancing, Sweetheart. I'll be back before you know it."

But Hannah only shook her head and propped her thumb in her mouth. Alarmed by that sight, because it proved how badly upset the child was, Michaela gave in. "Alright, if your Pa doesn't mind, you may come with me." She didn't even look at him, but Sully immediately assured, "You go, I'll meet you at the wagon."

When the three of them were out of earshot Sully turned back to Flying Sun, who was standing there somewhat forlornly. There was an awkward silence for a moment, but the Indian woman knew she had to act fast. Stepping closer to Sully she touched his arm. "When my sister dies, I am alone. You promised you will help me when I need you. I need you now."

But Sully was still with Michaela in his thoughts. "You'll have the help of your family."

Flying Sun attempted again. "You are my family now."

Turning back his attention to the woman in front of him Sully replied, "No, I ain't and you know that."  
Laying the palm of her hand on her chest above her heart she tried to convince him, "My heart is with you!"

Hearing her words Sully realized that he hadn't only hurt Michaela, but this woman, too. But he knew he had to be totally honest, so after a long beat he replied, "My heart …is with Dr. Mike."

"But she had seen us, you have lost her!" Flying Sun sounded desperately.

Sully suddenly grew suspicious. "Did you know she was coming?" The Indian woman only shrugged and smiled almost rebelliously.

Seeing that, Sully understood that he had made a fool of himself. He actually had felt sorry for her, that's why she had been able to get through to him in the first place. His rising anger almost took his voice away. "I ain't gonna forgive you that, never!"

But Flying Sun knew she had still one argument left. "You kissed me back!"

"I ain't gonna forgive myself either." He turned and walked away. He knew in his heart, this time it was final. So did she. Sitting down on the trunk again she started to weep bitter tears of disappointment and desperation.

Reaching the village again Sully noticed an unusual commotion. When he spotted Snowbird and his daughter in front of Flying Sun's teepee, he rushed towards them. Hannah shied away from him and Cloud Dancing's wife informed him, "Little Blackbird is going to meet the spirits. Her sister should be here. Will you please get her?"

But her husband's brother refused it. Shaking his head he replied, "You go, I wanna talk to my daughter."

This was not a reaction Snowbird had expected from Sully. Something had happened, she had known it from the moment she had seen them all together. Dr. Mike had been awfully quiet on their way back. Scrutinizing the man's face the Indian woman stated, "Flying Sun did something stupid."

Bending down to be on eye level with his child he spoke to both of them, "I've been the fool, I just realized it too late." Snowbird nodded in understanding and left them.

But Hannah didn't react to his statement. When he lifted her in his arms he could feel her resisting. Tenderly he guided her face with his fingertips so that she had to look at him. "Hannah, listen to me. I've made a terrible mistake and your Ma is very angry with me. And she has every right to be, but of course I wanna keep her. I will never want another Ma for you." Sensing that he was getting through to his girl he added, "But I'll need your help. Will you do that for me?" The girl's embrace told him that a load had been taken off her mind.

Tentatively smiling at her father the child needed reassuring. "Keepin' Ma?"

Sully hugged her tightly to his chest and whispered, "There's nothing I want more and you must help me because she ain't gonna listen to me." The girl nodded eagerly and their pact was sealed.

An hour later they were on their way to the homestead. Hannah had insisted in sitting on her Ma's lap, so Sully had taken the reins. They rode in silence. The girl had snuggled up to her Ma and when her father looked at her from time to time, she smiled back at him. Her Pa had said it was wrong what he had done and that he was sorry about it. That was all the child needed and now she would help to put things right again.

Michaela didn't notice the mute communication between father and daughter. She felt as if all energy had left her body. First the shattering realization that once again she had lived in a dream world and then the loss of the Indian girl. It had never been easy for her losing a patient and she had known for some time the child wouldn't make it. But it had been terrible when Little Blackbird had asked for her sister and she wasn't there.

Flying Sun…Michaela couldn't get that picture of Sully kissing her out of her mind. What made things even worse was the statement of being the same that she had heard before. It had hit her so hard because she herself had felt during the last weeks that she and Sully had more in common than she had hoped for. Seeing how he had built exactly the schoolhouse she had had in her mind had made her dreaming there could be a special connection between them…Not to mention the touches and kisses…_that_ kiss…She still didn't understand how she could have been so stupid again. When she thought back now, she knew all the signs had been there this time. When he wasn't with Cloud Dancing, he was with _her_. He had left because of _her_. _Her_ dream catcher still was in the house although he had said he would give it back…But it was useless to think about that now. She had to think of the future. She knew if she wanted Hannah in her life, Sully would be there, too. So she would handle it the same as she did with every defeat in her life, pushing it in the back of her mind. She wouldn't show him any emotions, so he couldn't play with her feelings again. She had to be strong as she always was. Taking a deep breath she sat up straighter and smiled down at the child on her lap. She would get over it, she had to.

When they reached the homestead Sully volunteered to take care of the horse and the wagon. Seeing the baggage when she entered the house Michaela suddenly remembered that they had planned to start their trip to Nevada this evening. She had totally forgotten about that. But she couldn't go with him now! She had to repack the bags with Hannah's things and she immediately started to do so.

When Sully stepped in, she already was frantically working on her task. Puzzled he asked her, "What are you doing?"

She didn't deign a look at him. "Unpacking my things."

Sully knew that the first battle had started. He went to his daughter and while he lifted her in his arms he whispered, "You must help me now!" The girl nodded eagerly.

Sully cleared his throat. "We can't go without you."

Michaela was curt. "Why not?"

"Because we don't wanna."

"I'm afraid you will have no choice."

"Then I ain't going either."

The sentences flew through the room like arrows. By the last one Michaela shot a look at him. "You've made a promise to your friend, remember?"

"If you don't come, we don't go."

Now her temper was rising. "I can't come with you and pretend we are a family."

He could be stubborn as well. "Fine, then we're all gonna stay."

"So I have to feel guilty because you will stand your friend up on his wedding day?"

"If you come with us, you don't have to feel guilty!" He was adamant.

"How dare you…"

A little voice interrupted them. "Pease, Ma!"

With that Michaela was disarmed. She knew that the girl had waited for the trip so eagerly, it had been her only topic for the last few weeks. Suddenly feeling incredibly tired she sank on the next chair. She didn't know what to do. She needed to keep her distance from him, at least as long as she was able to control her feelings again. But she couldn't disappoint Hannah, could she? What was more important? Asking herself this question she already knew the answer. Sighing she rose again and went back to the bags. Without looking in their direction she told them, "I'm coming for Hannah's sake. That is the only reason, I hope you understand what I am saying."

The girl had only heard that they would go on the trip. She squealed with delight, hugged her Pa's neck and after he had her put down she rushed to her Ma, embracing her legs as well. And for Sully it didn't matter why she was coming, as long as she did it at all.

It had been an uneventful journey so far. They had changed the train in Salt Lake City and were now on their way to their destination, the little town called Wells. Hannah didn't get tired of asking questions all the time. They both had answered her patiently, and Michaela had been astonished again to see how much Sully knew about the history of the land and its nature. But she had refused to talk to him about their relationship, if there was any at all. Everytime he had started, she had stopped him immediately. She wasn't ready yet. When she thought about it, she still felt her emotions out of control.

As patient as he was with his daughter's never-ending questions, Sully began to feel more and more frustrated at Michaela's constant rejections. Hannah was sleeping now and Michaela was standing at a window of the narrow passenger car corridor, looking at the passing landscape. Closing the door of the compartment and stepping behind her, he gave her no chance to escape. He was looking out the window as well. "You're not letting this go, are you?"

She knew, she had to face him this time. "So I can be made a fool of again?"

"Is that how you see it?" His voice was low.

So was hers. "I've come to believe you were different from other men." She paused. "It hurt when I had to see that I was wrong."

Sully grew defensive. "Nothing ever happened between me and Flying Sun. I wouldn't let it!"

But Michaela didn't listen to him because she finally recognized why it had hit her so hard. Whispering she spoke it out loud. "I've trusted you." She closed her eyes to stop the tears that were threatening to flow, but a few of them made her way down her cheeks nevertheless.

Sully swallowed and wished he could do something to take away the pain he had caused. "I'm sorry." He wasn't able to say any more. He didn't want to lose her. No, he couldn't afford to lose her. Maybe he could live without Michaela, but he wouldn't be living.

They stood in dead silence for a while. When they eventually went back into their compartment, the atmosphere was still tense. But Michaela knew she had to get along with Sully's presence for Hannah's sake. She had just to be more careful this time.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 23 

Michaela had slept for a while. When she woke up, she hadn't open her eyes yet. She sensed the sun on her face and the light penetrating her eyelids. Oddly enough she felt calm for the first time since that morning at the reservation. Something within her had changed after their talk. Maybe it was because she knew now why she had been so deeply hurt. She could live without trusting someone, she had done it before. She would look at the bright side and enjoy the free days. After working so hard for the last few weeks she could use a vacation. _Vacation sounded good._ The corners of her mouth slightly turned up.

Sully was watching her, though he was careful not to get caught if she suddenly woke up. Her tears had brought it home to him that he had done far more than just kiss another woman. He remembered the first time he had seen her. Only because of her appearance he had thought she was an angel. Even if it sounded crazy, after getting to know her he was sure, she was one. Thanks to Michaela his daughter was a happy little girl, although she had never met her own mother. Her own mother…Sully wasn't sure if Abigail would have done the same. After the doctor had told them how risky it was for her to give birth, Sully had tried to convince her to take in an orphan baby. There had been enough in Denver, but Abigail had wanted her own child. He had been so devastated after her death partly because he had blamed himself for not being adamant enough. But he was through with this topic, Cloud Dancing had helped him to see that it hadn't been anyone's fault. Sully sighed. His eyes shortly left Michaela's face to look down at the sleeping form of his daughter next to him on the seat. They would arrive in an hour, maybe he should wake them both up.

The brakes of the train were squealing and in a burst of steam it lurched to a stop. With Hannah in his arms Sully precariously descended to the ground. Mike, still standing on the train platform and letting her gaze wander, was almost taken aback. A small town? Besides some building sites, there was nothing to see but a street, covered with sandy soil and across the street a Wells Fargo office, the station office in a box car and a log shanty saloon. Some saloon girls were waiting outside for new costumers the train might bring to them. Nevertheless, Michaela decided not to jump to conclusions about the location and began stepping down as well.

Daniel had spotted Sully and was immediately by his side. Hugging his friend tightly he included the little girl into the embrace and made Hannah giggle. Bending back again to take in the two of them Daniel stated, "So, this is your child, I assume. But where is Abigail?" Looking around he suddenly spotted Michaela. Wearing one of her Boston travelling dresses and firmly gripping her medical bag she seemed to be totally out of place here. Tapping Sully's arm Daniel exclaimed, "Look at that! Wow! What a sight! Did you already meet her? If I wasn't to be married…Uh oh, now she's coming to us!"

Sully chuckled. "Actually she came _with_ us."

Daniel was astonished. "Well, I always knew you could get every woman if you only wanted , but this one? Wow!"

Sully wasn't sure if Dr. Mike had heard them and felt slightly uncomfortable. But she gave his friend one of her breathtaking smiles. Holding out her hand she introduced herself, "Michaela Quinn. It is a pleasure to meet you."

Daniel bowed to kiss her hand. Straightening again he replied, "Daniel Simon. The pleasure is all mine, I assure you." Then he turned his questioning eyes back to his friend. "Sully?"

But before Sully could react, screams and neighing noises from one of the building sites were heard. All heads turned towards that direction. A spooked horse was galloping away. When Michaela saw one of the men lying on the street, screaming from the top of his lungs, she ran towards him, all the others in tow.

Arriving first, the doctor instantly crouched down to examine the man but another one grasped her roughly by the arm. "Hold on there! Take your hands off of my brother!."

Putting down Hannah and pulling the stranger away from Dr. Mike was one movement for Sully. Dangerously low he told the man, "Let her do her job, she's a doctor." Startled by the coldness in Sully's eyes the attacker instantly stepped back.

Michaela didn't pay attention to the gaping crowd, she was only looking at Sully. "His shoulder is dislocated, I need two men to steady him."

"Of course. Daniel, come here." But his friend was still too surprised to act. _This woman a doctor?_ Sully grew impatient. "Daniel!" Daniel finally moved. "Alright, if you say so," and he stepped closer.

"When I tell you, please hold him here," Michaela pointed where she needed them to put their hands on, then she turned to the patient again and explained, "I have to set your shoulder. It will hurt. Do you think you can stand the pain? If not, I can give you something."

The young man groaned. "Need nothin', only hurry."

Michaela nodded, looking up at Daniel and Sully she told them, "Now." They crouched down and firmly held the young man on the ground . The doctor took off one shoe and sat down, putting her heel in the man's armpit. Then she grasped his forearm, asking, "Are you ready?". When he nodded she told him, "Take a deep breath." Watching him she steadily pulled his arm with all the force she could muster and then jerked it hard. With that the bones snapped back into place. The patient couldn't suppress a piercing scream, but afterwards it was obvious, that his pain had plainly lessened. "Now I have to fix your shoulder, you mustn't move your arm for a while."

While Michaela was still tending to her patient and the crowd lingered watching her, Daniel pulled Sully aside. "Who is she? And where is Abigail?"

"Wait a moment." Sully first went to Hannah and lifted her in his arms again. Resting her on his hip he came back and explained, "Abigail died giving birth to our daughter. Michaela and me are raising her now."

"So she's your wife?" Daniel gave him an approving look.

"I'm afraid, not…"

Before he could further explain their relationship he suddenly felt a hand on his arm and a raspy seductive female voice was heard. "A widower, poor man. I can make you feel better." Turning around Sully saw one of the prostitutes. "No, thanks, no need for that."

But the woman was determined to win a new customer. Stroking his arm and provocatively looking at him she purred, "I can help you ease your tension."

Unwillingly Sully tried to get rid of her. "I would thank you to take your hands off of me." Recognizing this sound in his friend's voice, Daniel sharply said, "Claire, it's enough."

The woman shrugged and rolled her eyes. "Alright, but at least I could try." Muttering under her breath, "What a waste, such a handsome man," she disappeared in the direction of the saloon.

Hearing Michaela clearing her throat behind them, both men jolted around. "A nice start for a vacation." Her smile was slightly embarrassed and Sully knew, she had heard it all. But she just continued, "I'm ready now. I wouldn't mind going to wherever you plan to take us, Mr. Simon."

"Of course, I'll go and get John. He will drive us. And it's just Daniel, ma'am."

"Oh," she gave a short amused laugh. "Please forget the ma'am´, I'd like you to call me Michaela."

"Alright, Michaela it is. I'll be back in a minute," and he went towards the railroad office.

Sully contemplated what to say. He felt as if he was walking on thin ice and would break it no matter which move he made. So he simply said, "I'm sorry."

She shrugged it off. "It's not your fault that you're handsome." As soon as the words had left her mouth Michaela blushed heavily. She hastily turned around and went towards their baggage they had left next to the trails and left a stunned Sully behind.

Daniel had told them they would stay at the ranch of his fiancée's father. The carriage he had brought looked expensive and had four seats. They were on their way now. Daniel was occupied by Hannah. He had instantly won the little girl's heart after he had produced a silver dollar from behind her ear. Sitting on her father's lap opposite her new uncle her eyes hung on his lips to not miss one of his words.

"…after I had found the gold and opened my own mine I'd made sufficient money to convince Sophy's father that I'm good enough for his daughter. Now we make our plans together. The next thing we'll do is to build a hotel at the main street. Only, we still need an architect."

Without thinking Michaela eagerly told him, "Sully has just built a wonderful schoolhouse in Colorado Springs…" Embarrassed about her outburst she turned her head to look out of the window.

Daniel let his gaze wander between his friend and the woman next to him. Something was going on here, and he was determined to find out what it was.

Twenty minutes later they arrived at the edge of a beautiful valley. Daniel asked the driver for a halt and they all stepped out to admire the view. On the ground of the valley, there were several paddocks and cow enclosures as well as barns, stables and cowsheds. It was obvious that the owner of this land was a rich man. The sight of the rooming house made it clear even more convincing. It was built on a slope halfway from the ground to the edge of the valley.

Sully slapped his friend's back in admiration. "A nice place to live in, Daniel."

When they had arrived at the house there were the introductions and almost immediately after that they had sat down for dinner. Sophy was a nice young lady with long black hair and warm brown eyes. She and Michaela had liked each other at first sight. They were upstairs now, putting Hannah to bed and unpack the bags.

The two friends were sitting in big arm chairs by the fireplace in the spacious living room. Daniel curiously looked at Sully. "Wanna tell me what's going on?"

Sully sighed. Maybe it was good to talk to someone. After he had finished his story, Daniel incredulously asked him, "You had _her_ and kissed another woman? Don't take me wrong my friend, but you are an idiot."

Sully shot him a look. "Do you think I don't know that? She's only here because of Hannah. I have to find a way to win her back Daniel, but I have no idea how to do it."

Daniel was contemplating the options and then suggested, "We should ask Sophy, women are better with such things. And it seems the two of them are getting along together. Maybe Michaela had already told her something." As if she had heard him, his fiancée descended the stairs.

"Honey, we need your help." Daniel came straight to the point. After he had explained the situation Sophy thought about it. "Well, she had told nothing, but Hannah seems to know much about her. She talked a great deal about the train and her Ma especially. We have to find a way to talk to her without Michaela, so we can try to ask her more about her Ma."

The next morning Michaela saved them from thinking up an excuse. At the breakfast table she announced, "I would like to go back to the train station again and make sure that the young man from yesterday is alright. I also would like to send a wire to Loren and Maude."

The three other adults at the table tried to hide their relief that they could seize the opportunity to talk to Hannah. Finally Daniel replied, "Of course, Michaela. When we are ready here I'll let John know that he is to drive you to town."

As Hannah was getting ready to voice that she will go with her Ma, Sophy approached her with, "While your Ma is in town you can help me see if my wedding dress fits alright. Would you like that?" The girl was visibly torn. A wedding dress or a drive alone with her Ma, this was difficult.

Seeing how the girl frowned under the pressure of the decision she had to make, Michaela had to laugh out loud. "It's alright, sweetheart. It is not often that you can help with a wedding dress. You stay here and I'll be back before you know it. How does that sound?" The girl instantly climbed down from her chair and rushed to her Ma. Rising on her tiptoes she gave her a wet peck on the cheek. "You hurry, right?"

As soon as Michaela had left, the three sat down with the child again. Sully began. "Listen to me, sweet girl. You know your Ma is still sad sometimes because I did something bad. That's why I wanna do something for her that will make her happy again. Do you know something that I could do?" Hannah was puzzled. She didn't know what her father wanted to hear. Helplessly shrugging she looked from her Pa to her new uncle Daniel. So it was his turn now. "Ehm, what does ya Ma like?" That question didn't make it clearer for the girl.

Sophy linked her hand with Daniel's and bent towards Hannah. "Did you talk about the wedding when you packed your bags?" The child nodded eagerly.

"Good. What did she tell you?"

This was difficult again. In response to his question she said,"You love 'n marry?" The girl started to be anxious because she didn't know what the adults wanted to know. Sensing her growing discomfort Sully went to his daughter and lifted her from the chair to sit down again with her on his lap. "Sh, it's alright, don't worry." The girl nodded and felt better in the arms of her Pa.

In the meantime Sophy had tried to picture the situation on how Michaela packed her bags. "Has your Ma put something special into the trunk? Like smelling soap or a perfume?"

Hannah only had heard the words something special´ and shook her head violently.

Sully knew the signs when his daughter wanted to hide something. He assured her, "You can tell us."

But the girl was adamant. "Pomise. 'pise for Pa."

Her father wanted to know if he had understood her right. "You promised your Ma not to tell me because it's a surprise for me?"

Hannah nodded and the others were helpless for a moment. They couldn't make a child break a promise. Then Sophy had an idea. "But you didn't promise not to tell me. So if your Pa covers his ears and can't hear you, you could tell me, right?"

The girl considered the problem. Her face lit up when she finally nodded. After making sure her Pa didn't listen she bent towards her new aunt and whispered, "Butiful dess, for dance."

Sophy was relieved. "So your Ma hopes to dance a lot at the wedding?"

Now the girl smiled openly. "Ma love dance."

The engaged couple leaned back with a sigh of contentment and Daniel said to Sully who took the hands from his ears, "That should be easy. Just make sure she only dances with you all evening."

But Sully had to break the bad news. "I can't dance, Daniel. I mean literally."

"Oh!" Their faces fell again, but Sophy saw no problem. "Then I'll teach you. Daniel," she turned to her future husband, "You'll take Michaela to Angel Lake this afternoon and I will do my best to teach your friend."

Now all eyes went back to Sully. He wasn't pleased with the idea of dancing, but if it helped to mend things between Michaela and him, he would do anything. So he sighed and nodded. "Okay, I'm gonna do it."


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 24 

It wasn't easy to convince Michaela to go only with Daniel and Hannah on the excursion to Angel Lake. When Sophy came up with the excuse of a headache, the doctor immediately wanted to examine her. But the firm assurance of the young woman that a rest was all she needed, finally satisfied Michaela to agree in leaving for the afternoon. She didn't ask if Sully would come when he didn't get ready to join them.

They returned to the ranch much earlier than expected. They didn't even have a chance to see the lake because all ways leading there were snowy. So they had no choice but to turn back.

Arriving at the house they heard the sound of a music box from inside. Daniel reacted fast and sent Hannah to her Pa to announce that they were back. In the meantime he tried to distract Michaela by explaining the functions of the different buildings in the valley beneath them. When they finally entered the house, Michaela was fully aware that the music had stopped. She also noticed that Sophy was blushing and Sully looked embarrassed. Daniel didn't seem to be concerned about that and it wasn't her business as to what was going on here. But she began to wish she didn't have to be there.

Of course Sully immediately sensed her discomfort but knew he couldn't do anything about it right now. She wouldn't believe him anyway.

At the breakfast table the next day Daniel announced, "I'll take us all to a nearby valley this morning. It's a surprise for Sophy," and he bent towards her to give her a peck on the cheek. "But I have a reason why I want to show it to you, too." He turned to his friend and smiled at him.

An hour later they all stood on the edge of a valley. It wasn't as large as the one they came from but it was still lovely. The slopes fell gently and on the ground grew several groups of trees. A brook that was frozen at the moment crossed the valley from one end towards the other. In the distance a range of snow-covered mountains was to be seen. Both women exclaimed simultaneously, "It's beautiful!"

Daniel beamed and positioned himself behind his fiancée. Wrapping his arms around her he told her, "That's where we gonna live."

Sophy turned in his arms and looked up at him. "Really?"

He kissed her soundly and then assured her, "Really."

When he stepped back from his fiancéehe turned to his friend. "How do you like it?"

Sully responded tentatively, "I agree, it's beautiful. But ain't you already living in a wonderful place?"

For a moment Daniel was puzzled. "Yeah, but…Oh, of course! It seems I didn't tell you yet… The house we're living in for now belongs to Sophy's father." When he saw that Sully wanted to interrupt him, he hastily assured, "He doesn't live there alone. Obviously I forgot to tell you that he will arrive with Sophy's brothers and all the servants after lunch. The house will be crowded enough, believe me. But we can stay there until our own home is built."

Then he hesitated for a moment. He had thought about the suggestion he wanted to offer before he knew about Sully's recent family situation. But he continued nevertheless. "I thought there could be two houses, one at each end of the valley." Having the attention from all of them he paused again. His bride was still radiantly smiling at him, Sully was unsure what to expect and Hannah, holding her Pa's hand, seemed to be happy just because she was together with all of them. But Daniel could tell by seeing Michaela's facial expression that she knew what would come. He looked from her to his friend again. "One house for my family and one house for yours. Wouldn't that be great?" He couldn't hide how much he enjoyed this idea.

Michaela immediately turned away from them. It would always be the same. There would always be either Indians, another woman or a friend Sully might decide to live with. Or if someone noticed his qualities as an architect, even a job could take him away from Colorado Springs. Of course he wouldn't abandon his daughter again, he would take her with him. She had known it from the day she took the girl in that this day would come. Hannah wasn't her child. But if she was honest, it wasn't only Hannah anymore. Why couldn't she just keep her emotions under control? She was angry with herself. She had already decided to close her heart again after seeing him with that Indian woman. _"Then finally do it!" _she silently screamed at herself. And when she heard Sully replying to his friend, the wall around her was already rebuilt.

"Thanks for the offer, but I can't do that. My life is in Colorado Springs." Sully spoke with total sincerity.

Daniel tried to object, but Sully angrily looked at him, pointing with his head in Michaela's direction. Clearing his throat, Daniel gave in for the moment. "Alright, we'll talk about it later."

When everyone entered the carriage again and sat on their seats, Hannah wanted to climb onto her Ma's lap. Michaela stroke the girl's soft blond hair and told her, "You should go to your Pa, sweetheart. He might be jealous if you always come to me."

Sully knew what she was trying to do but he was determined to not let it happen. "Don't worry about that, sweet girl," he grinned at his daughter to show her this wasn't a serious conversation. "I wantcha to stay with your Ma." Hannah smiled back at him happily. While she was making herself comfortable on her Ma's lap, she missed the mute conversation between her parents.

They were staring at each other. Sully's look was almost angry and he told her to stop that nonsense. She replied with, she only wanted what was best for the child. Neither of them gave in and suddenly their expressions changed. The connection was back. For a few moments his gaze broke the wall, caressing her hurt soul. And she let that happen.

Feeling tears arise Michaela abruptly turned and looked out of the window.

By the afternoon five of the eight rooms upstairs were occupied. Besides Michaela, Hannah and Sully, Sophy's brothers Peter and Paul and Paul's young girlfriend Sandra, who had just immigrated from Germany, were placed up there as well. Hannah instantly liked Sandra because she found the way she spoke funny. Peter and Paul were twenty years old twins and they were as like as two peas, though Peter insisted on being the older one, even if it were just ten minutes. But the most impressive character of the arriving people had been Sophy's father, Mr. Carl Wilson. It wasn't only that he was a tall, handsome man in his fifties with still blond hair and almost green eyes; the way he firmly took care of everything and everyone with authority was impressive, too.

The introductions were kept briefly because there were a lot of wedding supplies to be unloaded from the wagons and the carriages.

During dinner that evening, they all sat together in the dining room. Hannah was astonished by the large table. Even the chairs were bigger than those in the kitchen, and because she was too small to sit comfortably there, she was allowed to sit on her Pa's lap. She loved it.

The conversation at the table was light and mostly about the upcoming wedding the next afternoon. But the head of the household seemed to have been distracted. From time to time he looked at Michaela who was sitting opposite him. She didn't notice him because she couldn't get the moment in the carriage out of her mind. She finally admitted she was only fooling herself if she believed, getting over Sully would be as easy as she had hoped.

Sully on the other hand was fully aware of Mr. Wilson's attention for Michaela. He didn't like it. From the moment the man was introduced to Dr. Mike, he seemed to be searching for something he had forgotten and kept staring at her.

Eventually Michaela noticed the gaze. Looking back at the man she tried to be polite. "Is there something you want to ask me, Mr. Wilson?"

Without breaking eye contact he replied, "Living in the West is not the destiny you were raised for, am I right?"

She wasn't sure where this was leading. "No, but it is my choice, Mr. Wilson."

He acknowledged her answer and nodded. "A free spirit, I like that." He hesitated for a moment and laid his knife and fork down. "You must excuse my behaviour, Miss, but I swear I've already known you."

All at the table had fallen silent by now and observed the talk. Slightly blushing, Michaela assured him, "I have never seen you before, Mr. Wilson."

He seemed to be more and more convinced. "The way you talk…May I ask you where you come from?"

"I grew up in Boston, but now I live…"

"Boston!" It wasn't only Mr. Wilson who was astonished but his children as well.

Sophy told her, "We are from Boston, too."

Michaela was pleased. "Really? Then we should have a lot to talk about."

Finally it dawned on Carl. "May I look into your eyes again, please?" Michaela was growing uncomfortable and Sully now knew for sure that he didn't like this conversation.

But when an insistent, "Please?" followed, Michaela did the man the favor.

"Mismatched eyes, hazel and olive! I knew that I've seen you before! You are the son Josef Quinn didn't have on Valentine's Day. He called you Mike and showed off with you and your intelligence, your skills and mismatched eyes every time he was asked about his children."

Michaela blushed heavily. All eyes were on her now. "You knew my father?"

"Yes, I did. And you called me Uncle Carl when you were three." Michaela still didn't feel better about the situation.

Sandra was puzzled, she had some difficulties with the new language. She bent towards Paul and whispered, "I don't understand, how can she be a son?"

Mr. Wilson heard her. "My dear, Josef Quinn already had four daughters and he was sure the new child would be a son, born on Valentine's Day. But it was neither a son nor was it on February 14th. It was five minutes later. Back in those days, he was teased everywhere he went. But when the girl grew up he couldn't have been prouder of her. Unfortunately we lost contact when we moved to another part of Boston." He turned back to Michaela. "If you don't mind I'd like to invite you to my library after dinner. There is a lot we have to talk about."

Michaela couldn't believe it. What a coincidence! It would be nice to talk to someone who had known father. "I'd like that. But first I'll have to put a little girl to bed." Turning to Hannah she added, "And sing a lullaby. Right, sweetheart?" The child nodded eagerly.

It had been a pleasant talk. They had questioned each other about the past and present so Michaela felt a little piece of home in this strange place. When she was passing Sandra's room later, she heard the same music like the other afternoon, as well as the young woman's laughter and Sully's deep voice. She felt a sudden pang of an emotion that she had forbidden herself. Deciding to ignore it she went to her own room, straightening and lifting her chin up.

The next morning the women were busy with the ceremony's preparation for the afternoon. There were things the chambermaids couldn't do like creating the perfect hairstyle for the bride. So it was Michaela's job. Sandra was teaching Hannah how to throw the rose petals, while the men had important things to do as well, like distracting the groom. The best way was to have a billiard match.

However, Sully had excused himself. He needed fresh air and some quiet time to think. Last evening Daniel had renewed his suggestion. But as much as he liked the location, living in this place was out of the question, not without Michaela. She would never leave Colorado Springs, at least not now. But then Daniel had asked him to build the house and the hotel in town. That would mean he had to stay just for a while. He didn't know yet if he really wanted to do that. Sully sighed. Why couldn't he just talk to Michaela and find a solution together with her? He had noticed at breakfast that her behaviour towards him had become formal again. But she had secretly watched him. He knew it because he had caught her looking at him when he talked to Sandra. He could only hope she hadn't heard them that evening and wished he had never agreed to the dance lessons. He still went about the steps clumsily, but Sandra had assured him a woman in love would look over it. A woman in love…How he wished it was true!

More guests arrived in the course of the morning and by afternoon almost seventy people were present. The ceremony would begin soon. In their room Michaela dressed Hannah in a new beautiful white gown.The girl was excited and couldn't keep still for one moment. But her Ma didn't seem to notice it. She was caught in her own thoughts. Michaela wasn't sure if she really wanted to put on the dress she had brought along hoping to surprise Sully. She had packed her things before that morning at the reservation. Maybe she would just take the light-blue one… Turning her attention to Hannah again she was amused at the sight of her with reddened cheeks because all of the excitement. "If you don't calm down young lady, you will be worn out very soon and fall asleep during the ceremony." The girl shook her head resolutely. That would never happen. She wanted to see her Ma and her Pa dancing and eagerly asked, "You now dess?"

Michaela had to smile at her daughter's antics. "Alright, I'll do it now. And after that I'll put the ribbons in your hair. But, you will have to stop hopping around then or you will lose them."

Hannah just nodded and sat down on the edge of the bed to watch her Ma. There were two dresses hung on the wardrobe's door. When her Ma reached for one of them the girl instantly objected. "Wong, Ma!"

Michaela turned to her irresolutely. "Sweetheart, I think I should…"

But the child was insistent. "'pise, 'member?"

"I really don't know, Hannah. Your father and I…"

Climbing down from the bed Hannah begged, "Pease!" Reaching her Ma she hugged her legs and repeated, "Pease!"

Stroking the blond hair Michaela sighed. Bending her head back she momentarily closed her eyes and then decided, "Alright, I'll do it for you."

Hannah hugged her Ma's legs even tighter. _That had been difficult!_

As a flower girl Hannah had to wait outside with other children while Michaela took her seat in the room where the ceremony took place. Daniel already stood next to an improvised altar awaiting his bride. By his sidewas a tall, dark stranger in a perfect fitting black suit. Something about him was familiar, Michaela just couldn't put her finger on it. But when he turned in her direction, she gasped. Blushing, she instantly covered her mouth with her hand. It was Sully, clean shaven and his hair was slicked back. He looked incredibly handsome and when their gazes met for a moment, her blush deepened even further.

The ceremony had been pleasant. Nobody stumbled, Hannah threw all the petals as Sandra had taught her and the priest didn't speak too long.

Sully was relieved when it was finally finished. He didn't like to stand in front of all guests and could tell that some women were staring at him. He didn't like that either, and he knew it wasn't over yet. Though he longed to hold Michaela in his arms, he hated the idea of dancing. He was sure he would step on her toes. Sighing, he decided to look for her on the pretext of looking for Hannah.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 25 

Sully hadn't found Dr. Mike and Hannah yet. The dining room was terribly crowded because everyone seemed to have been by the buffet, which had been built there, at the same time.

"You are looking lonely, do you want some company?" A young woman expectantly gazed at Sully.

He hadn't noticed her approaching him because he was still thinking about how to tell Dr.Mike that he had made a decision regarding Daniel's suggestion. So he was startled when he suddenly heard the strange voice. "Uhm, thank you ma'am. But there is no need for that." He tried to be polite.

Much to his relief he saw Michaela and his daughter appearing at the door. But that easy feeling was quickly replaced by a shyness and excitement he had never experienced before. He had met many pretty women in his life but what his eyes were seeing now took his breath away. Michaela looked gorgeous in her rich sky blue dress laced with a white collar. It fit like a glove and emphasized her body at the right places. Attempting to dismiss that thought Sully tentatively waved to them. Feeling like a tong-tied schoolboy he only smiled when they joined him.

Michaela had her difficulties as well. She had never seen him in a suit before and noticed for the first time that he was not only handsome but a strong man as well. He looked very impressive and his sight made her heart pound faster.

They stood in an awkward silence for a moment but Hannah saved them as she did quite often lately. She lifted up her little arms to hold her hands up to Sully, "'mell, Pa. Roses!"

Thankful for the distraction he bent down and sniffed at her palms. "Smells good, sweet girl, as if you've turned into a rose. But I hope you have no thorns." Tickling her sides he made Hannah giggle. Straightening again he looked at Michaela. "If you've got some time later I wanna talk to you."

She looked questioningly up at him. "Why don't we talk right now?"

He hesitated. Then he cleared his throat. "I'd rather talk to you alone, without little ears listening." He glanced down at his daughter.

Michaela was wondering what his topic would be but agreed. "Of course, we can talk after I have put her to bed."

Hannah instantly objected. "No bed. Ma 'n Pa dance!"

Blushing, Michaela glanced at Sully and then turned to the little girl, "First we have to eat something, alright?"

He had noticed that look and hoped it meant she wouldn't refuse if he asked her later.

The buffet had offered a wide selection and plenty of food and after tending to it, the crowd gradually moved into the large living room. The furniture had been rearranged so that the center of the room was now reserved for dancing. A string quartet took a seat on one end of the room. With a flourish from the violin and the viola the newlywed couple was called onto the dance floor. In front of all of their guests Daniel and Sophy looked radiant with happiness. At this sight Sully was almost wistfully thinking about his own lonely wedding day with only Maude and the Cooper's as the guests. Of course Abigail and him had been happy, but that feeling of acceptance by family and friends had been missed. But there was no use in thinking about that now, that's why he turned his attention back to the present. Next to him stood the most beautiful woman holding his sweet daughter balancing on her hips. That was another new aspect about Michaela he never had expected. She didn't care about her expensive dress, she only wanted for the child to feel fine.

Michaela was caught in her own thoughts. She had never troubled herself about getting married. Of course she believed in love. But to love someone wasn't only about feelings but trust as well. She almost had dared to trust again and where had that been leading her? After allowing her emotions to soar free a little bit she couldn't get them under control again now… The music of the first dance brought her mind back to the events around her.

The groom led the bride around the floor and for the first few turns they were alone. Then they were joined by some other couples. While Hannah was watching the dancing people wide-eyed, Michaela and Sully stood next to each other somewhat awkwardly. Neither dared to look at the other and both felt the tension between them.

"_What if he won't ask me?"_ was all she thought.

"_What if she says no?"_ was his fear.

When the orchestra began another tune Mr. Wilson stepped to them. "Mr. Sully, if you don't mind I would like to take Mike out to the dance floor."

"Of course I don't mind, Mr. Wilson." He kept his face impassive.

Carl's face lit up when he turned to Michaela. "May I?" He held his hand out to her.

After glancing at Sully, who still didn't show any sign of emotion, she glanced down at Hannah. "What do you think, should I?" The girl nodded eagerly, she wanted to see her Ma dance.

"Alright then." Michaela handed the child over to her father. Turning back to "Uncle" Carl she gave him her hand.

When they began to waltz, she did it tentatively at first. She hadn't danced in a while, not since she had left Boston to be precise. But when they fell in rhythm with one another it became obvious that they were both accomplished dancers. Carl attempted more complex moves and Michaela went right with him. They were dancing so brilliantly that other couples stopped to make more place for them. Soon they were the only dancers on the floor, surrounded by a circle of watching people.

Hannah was enthusiastic. She sure had the most beautiful Ma. But Sully felt his heart sink, he could never keep up with that. He was reminded once more that they came from completely different worlds. How could he ask her to dance with him now? He had only learned not to stumble too often when he silently counted one, two, three. He had been a fool when he had thought she might enjoy dancing with him.

When the music ended, Carl bowed slightly and Michaela gave him a small curtsy. People clapped and when the orchestra started another tune soon all were dancing again.

Coming back to Sully's side Michaela was still radiating. "I didn't know that I've missed dancing so much." She reached out to take Hannah in her arms. But the girl shook her head. "You dance with Pa now." When Sully saw the expectant look on the little face he cleared his throat. "Your Ma needs a break first." He put his daughter down and patted her head. Then he turned and quickly left the room.

Michaela was puzzled. Had she done something wrong? She didn't know what it could be and decided to dismiss any unpleasent thoughts to enjoy the evening.

During the next two hours Sully didn't come back. From time to time she was asked for a dance. First she hesitated to agree because it had been Sully who had invited her to the event. But when he didn't show up she accepted some of the offers when there was someone else to watch Hannah.

But now it was far beyond the toddler's bedtime. The little girl sat on a huge leather armchair and Michaela knelt down in front of her. "You have to go to bed, sweetheart."

For the first time in her life the child didn't want to obey. She shook her head. "Ma 'n Pa first dance." She crossed the arms in front of her chest and pouted.

Michaela sighed. "Hannah, maybe your Pa doesn't want to dance at all. I haven't seen him since he left. Have you?" The girl didn't budge. Her Ma tried again. "Sweetheart…"

Sully had spent the last couple of hours out on the porch. Occasionally he was joined by other men who came for smoking or getting fresh air. He had debated with himself if he should ask her or not. Feeling the cold drenching through his suit he finally admitted that he didn't only feel like a schoolboy but acted like one, too. It was time to show he was a man.

When he entered the living room he saw how Michaela and his daughter didn't agree about a topic. Curious what that could be he approached them.

Hannah spotted him first. "Pa!"

Reaching the chair he bent down to stroke the soft blond hair. "What is it, sweet girl?"

Now the first tears appeared in the girl's eyes. "No bed, dance!"

Puzzled he looked at Michaela. "What does that mean?"

She blushed in embarrassment. "Hannah doesn't want to go to bed until she had seen us dancing together."

Suddenly aware that he had left her alone all evening he silently scolded himself. She was only there because he had insisted. He was wondering if he would ever act like he should when it came to her. "Well, then why don't we do her that favor, what do you think?" He tried to make the situation easier and smiled at Michaela.

These pleading blue eyes were her undoing, so she just nodded and rose. Sully grinned in satisfaction. Straightening up as well he winked at his daughter. "Watch us, sweet girl. But stay in that chair, alright?" With a contented smile Hannah nodded and adjusted herself more comfortable.

Turning to the beautiful woman next to him he asked, "Shall we?" and without waiting for her response he laid his right hand on the small of her back, gently leading her towards the dance floor.

When they arrived there, another waltz began. Determined to ignore the returning inhibition Sully initiated the first steps, but it turned out a little bit stiff and he even stepped on her feet. Noticing his inexperience Michaela instantly felt better. For some reason she liked the fact that he didn't just swirl her around like the other men had. Bending her head back to look up in his face she whispered at him, "Try tofeel the music."

He didn't understand the words but he felt that she didn't mind him being clumsy. Smiling down at her, his nervousness left him and the magic between them was building again. He became fully aware of her small hand in his left one and the fabric of her dress beneath his right palm seemed to vanish.

Michaela felt how his strong muscles moved under her grip on his back. His suit still held the smell of the fresh air from the porch, but he had used an aftershave which made her senses reel. It was as if their bodies were magnets with different poles, unable to stop the mutual attraction. Acknowledging that feeling she gave in for a few beats. Sensing how she relaxed Sully pulled her even closer. Now the top of her head was almost under his chin and he couldn't resist bending his head to fully inhale the light smell of her perfume. Their bodies almost touched and both could feel the heat building between them. When his thumb began to caress the back of her hand, Michaela knew she had to do something or she would lay her head against his chest within the next moment. So she took a deep breath and looked up at him. When her gaze met his blue eyes she ran the risk to lose herself completely. She tried to compose herself, asking, "What was it you wanted to tell me?"

Snapping back into reality Sully knew he couldn't ignore that question. Tightening his grip on her he answered, "I've made a decision about Daniel's suggestion. I wanna stay…"

She immediately stopped dancing and let her hand fall down from his back. Freeing her other one from his grip, she took one step back.

He hastily assured, "I only wanna build his house and maybe the hotel. I can't deny him that. You know he saved my life back in that cave-in."

"Of course." She was back in her shell. "I understand. What about your daughter?"

He swallowed, knowing that part would be even harder. "Well, I don't wanna abandon her again and since we get along really well by now I thought…"

She took another step away from him. "I understand that, too. Then I think I should leave as soon as possible." She had to get out of here or she would break down in front of all the strangers.

When Sully saw her turn to leave he grasped for her arm to hold her back. "It ain't forever, just for a few weeks. Then we come back to Colorado Springs. My home is there, you know that."

"Sure."

He could tell that she didn't believe him one single word. "Michaela, please, I've made a promise to my friend, the only friend I had for a very long time. We'll come back as soon as I'm finished…"

A sudden burst of activity interrupted them. When Sandra's call was heard, "Dr. Mike, hurry!" she immediately left Sully to rush in the direction of her voice.

She grew even more concerned when she noticed she had to hurry towards the chair where they had left Hannah. Pushing people aside she reached Sandra who kneeled on the floor next to the unconscious child.

"What happened?" Michaela asked in her professional manner.

Still shocked Sandra answered, "It seems she had climbed on the armrest of the chair to have a better sight on you dancing and then she slipped down."

In the meantime Sully was there, too. He pushed the gaping people back. "Go back to dancing. There's nothing to stare at."

Going down on his knees next to Michaela he anxiously asked her, "What is it, is she…?"

The doctor was curt. "I have to examine her first."

It turned out that the girl had a broken leg and was in a state of shock. When she woke up again, Hannah called for her Ma and her Pa. Recognizing them next to her she smiled through the tears. "Ma 'n Pa dance."

Brushing back the hair from the child's forehead, Michaela assured her, "Yes, we did." She paused for a moment and then added, "Hannah, your leg is broken. I have to set it so we can take you upstairs to your bed. It will hurt, but your Pa is here and he will help you."

Without looking at Sully she told him, "Just hold her head."

Half an hour later Hannah lay in her bed both her parents next to her. Michaela had given her some laudanum and she soon drifted into a healing sleep. Sully looked at the doctor. "Will she be alright?"

"Of course, it will just need some time." The doctor was still curt.

Sully sighed in exasperation. "Michaela, I've told you we'll come back." When he didn't gain a reaction he changed the subject. "You ain't gonna leave now, are you? Because I could start with the plannings right now and get as much ready…"

She cut him off. "I'll stay as long as I'm needed, but Colorado Springs needs its doctor, too. As you know I have a contract there."

He stared at her, not wanting to believe what he'd just heard. "You're actually leaving her when she's sick?"

She shot a look at him. "I've said I will stay as long as she needs a doctor. And I'm not the one who leaves her. You wanted her to stay here anyway, remember?"

He raised his voice. "I've told you it's just for a few weeks…"

"Shhh!" She interrupted him. "You better go now. I don't want her to wake up again and I'm sure you don't want that either. And I suggest that we do not tell her about your plans yet. You can do that later, when she is out of the woods. Good night, Sully." She leaned back in her chair. She closed her eyes, refusing to look at him. Without another word, Sully left the room. When she heard the door shut, she allowed the tears, which were held behind her eyelids, to freely flow down.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 26 

Michaela tried to collect her thoughts but she couldn't. … Whom was she kidding when she thought she could handle that situation? She remembered it all…his angry eyes when she first saw him in the yard of the homestead … his leaving because he had made a promise… the kiss that had made her lose herself in his embrace …the almost triumphant look on his face when he knew he had drawn her dream …his facial expression when he told another woman he believed they were the same "Yes, we are"… his whispered words on the train, "I'm sorry" … and today, "I will stay…" First she had allowed him to cross the line she had drawn around herself by letting him touch her, kiss her. Even worse, she had let herself believe there could be someone who understood and accepted her. During the time she had nursed him back to health after he had been shot she began to hope he was different from other men. He had poured his heart out to her. She could not only see the wounds on his soul but that he deeply cared for his friends and family and everyone in need. Sensing their mutual attraction, hope had entered her thoughts. This evening he had crushed her once again and her memories about what she had witnessed at the reservation still sent a chill to her heart. She had to get out of that relationship or whatever it was…She had had enough of that back and forth…She had to find a way to steady her emotions again…

Hannah's moan made her focus again. Bending over her little girl she took her pulse and felt her forehead for a fever. No change for the worse. Lifting the quilt to take a look at the leg she made sure that there was no swelling. If there was still no sign of it in the morning she could be sure that the healing process would make its progress. After covering the child again the doctor sat back on the chair. She had to think what to tell Hannah. She had to be careful to not disturb her still fragile trust in her father. She would use her profession as a doctor to explain why she had to go…

A soft knock interrupted her train of thoughts. She rose from her seat and walked to the door. Opening it she saw Carl Wilson. The man was concerned; after all, the accident had happened in his house and so he wanted to know, "Is there anything I can do?"

Michaela smiled at him tiredly. "No, thank you. Hannah is sleeping now. All she will further need is to rest her leg. That will become the difficult part."

Seeing the remainder of tears on her face he wasn't convinced yet. "What about you, are you alright?"

"Of course, I'm fine. Thank you for asking."

Carl could tell that she wasn't fine at all but decided not to press her. He would see how she was doing in the morning. Since he had found out that she was Josef Quinn's youngest daughter he felt the urge to watch over her like a father would do. So he accepted her obvious wish to be alone. "Alright then, good night," and went back to the wedding party downstairs.

Sully leaned against the door inside of his room. Hearing the hushed voices he wondered if something was wrong but he didn't dare go back to her. She had been so angry…No, angry wasn't the right word. Maybe hurt or disappointed or even all of that together…Why didn't she believe him when he said they would come back? But thinking about the way he had been acting since she knew him, Sully acknowledged that it was his fault. First he had frightened her with his harsh actions to claim his daughter. Afterwards, he had regretted it, and she had believed him that he did so. Then he had vanished without even thinking how it would impact on Hannah. Nevertheless, they had all grown closer during his time at the homestead. He had felt how Michaela relaxed in his presence, and he knew she enjoyed their touches and soft kisses. Then there was the situation at the reservation. Sully was still wondering what had got into him when he'd responded to Flying Sun's actions the way he did. But if he didn't know it himself, how could he expect that Michaela could understand and forgive him? So, what should he do now? There was only one way. Daniel had to understand that he would just make the planning for the two houses. Although, he had promised…

When Sully stepped into the dining room the next morning, almost every chair was already occupied by some of the wedding guests which hadn't left yet. But for him, the room was empty, Michaela wasn't there and of course his daughter was not either.

"Mr. Sully, over here!" Carl Wilson had noticed that he was looking for a place.

"Thanks." Sitting down Sully glanced at the older man. It was obvious that a talk was unavoidable.

"How is your daughter this morning?"

Sully shrugged. "I haven't seen her yet."

Now he had the attention of several people. Sophy asked incredulously, "Why not? Don't you want to know? I thought you care…" A kick from her new husband under the table interrupted her.

Daniel had already talked to his friend earlier and knew about the disagreement. He cleared his throat. "Maybe she's still sleeping, I havn't seen Michaela yet, either."

Sully cast his friend a thankful look. He couldn't tell all these strangers that he was afraid to face her after their falling out last evening.

But Carl made it worse again. "I saw her early this morning. I'm concerned, I have to admit, Mike didn't look well. Maybe we should make a schedule, so she doesn't have to watch the child all by herself." Sophy and Sandra nodded in agreement.

But Sully didn't want to bother anyone else. "Thank you, Mr. Wilson, but I think that ain't necessary. We can manage by ourselves."

"Whom do you mean with _we_, Mr. Sully? Michaela and Dr. Quinn? As far as I know you will be busy building a house for my daughter and her husband." The sarcasm in his tone couldn't be ignored.

Slightly blushing in embarrassment, Sully replied, "I have to start with the plans. I can do that in my daughter's room." Losing his appetite he rose from his seat. "Excuse me."

After his friend had left the room Daniel turned to his father-in-law. "Did you have to talk to him that way? He loves his daughter and he will take care of her."

"This is nonsense, son. Mike told me yesterday evening that the girl won't be able to be allowed to move for a while. That means she has to be entertained every waking minute. Mike can't do that all by herself, even if Mr. Sully helps from time to time. We are enough people in this house, we can take turns." With this the argument was closed.

Upstairs Sully still hesitated to knock. He could hear their voices from inside. From time to time his little girl laughed and when he heard her mention his name he finally brought himself to enter the room.

In a cheerful tone he made his presence known. "Good morning sweet girl!" When both their heads turned in his direction he added hesitantly, "Dr. Mike, I hope you are alright."

Her response was flat. "Thank you, I'm fine."

Hannah was puzzled. She instantly sensed that something was wrong. Looking back and forth between them she asked anxiously, "Pa angry with Ma?"

Sully sighed. Sometimes he wished she wouldn't be so smart. "It ain't nothing for you to worry about, sweet girl. Sometimes adults just have a disagreement." He sat down on the edge of the bed so he and Michaela were facing one another.

The little girl wasn't fooled. "Pa 'n Ma mad." Her lower lip quivered.

Michaela knew the sign. Stroking the child's hair she assured her, "Everything is fine, sweetheart."

Still looking forth and back between them suddenly an idea hit the child. "Kissin'?" When neither of her parents budged, she added, "Pease!"

Her Ma sighed. "Hannah…"

But Sully thought the idea wasn't so bad and with raised eyebrows he told her, "Just do her the favor, alright?"

Michaela stared at him. What was he thinking? He just kissed her and all was forgiven and forgotten? How long should she maintain the charade? But when she heard Hannah imploring again, "Pease, Ma!" she gave in.

Sighing she bent towards Sully. Looking at him fully, she couldn't read his expression. Suddenly she saw that he lifted his hands and the next moment she felt how he cupped her face. His touch was soft and with his thumbs he caressed her cheeks. Still, Michaela had already made up her mind. She wouldn't allow him to break her wall again. But she couldn't stop the rising heat inside her and she knew she had to avoid his gaze. The pleading in his blue eyes could make her forget everything and so she let her eyelids drop.

Sully tried to communicate with her using the kiss. His lips met hers tenderly and lingered for a moment but there was no response. Moving over her mouth with his lovingly, he felt how her cheeks grew warm and that she slightly trembled. He knew she was fighting her feelings. But when she pushed on his shoulders he acknowledged, he hadn't succeeded in getting through to her.

Of course Hannah hadn't read their silent communication, she happily clapped her hands and almost forgot that she was still in pain with her leg.

Before either of them could speak again, a knock at the door broke the silence. "Dr. Quinn? There came a telegram for you!"

Michaela hurried to open the door and found herself face to face with a young man she hadn't met yet. He slightly blushed and gave her a folded piece of paper. "I thought I should wait if you wanted to answer it."

She smiled at him. "Well, that's very nice of you. Come on in," and she stepped aside so he could do so.

Sully was alarmed, a wire usually meant nothing good. When he watched Michaela reading the lines, he knew he was right. Her face paled alarmingly. "What does it say?"

She didn't answer. After handing him the paper she went to the window and stared outside. She knew she had no choice. Maybe it was best that way, she could end her relationship with this man and his daughter with one sharp cut. It would hurt but finally be brought to an end.

Sully read loudly. "Dr. Quinn, come at once. Grip is in town. First few people died. Signed Mayor Slicker." Looking at her he already knew the answer when he asked, "You won't go, will you? I mean, Hannah is sick, too..." She shot him a look that made him stop.

The little girl grew anxious. She didn't understand what was going on but she knew it was something bad. "Ma, Pa?"

Sully crawled in the bed next to his daughter. Careful not to hurt her he took Hannah into his arms. "Shh, it's gonna be alright," and he tenderly rocked her.

Michaela turned to the young man who was still standing in the middle of the room. "I'm glad you've waited. I have to send some wires myself." She went to the small desk next to the wardrobe to write them down. "One goes back to Mr. Slicker, another one to Denver for medical supplies I will need and the third one is for Robert E. I need him to send a wagon to Denver that I can use for my return to Colorado Springs. I'm sure there won't be any stage coaches as long as we have an epidemic in town." After finishing the papers she handed them to the young man. "Do you know when the next train is leaving for Salt Lake City?"

The answer came promptly. "Shortly after noon, ma'am."

"Would you book me a ticket for it please? And if it is possible one for the train from there to Denver as well. Thank you." Smiling she gave him a tip and closed the door behind him after he had left.

Before she turned back to Hannah and her father she momentarily closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Even from behind Sully recognized how she tried to compose herself. He wanted so badly to keep her beside him but he knew she couldn't deny her responsibilities as the doctor of Colorado Springs. When she finally stepped to the bed, he knew her only thoughts belonged to his daughter now.

Hannah had understood in the meantime her Ma would leave because she had wanted a ticket for the train. But why didn't she want her to go with her? She wanted to be with her Ma! The first tears started to flow down her cheeks although her Pa still held her.

"Sweetheart, many people at home are sick. They need my help so I have to go there as soon as possible." Taking her earlier position on the bed she stroked the little girl's hair. "Do you understand?"

But Hannah shook her head heavily. "No, no go! Me sick, too!"

Michaela sighed. "I know your leg hurts, but it will still heal. Some people in Colorado Springs might die if I don't go and help them." When the girl didn't want to see it yet, she added, "Grandma or Grandpa could be sick, or Colleen and Charlotte."

Michaela knew she had made her point, at least the first one, because she knew what would come next. The child looked at her with her father's eyes. Smiling through her tears she begged, "Wanna go, pease."

"Sweetheart, if we want your leg to heal properly you can't move it for at least three days. So you can't go on a trip right now." She waited if her words had met the target.

Hannah was silent for a moment. The tears fell freely again and her little body was racked with sobs. "Thee day long?" she sniffled.

Sully tried to soothe his daughter. Still rocking her he kissed her temple. "Shh, I'll be here with you, sweet girl. I'll tell you stories and do all that you want…"

While he further attempted to comfort his child, Michaela had an idea. She rose from the bed and went to her trunk. Rummaging through it, she eventually found what she had been searching for. Stepping back to the bed, she held a little wooden box in her hand. Hannah instantly recognized it and forgot for a moment her cries. She looked at her Ma wide-eyed. Sully grew curious as to what this was all about, though he understood it after seeing the content of the box. Michaela lifted a pearl necklace out of it. After opening the clasp she undid one end of the chain. Glancing at Sully she told him, "Give me one of your hands and hold it open." When he did so she let the pearls drop from the chain into his palm. They made a faint clicking sound falling down. After only the golden band was left, Michaela took one of the soft gleaming white pearls and strung it back on. Then she took two others and placed them into the box. She explained. "I want you to wear that necklace. This pearl," and she pointed at the first one, "is for day number one, which means today. Every morning when you wake up your Pa will add another one, until the box is empty. Then your three days are over and you may get up again. How does that sound?"

Hannah couldn't believe her luck. Dr. Mike had only let her take a look at the pearls from time to time, but she never had allowed her to take them into her hands. "I wear?" Her Ma nodded.

"And whenever you want me be to be with you just touch the pearls and you will feel that my heart is with you."

Sully was amazed once more how that woman handled his child. Clearing his throat he asked, "And what do we do with these pearls?" He lightly lifted his hand with the precious items.

Michaela still looked at Hannah. "Well, I would say after three days without running around a certain little girl deserved them all."

Now grinning through her tears, Hannah lifted her arms to hug her Ma.

Michaela bent down for the embrace. Sully felt her long hair on his hands and could smell the faint fragrance of her perfume again. His heart nearly broke when he heard her whisper to his daughter. "I will always love you, sweetheart. Never forget that."

Three hours later she was gone. Sully had wanted to escort her to the train station but she had refused his company. She had told him she hated parting at this place, so he was sitting with his exhausted sleeping daughter now. When he heard a knock at the door he stood up to open it. Mr. Wilson stood there and was obviously puzzled to see him. "Isn't Mike on her way to the train station?"

"Yes, she is. She left half an hour ago. Why?" It was Sully's turn to be astonished.

The older man asked, "What are you doing here then?"

Sully averted his eyes. "She didn't want my company. She told me she'd rather be alone."

Carl sighed. "Of course she told you that. You don't know much about women, am I right?" When he felt how Sully grew angry, he added, "I'm sure she thinks she has no right to bother you. But if you really care for her you won't make her go all by herself, son."

However, Sully still resisted. "Well, we had kind of a disagreement and I think I should respect her wish."

"You really want to part in anger? I had the impression you have feelings for her. Well, maybe I was wrong…"

"Of course I have feelings for her but she don't believe me anyway."

Mr. Wilson smiled and friendly slapped the younger man's shoulder. "Then make sure you tell her often enough. I'll talk to Alfredo to saddle a horse for you. The train leaves in an hour, you should be able to make that. I'll take care of your daughter, don't worry."

Ten minutes later Sully was on his way to catch up with the carriage that was taking Michaela away from him.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 27 

Sully didn't catch up with the carriage; he had to ride until he reached the train station. Spotting John who put her luggage down next to the trails, Sully scanned the place but Michaela was nowhere to be seen. Still out of breath from the frantic ride he dismounted his horse next to John, asking, "Where is she?"

Recognizing the urgency in the young man's eyes John smiled and pointed towards the station office. "She said she had to send some more telegrams."

Sully was already on his way. The door of the box car was ajar and he could hear her voice. "To Mr. Chris James, Denver…"

He almost jumped back. His heartbeat, which had just calmed down after the ride, began to quicken again. Was she looking for that teacher's company when she needed to get from Denver to Colorado Springs? Or did she want to tell him that she was free to see him now? Maybe he had misread her and she was glad to have an excuse to leave him and his daughter behind. Sully dismissed that last thought instantly; she would never do that to Hannah. Tentatively stepping closer to eavesdrop he heard her again. "…Isolate the sick. Change the schoolhouse into a temporary hospital. I'll be back no later than the day after tomorrow…"

When he heard her pay for the wires he walked away from the office. She would be furious if she knew he had been spying on her. He hadn't even thought about what to tell her at all. The only thing on his mind had been to reach her in time.

Closing her purse Michaela turned to leave the box car. During her ride to the train station she had tried to distract herself from that terrible feeling of loss by organizing her thoughts about how to keep the influenza in Colorado Springs under control. The two clinic rooms were far too small for an epidemic of that proportion. And someone had to take care that nobody entered the town. That's why she had wired Chris; she would inform him when it was safe enough again to come into town. Now she only hoped the train, that already waited for the departure, would soon carry her away from here, where she had to leave her little girl behind. What if she would never see her again…That thought made her tears rise again and she swallowed hard. Maybe she would allow them to fall when she was finally in her compartment, but not yet, not in front of all the strangers. Stepping down on the soiled street her glance suddenly fell onto a familiar shape that almost took her breath away. What was Sully doing here? First a glimmer of hope crossed her mind. Had he remembered that it was her birthday today? But she instantly dismissed that thought when she saw his facial expression. Stepping closer she asked, "What happened? Is it about Hannah?" She nearly choked speaking out the name.

While waiting for her, Sully had lost the battle against his rising anger and now he was blurting it out, "Do you really want him to come with you?"

Michaela was taken aback. What was he talking about and why did he talk to her in that tone? "I beg your pardon?"

His anger sprang at her. "No begging necessary, just the truth!"

Now she was growing angry herself. "What on earth are you talking about?"

Sully emphasized every single word. "That teacher, are you gonna go with him?"

Obviously he had been eavesdropping but only heard half. Michaela was almost speechless for a moment, then all the pent-up emotions burst the dam. "That's none of your business!" she hurled at him.

His blue eyes were afire. "Is that right?"

But she didn't flinch. "That's right."

They stared at each other. Neither of them wanted to give in. But now Sully was noticing her reddened eyes. "_She had cried! She's as devastated as I am that she's leaving! And I'm acting like a complete idiot again! How can I tell her now that I will miss her terribly?" _Regretting his actions he reached for her hand. Although Michaela had noticed the change in his eyes she was still furious. Taking one step away from him she raised her voice. "Why did you even come here?"

How could he tell her? "Because!"

She grew frustrated. "Because?"

He knew it was now or never or he would lose her for sure. "Because I love you!"

Michaela gasped. By his last words the train had just blown the whistle to announce the departure and she wasn't sure if she had understood him right. Had he actually told her what she thought she had heard? If it was true then he'd chosen a strange moment again for telling her the most important words a woman will want to hear from a man. The first time he did it after he had kissed another woman and now he had just accused her of wanting to be with another man. She didn't know what to do. And she had no time to think, she had to get on the train…

Sully knew it was his last chance. He hadn't made up his mind yet how long he would stay with his friend. But he needed to know she would still be in his life when he came back home. So he suddenly grasped for her arm and pulled her close. He enveloped her in a tight embrace. Cupping the back of her head he bent down to her ear and whispered the three words again, "I love you." After kissing her temple he added, "And I promise I'll be back."

Michaela was overwhelmed by his words and his closeness. She had told herself that she'd already succeeded in getting over him. But now she felt her heart starting to race as her knees grew weak and she knew, she had only fooled herself. She felt secure in his arms and she wanted so badly to believe him. But she knew better. Bending back, so she could gaze into his eyes she told him, "I have seen the look on your face when Daniel showed us that valley. And I know he can offer you several jobs you would never find in Colorado Springs. There are even Indians living here, Shoshone. Your friend told me so. He wants to keep you close to him and I know you want to be there for him, too."

He had forgotten how well she knew him already. But he was sure by now without Michaela his life would be empty. So he assured her again, "I promise I'll be back."

She lightly shook her head. "Don't do that. I don't want you to hurt other people because you've made a promise to me."

Sully was stunned for a moment. Cloud Dancing had told him once,_ "It was not right giving promises that can make you let down other people_." He cupped her head back against his chest. "I'll find a way, I promise." Before she could reply they were interrupted.

"Ma'am?" The young station agent shyly stepped closer and Sully let Michaela out of his embrace.

"Your luggage is aboard and you should better get on now."

Maintaining a brave façade, she nodded to the man. "Thank you, I'll do that."

Turning back to Sully Michaela found it difficult to speak. The lump in her throat made it nearly impossible. She didn't dare hope to see him or his daughter again, despite all he had just said. Time was an enemy, if Sully and Hannah had enough of it they would figure out that they could carry on their lives without her. Hannah was even young enough to completely forget her. That thought brought her tears back and she knew she had to go immediately or she would break down in front of him. While she was about to turn to the train she managed to choke out, "Good bye, Sully." The whistle of the locomotive almost swallowed her words and the first tears made their way down her cheeks.

But Sully was desperate, too. He needed her to know that she could trust him, but he couldn't think of how to get through to her. He didn't want her to go just yet, that's why he grasped for her arm again. Pulling her close he clutched her to his chest. He wanted to bury his face in her hair, but there was that stupid hat. So he let his head fall over her shoulder. Closing his eyes he whispered, "Michaela."

The way he uttered her name shattered her entire composure and Michaela decided for once in her life that it didn't matter if there was a tomorrow. Bending back, she raised her arms to cup his cheeks in her hands. She lifted his head so she could look into his eyes. When she saw they were brimmed with tears she stopped thinking and just kissed his lids. Feeling his skin so soft under her lips made her lose her train of thoughts entirely. She scattered small kisses all over his face and finally pressed her mouth against his. Surprised by her actions he forgot to respond.

"All aboard!" Michaela put her hands down to lightly push at his chest. A small sob escaped her when their lips lost contact.

She had to go but Sully wasn't ready yet. He knew he would never be. In a last desperate attempt to make the time stop he pulled her back and crashed his mouth over hers. Clinging to each other as if they were one body the kiss deepened with a passion neither of them had experienced before. Their souls melted into one and when they were parted by the words, "Ma'am, you have to hurry", it was torn into two halves.

Afterwards, Michaela didn't know how she had found her compartment and Sully only noticed his surrounding again when he pulled up his horse in front of Mr. Wilson's house.

He already suffered from her absence and when he heard the sound of his daughter's crying from inside he knew it was just the beginning. He hurried inside and found Hannah propped against pillows leaning against the headbord. She sobbed uncontrollably. Next to her stood the young woman who had spoken to him the evening before. Sully instantly rushed to his child and sat down next to her. Carefully taking her in his arms and gently rocking her he tried to soothe his little girl. Looking up at the stranger he demanded, "What's going on?"

The young woman smiled at him and reached out for his hand to introduce herself. "Now we've finally got a chance to meet properly. I'm Paula. I'm ready to take care of your daughter as long as you are here. This way you and I could get to know each other, at least I hope so."

Sully only stared at her and repeated, "What's going on?"

Paula let her outstreched hand drop and showed him her other one. In her palm appeared the chain with the pearl. "It is far too dangerous to give such a thing to a young child like her. What if she swallows it? Now, that this lady doctor is gone…"

Sully attempted to avoid yelling at that woman to not confuse Hannah further. "You have no right to tell me what is good for my daughter and what is not. Give it back to me," and he held his hand open so she could place the chain there.

Doing so she replied, "You are wrong, I know what is good for a child of such age. I'm a nanny and I know how to do my job."

While he put the chain back around Hannah's neck he set Paula straight. "Maybe you are a nanny but you ain't having a job here. And I'm telling you once more, I'm not interested in getting to know you. I'm only interested in keeping a promise to my friend and then I'm going back to Colorado. Do you understand me?"

In the meantime Hannah's necklace was on its right place again and the father was rewarded with a smile and a wet kiss from his little girl.

But Paula was insistent. "You are a man, you have no idea how to take care of a child. And she can't sleep alone as long as her leg is not healed. She might wake up in the middle of the night. I will sleep here."

Now Sully noticed a trunk next to the wardrobe that didn't belong neither to him nor Hannah. He sighed. He had enough. "I'll sleep here myself. You take your stuff and bring it back to where it came from. I don't wanna have you here, did I make myself clear?"

"But Daniel said…"

"I'll take care of my friend. Now, leave us alone." He turned his attention back to his daughter. "Hey sweet girl, how about a story?"

Acknowledging that she had been dismissed Paula gave in, at least for now. While she left the room she heard Sully asking, "What should the story be about?"

And the child answered, "'bout Ma."


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 28 

Michaela was still shaken by the depth of the passion she just had experienced. Fortunately she was alone in the compartment and so she didn't have to pay attention if she was beeing watched. Sitting on her seat she bent forward and buried her face in her hands, taking some deep breaths. Then she lifted her palms from her cheeks and only left her fingertips on her eyebrows to stroke them with light pressure. It was then that she noticed a faint trace of blood on her right palm. Wondering where it came from, she suddenly tasted some blood on her tongue, too. Now she remembered that she had felt Sully's teeth on her lips when he had started that last kiss. She hadn't known yet that kissing could be like that. It had been as if they had felt the urge to enter each other. Deciding she should take a look at it she reached for her medical bag. When she opened it, her heart skipped a beat recognizing the object on top of her medical supplies. There was the pouch Sully always wore around his neck. He had told her once, he only took it off when he slept. She knew it was true. He must have sneaked it into her bag this morning when she had left the room for a moment. Michaela's hand trembled when she tentatively touched the small leather bag. It was real, her eyes weren't playing tricks with her. Eventually taking it out, she felt the soft material. Her heart, that barely had calmed down yet, started to race full force again. When she loosened the string a little, she instantly recognized the fragrance. It was his. Inhaling deeply she was about to lose her composure again. A knot grew in her throat which she couldn't swallow down. Pressing the pouch against her cheek, she suddenly noticed small, hard items through the leather. Getting curious she opened the little bag wider to take a look inside. There lay three of the beads from his necklace on top of some dried herbs. She carefully let the small wooden pieces drop into her palm. He did for her what she had done for Hannah; he wanted her to know that he would always be close and that he would think of her! Overwhelmed that he had given her something so meaningful _and_ the pouch that was so precious to him, she finally allowed herself to believe his words, _"I will be back."_ Already feeling terribly alone without him, Michaela started to cry again and this time she welcomed the tears as her only possibility to express the loss she felt without his physical nearness.

When Michaela drove into Colorado Springs almost exactly two days later, the town seemed to be completely deserted. Turning around the bend at the fire tower, she slowly pulled the wagon to a halt in front of the clinic. During her journey by train she had had enough time to plan all of her course of actions. Fortunately she had been able to get all the ordered supplies in Denver. They had even already been loaded onto the wagon Robert E. had sent. Now she had to get a general idea about the actual situation in town.

Taking a deep breath she composed herself one last time. When she finally hopped down from the wagon, the clinic door suddenly burst open. "Thank God, you are here!" Charlotte didn't want to conceal the relief she felt. "Dr. Mike, we are at a loss about what to do. All rooms here are full and the schoolhouse is as well."

Michaela was all doctor now. She knew she wouldn't allow herself any personal thoughts until her job would be done. "How are your children, are they alright?"

The midwife nodded. "Colleen caught it but she is well already. The boys are still healthy."

"I'm glad to hear that. I want you to send them all out to the homestead. They can stay there until it is over." Michaela gave her friend a quick hug.

"What about Maude and Loren?" Charlotte frowned. "I haven't seen them the last couple of days. I don't know, Dr. Mike."

The doctor assured, "As soon as I know about the situation here, I will look after them. Now, can you show me the sick?"

Entering the examination room a terrible stench hit them. It seemed that the windows hadn't been opened for weeks. All the sick people were wrapped into warm quilts and next to one of the cots stood a bowl filled with blood. Jake sat beside another patient preparing a tubing to insert it into the man's arm. Michaela immediately went to him and gently laid her hand on the barber's arm. "Thank you Jake, I'm taking over now."

Mr. Slicker turned towards her as if he was in a trance. His exhausted face was chalk-white. "I have to give him a bloodletting so that the poison can get out of him."

Michaela was horrified by the thought of that barbaric treatment. But she knew Jake had only done what he had thought was right. And it was obvious he was sick himself. "That's alright, Jake. You can go and rest. I'm here now." Without further protest Jake rose from his sitting position but only to collapse onto the floor right after he had succeeded to stand for one moment.

"Charlotte, tell me who is here to help. We have to hurry."

It took Dr. Mike half an hour to organize the volunteers and to explain them what to do. While the rooms were aired, bowls and fresh water were brought. After the windows were closed again the doctor explained to her helpers how to cool down the sick and then she started to examine each patient. After she was done at the clinic, the same procedure followed at the schoolhouse. All in all there were more than forty people who needed treatment. Michaela hoped that the peak of the epidemic would be reached soon.

Back at the clinic, she quickly assured herself that all her instructions had been taken. Satisfied for the moment she was about to leave for the mercantile when suddenly the door flew open. Hank tried to steady himself in the doorway. His speech was more slurred than usual when he huffed at her. "I'm sick. Where's Jake?"

"I'm here now, Hank. Jake had to lie down. He caught the grippe, too. Come in, there is still a cot free, you can take it."

"I'm not staying. You ain't gonna touch me. You've already ruined my life." When the barkeeper turned to leave again, Michaela called him back. "Hank, wait! Do you really want to infect all your girls? This wouldn't do any good to your business, don't you think so?"

The saloon owner stopped and grudgingly admitted himself that this woman was right. "Darn it!" But he gave in and entered the room.

Michaela showed him the cot and Hank practically just fell down onto it. After the examination she administered a dose of quinine to him and he didn't object. But when she started to take off his shirt to cool him down he grasped her hand. "I told you, you ain't gonna touch me!"

The doctor sighed. "Which of your girls has been sick and is well again? Someone has to cool your fever down." A sudden coughing fit let her barely understand the name. "I wanna have Myra here."

After she had made sure Myra knew what to do, Michaela finally left for the mercantile. The first thing she noticed was the "Closed!" sign. This wasn't like Loren; either he had nothing to sell anymore, which was even more unlike him, or something was terribly wrong. When no one answered her knock at the front door, she tried the back. No reaction here either, but at least the door wasn't locked. Entering the mercantile she started to call for them. "Maude, Loren?"

When no one replied she made her way upstairs towards their bedroom. Knocking there again she still didn't get an answer, so she tentatively entered the room. She gasped at the sight her eyes met. It was dim in here and almost the same stench as in the clinic hit her. The old couple lay in bed. Maude didn't stir and her face was ashen, but Loren's breathing was audible. Without any further hesitation Michaela rushed to Maude's side. She felt with her fingertips on her throat for a pulse. It was weak and rapid. Now the doctor was springing into action. When she pulled away the curtains to open the window she heard Loren's hoarse whisper. "Dr. Mike? Where is Hannah?"

Michaela went to his side of the bed and sat down on the edge. Taking his hand in hers she gently explained, "I couldn't bring her with me…"

Loren interrupted her and his voice was stronger now, "Maude will be devastated. I think all that's keeping her alive is that she wants to see the child again."

Michaela knew that she couldn't tell them about the broken leg by now, maybe later. "Loren, I couldn't bring her into a town where an epidemic is raging. We'll wait until it is safe again and then we can let her come, alright?" She knew it would still last maybe two weeks. Hannah's leg should be well enough by then so that Sully and she could make the journey.

"Now, back to you. Tell me how long Maude has been in this state. When did you eat the last time? Even more important, when did you drink something?"

After she had learned that they had had nothing since the day before because Loren had passed out, Michaela made sure that everything necessary would be done. She was deeply worried about Maude's state. Her heart grew weaker and this time she wasn't sure if the older woman would be able to recover.

The next ten days Michaela was incredibly busy. She kept rushing between the clinic and the schoolhouse. Unfortunately some more people died and not every patient had been thankful for her treatment. After Jake was recovered enough, he had even started an argument with her on how to handle a patient with the grippe. Hank still barked at her when she came into earshot; but since she had managed to calm down his cough, she recognized an almost gentle tone in his constant complains. Every free minute she had was spent in the mercantile. Loren was on his feet again, but Maude had grown even weaker. In the meantime Michaela went so far as to blaming herself for leaving town at all.

During the first few days back in Colorado Springs Michaela had received some telegrams from Sully. Now it's been a week that she hadn't heard from him and she didn't know why. All that kept her going with hope was a pouch, filled with his scent that she carried with her in her medical bag, and a leather string with three beads on it. She wore it around her neck, hidden under her blouse.

The first two days after Michaela's departure Sully had spent with his daughter. He only left the room when it was necessary so that they both could help each other to live with the loss they felt. They shared the telegrams they had received by now. The one under Sully's pillow said, "Arrived in town. Don't worry if I don't send word, Horace might be sick. Your Ma and Michaela." When Sully wasn't busy with the plans for his friend's new house and the hotel, his mind was occupied by trying to find out if that tiny word "Your" belonged to her name too or not. Finally he had decided that in a wire you use as less words as possible and that the signature meant, "Your Ma and your Michaela."

On the third day the drawing plans had been done and the list Michaela had made for Hannah's treatment allowed Sully to carry his little girl around now. So father and daughter finally could join the others for breakfast this morning. Sully frowned when he saw Paula at the table because he thought that all the wedding guests had already left. Noticing his uneasiness Daniel said, "Aw, come on, Sully. When we start to build the houses you can't take your daughter with you. Since Michaela isn't here anymore, Paula can watch her."

Sully felt how Hannah's grip around his neck tightened. "I don't mean no disrespect, but I don't think she can handle my daughter. The first thing she tried was to take away the token Michaela had given her."

When Paula opened her mouth to defend her actions, Daniel shot her a warning look. They had had a talk the day before about how to act around his friend. After he had seen the blueprint he just desperately wanted that Sully would build his new home until it was done. So he tried to mediate. "She didn't know what it was, Sully. And I understood these pearls are really expensive."

"That ain't anyone's business but mine. As long as Hannah wants to wear it, she'll do so."

Sandra had watched the little girl's face. She felt so sorry for the child. Looking at her she asked, "Would you want to stay with me as long as your Pa isn't here?"

Hannah looked at her father with horror in her eyes. "Pa leave?"

Sully sighed. "I'll be back in the evening, sweet girl, I promise. The more I work outside the sooner we can go home to your Ma. How does that sound?"

Hannah's heart pounded wildly. She didn't want to be alone with all these strangers. But if she wanted to go home, she had to be brave. She would do it like she had done it before, when her Pa had brought her to the Indians for the first time. She had known then that her Ma would come to get her and the same way she knew now, she would go back to her. So the little girl turned towards Sandra, nodded and smiled shyly. Sully was relieved. "Good, that's settled then."

Every day during the next two weeks Sully went to the building site at Daniel's valley. He started as soon as there was enough light to see what he was doing. Aside from him and Daniel three other men were working out there. First they had marked the outline of the house with wood stakes and strings. Then they took care for the foundation. When they had to wait for the next delivery of stones for it, the posts and lumbers were prepared. After a week they had begun with the framing. In the evenings they only came back when it was already dark. Most of the time Sully merely saw his daughter when she was sleeping. When they talked he didn't notice the change in her demeanour. He didn't know that Paula had gradually succeeded in manipulating his little girl. All his thoughts were directed on finishing the house as soon as possible so he could go back to Colorado Springs.

Paula had patiently waited for her chance. She was a woman who always knew her own mind. When she had seen that handsome and impressive man alone at the buffet during the wedding evening, she had instantly known that she wanted him. The fire in his eyes when he got angry at her made her believe that he was full of passion. And those lips, it must been heaven to taste them! In the meantime she had seen enough of him to know that she would only get through to him by using his daughter. It should be easy, though. This child was just a terrible spoiled little girl. Paula had experience with such a case, back in Boston. Unfortunately the child's father there had married before she could make her move. This time she would be more attentive. She had witnessed the argument between Sully and that lady doctor; and as far as she knew he hadn't even accompanied her to the train. That's why she thought Sully could be interested in her if she showed him that his first impression of her had been wrong. As luck would have it, Sandra had caught a terrible cold only one day after she had started to watch the little girl. Paula had instantly volunteered to take care of Hannah. The nanny had already sat on a chair next to the bed when the child woke up that morning. Paula had given the girl no time to think; she had just bent over her, telling, "Your father wants me to be with you. He said he would be terribly sad if you don't listen to me. Remember, he had told you he has to work. And if you cry, your father will know that as well. He might be even angry then and you don't want that, do you?" Hannah had been taken by surprise and of course she had obeyed.

Well, the girl had been tamed by now, but Paula had a problem. Because of a blizzard a week ago, the telegraph had been out of comission, but yesterday the first telegram since then had been delivered for Sully. Fortunately it seemed that no one knew about it, so the wire was still in her pocket. Maybe she could keep it as a secret for a while.

At dinner all adults were gathered around the table. Sully had just joined them after telling a bedtime story to Hannah. His little girl hadn't been as eager as usual to listen to him, maybe she was just tired. Sully was worried about other things. The building wasn't making progress as quick as he wanted. Daniel always had objections. Sometimes Sully couldn't get rid of the feeling that his friend did that purposefully to keep him longer in Wells than it would be necessary. But he ached for getting back to Michaela. A few days ago a terrible feeling of foreboding had started to haunt him. He just couldn't shake it off.

Carl Wilson watched the young man next to him. He had come to admire his skills as an architect and he knew that Mike liked him very much. These facts were enough for him to be fond of him as well. "Mr. Sully, John told me that the wires are open again and Alfredo even came here to deliver one for you. Is there any good news from Michaela? I think that epidemic should be over by now."

Sully's head shot up and he looked at the older man in bewilderment. "I haven't gotten a telegram yet! Where is it?"

Paula's mind raced. If they asked at the station it would be revealed that she had taken it. She had to make sure to appear remorseful. "I'm sorry Sully, but I haven't seen you since I got it yesterday."

All heads turned in her direction. She fumbled in her pocket for the telegram . Blushing heavily she reached it across the table. Sully shot her a look and took the sheet. He opened it and while he was reading his face drained all color.

When he didn't say a word, Daniel reached for the paper and read to all of them, "Come at once. We need Hannah. Loren."


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 29 

Michaela entered the homestead for the first time since her return from Wells. Charlotte's children were with their mother again because it was sure that the epidemic was finally over. There hadn't been any new cases of the grippe for two days, and all they had to deal with was the aftermath. Michaela still had two patients with pneumonia in the clinic but they would be well again. It was Maude she was worried about. As a doctor she knew that hoping for her recovery this time would be only wishful thinking.

Leaning against the front door inside of her little home Michaela momentarily closed her eyes. Her exhaustion knew no bounds. She hadn't slept in a bed for almost two weeks now and glancing at her own next to the door, she thought it rather tempting. But she was only here to get some fresh clothes. Since she was back in Colorado Springs she hadn't had the time yet for such things like caring for laundry. Taking a deep breath she first dropped her medical bag onto the bed and then stepped to her chest of drawers. After opening it she noticed that there weren't many clean blouses left she could choose between. She decided to take one of her white ones and spread it onto the bed. Sitting down on the edge of it she took her dirty blouse off. The cold air hit her exposed skin. Shivering she hurried to put the fresh garment on and when she came to the buttons, her fingers accidentally touched the three beads she still wore on a string around her neck. Instantly her thoughts wandered to Sully. Loren had sent him a wire yesterday morning but there hasn't been an answer yet. Michaela admitted to herself that she was growing worried. Horace had assured that the telegraphs were working again. Why didn't Sully send a word? She sighed and tried not to think about what she feared.

After finishing the task with her blouse, she sat for a moment without moving, only staring at her hands on her lap. She couldn't shake off the deep sadness that rose inside of her. Eventually she reached for her bag and opened it. There it was. She took the pouch out and lifted it until it lightly touched the tip of her nose. Deeply inhaling _his _scent Michaela was overwhelmed by emotions she couldn't even name. Suddenly feeling terribly alone she let herself fall onto her side. Then she drew her legs up and slid towards the middle of her bed. She was so tired… Still clutching the pouch in her hand she promised herself, "Only one minute…"

She didn't know that it was three hours later when she woke up by hearing a noise from the porch. Not quite awake yet, she sat up and tried to listen carefully. There it was again, a scratching and a faint whine. Smiling, Michaela got up and opened the door. Seeing Wolf there, she looked around, calling, "Sully?" But there was no answer. In disappointment, she crouched down and stroked his back with her free hand. The other one still held Sully's pouch and Wolf immediately sniffed at it. His tail couldn't wag fast enough and he almost pushed her from her feet. Michaela laughed out loud. Then she hugged the animal around his neck and whispered, "I miss him, too." As if he had understood her he whined again and now he discovered something interesting at her chest. Wolf nuzzled the spot where the beads lay under the fabric and Michaela took them out. The animal first sniffled at them and then jumped with joy. Straightening again, Michaela noticed now that it would be dark soon and she startled. "Oh God, how long did I sleep?"

She had to return into town immediately and went back inside, put the pouch into her medical bag, donned on her light brown leather coat and looked quickly around to make sure everything was in its place. Outside again, she mounted Bear and rode off from the yard with Wolf in tow.

When she rode into town, Michaela first stopped at the telegraph office. She didn't have to dismount because Horace had already seen her. Stepping out on his porch he shook his head. "I'm sorry, Dr. Mike. Still nothing."

"Are you sure the telegraph is working properly everywhere? I mean, maybe…" She sounded almost desperately.

Horace felt sorry for the doctor. If it hadn't been for her, much more people would have died during the epidemic, including himself. That's why he had inquired about the telegram if it had arrived. "I asked there, Dr. Mike. They told me the wire had been delivered personally."

Tentatively he continued, "And no one had left by train the last couple of days."

Seeing her face clouding over he added, "I'll tell you as soon as there is some news."

Michaela gave him a faint smile. "Thank you, Horace."

Directing her gaze at the mercantile, she saw Loren impatiently waving for her. When she approached him on her horse he shouted impatiently, "Where have you been? Maude needs you, hurry!"

Wolf would fend for himself, and after giving Bear into Loren's care, Michaela rushed upstairs. In the dimly lit room she found Maude the way she had left her, propped against several pillows. The half-sitting position should allow her to breathe easier but it didn't help very much. Sitting down on the edge of the bed Michaela softly touched the older woman's hands that lay above the quilt. "I will examine you again, alright? Then I will see what…"

Maude lightly shook her head and spoke with great difficulty, "Don't. We both know it. I just wished…" She closed her eyes.

The doctor tried to reason with the woman she considered her friend. "I have to know if you are in pain. I could give you another dose…"

Again she couldn't finish. "Please, Dr. Mike. Just sit with me, that will do it."

Michaela sighed. She didn't want to argue so she respected the patient's wish, at least for now. She stood up again to take off her coat. After she hung it on a peg next to the door she went back to the bed and placed a chair so that she could face Maude. Hannah's grandma opened her eyes and said quietly, "I just wished I could see my little sunshine again."

Bending towards her, the doctor didn't only try to convince Maude but herself as well, "They will be here as soon as possible, I'm sure about it."

The older woman desperately wanted to believe that. Since Abigail had died and her own health becoming worse more and more, the little girl was the only joy of her life. That child was so amiable and Maude just needed to be sure that Hannah would be raised by someone who loved her. If Dr. Mike stayed as her ma, there would be no doubt about that. Could she just ask how things were between her and Sully? She wouldn't deny a dying woman an honest answer, now would she? Gathering the courage and strength Maude looked at the lady doctor she liked to consider a daughter. But before she spoke, something else caught her attention. A brown leather string with three beads stood up against Michaela's white blouse. Didn't the boy wear such beads? Hope grew into her eyes when she asked, "Did Sully give that to you?" and she pointed with her lightly shaken hand at the necklace.

Michaela looked down to see what Maude meant. Noticing that she had forgotten to put Sully's gift under her blouse, she blushed. "Oh, I…yes, he did."

Maude smiled weakly but knowingly. "Good. And since you wear it, does that mean you have feelings for him, too?"

Michaela's blush deepened. "Well,…" She remembered his lips on hers, the three whispered words and how good it had felt to be in his arms. "I…I think so." She averted her eyes.

But Maude assured her, "There is nothing wrong with that, Dr. Mike. I know the boy fell for you the moment he saw you." She paused for a moment and then asked, "Do I get my promise now?"

Michaela remembered very well that day at the clinic a few months ago when Maude had asked her to be Hannah's mother. The doctor hesitated. If she gave the promise now, she would admit that there was no hope for her patient, but there was still another reason. Saying it out loud would mean she couldn't deny it any longer to herself that she not only wanted to stay in the little girl's life but in that of the child's father as well. Michaela took a deep breath. She owed it to Maude to be honest. So she eventually looked up into her pleading eyes. "I will be Hannah's mother as long as it is within my power. I promise."

Both women were teary-eyed by now and Maude whispered, "Thank you for giving me that peace, Dr. Mike. Now I can rest."

Sully hadn't been able yet to organize the thoughts that raced through his mind. "Why did Loren send the telegram? I have to go immediately! All the other wires came from Michaela. Was it safe again? But what about my promise to Daniel? Why did they need Hannah? I have to catch the next train! Was it about Maude? Could Hannah make the journey? Why did Loren write the telegram? I have to tell Daniel. Why did Loren send the wire? _Did something happen to Michaela_?"

That last thought frightened him in a way he had never known before. He couldn't lose her. He just couldn't. Finally able to speak again, he announced, "I'm gonna be leaving with the next train."

Daniel instantly protested. "But you can't! I need you here! Maybe we can send Paula with your daughter."

Sophy was incredulous. "Daniel! He has to go! How can you even think…"

Her new husband interrupted. "Look, I can understand that you are all upset. But we have to think rationally here. We will live in the new house our whole life. That means it has to be perfect and Sully is the only one who can do it. And we don't know what really happened. Maybe we should just send a wire and ask what that is all about. Then we could still make decisions."

Sully stared at the man he had spent a big deal of his life with. When Daniel gazed back, they suddenly were the two ten year old boys again, standing on a dock in New York before they started their long journey into the West.

"_I'm gonna have my own family someday, you'll see. With children who love me and I'll love them back and their mother will never leave us. That's all I want, Daniel."_

"_That's not enough, Sully. I wanna be rich and then I can tell everyone what they have to do for me and I will have a great life."_

They still knew each well enough to know that they both were thinking of the same thing at this moment. "I know I owe you, Daniel. I owe you for saving my life and that's why I wanted to do you that favor and build you these two houses. But my father-in-law asked me to come home. He would never do that if it wasn't important. I have to think of my family."

Daniel was torn. Although he understood his friend, his desire to keep him there prevented him from being sympathetic. Everyone at the table could see that.

Before Daniel could say something that would make him lose a friend, Mr. Wilson took matters into his hand. "Mr. Sully, as for the hotel, you've made excellent blueprints and I'm sure our workers will build it exactly the way you have planned. It will be a beautiful building when it is finished, and for that I'm extremely thankful. And I'm sure if my son-in-law comes to his senses again, he will say the same thing about his new house."

As soon as her father had ended, Sophy continued. "Daniel, put yourself into Sully's place. Would you really rather stay here? He is your friend Daniel, and he is sick with worry. Look at him!"

The two men were still staring at each other. Finally Daniel sighed. "Alright, I'm just being selfish I admit. But you have to promise to come back."

A smile crossed Sully's face. "I think I've learned a lesson. No promises at the moment, my friend. I'm sure we're gonna see each other again, but I can't say when that will be."

No one had paid attention to Paula. Her mind still raced. Should she just drop her plans and let him go back with his daughter where he came from or should she try until she would be sure there was no hope for her? She had already invested a big amount of her time… "Sully, how will you travel with your daughter? She has still to be carried every step. You will need help."

All heads turned in her direction. Daniel saw a last glimpse of hope. If Paula went with Sully, maybe his friend would accompany her back here after things were normal again. So he suggested, "Paula could come with you. And you don't know if you won't need her help in Colorado Springs as well. If Michaela is sick…"

But Sully saw through his friend. "Thanks for the offer Daniel, but I'm sure I'll manage. I just take one bag with me and you forward the rest of my luggage. And as for Colorado Springs, there are enough people willing to help."

Hearing this, Paula decided to give up, at least for now. So did Daniel. Lifting his hands in defending he chuckled. "Alright, alright, I ain't gonna say anything else. I think the next train to Salt Lake City leaves tomorrow morning. If you get a connection to Denver and then immediately catch a stagecoach there, you should be home Friday by noon."

Maude died at dawn on Friday. Loren and Michaela had sat with her the entire time. Now that his wife was gone, Loren couldn't hold back his tears any longer. When Michaela tried to console him, he shook her off. "That's all your fault! You shouldn't have left the town for so long! If you'd been here from the beginning you could have prevented that! And now she had to go without seeing Hannah again!"

Although the doctor knew it was the pain about his lost that spoke, she still felt guilty. "I'm terribly sorry, Loren. I wished I could have helped her and I wished she could have seen her grandchild again." When she received no reaction from the old man she added, "I'll go and see Jake and the Reverend, so they can take care of everything." Her heart broke when she saw how Loren bent over his wife to stroke her hair and close her eyes. She left the room and gave him the time to say his good bye.

After she had talked to Mr. Slicker, Michaela had been at the clinic examining her last grippe patient before she sent him home. Now she was on her way back from the Reverend. When she walked across the meadow she felt how the tension that had kept her going on, had vanished. She had to strain for her legs to make the next step. She was sure that no one noticed that she had to deal with the grippe herself. High doses of quinine and willow bark tea had helped her to keep her fever under control. But as a doctor, she knew that she hadn't given her body the necessary rest to recover and she would still have to pay for that. If only Sully and Hannah would be here already…She was so tired…

When Michaela reached the bridge, the stage coach pulled into town coming to a halt in front of the mercantile. The door opened and Sully got out. Then someone from inside placed Hannah into Sully's outstretched arms. Eventually father and daughter turned towards her direction. Seeing the two of them, her heart started to race. Suddenly Michaela felt as if everything around her was vanishing. In her ears, a deep humming rose and then her world went black.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 30 

Balancing on the back legs of his chair with his feet crossed on the porch railing, Hank sat leaning against the wall of his saloon. He was looking at the smoke rings he puffed out enjoying himself. Out of the corner of his eye he watched the doc with Sully's wolf in tow heading back into town. Then he heard the stage coach pulling in and his interest shifted for a moment. He watched the door opening and Sully emerging. After his daughter was extended to him, a pretty young woman in a striking fancy dress appeared. But before Hank could develop some interest in her he noticed Sully's eyes widening in horror. Following his gaze he saw that Michaela lay motionlessly in the middle of the bridge.

Paula indignantly looked down on the muddy street. But she thought she shouldn't be surprised. Almost everything had turned out differently than she had imagined her planned relationship with Sully. When she first saw him at the wedding wearing that suit, it had only been his appearance that drew her to him. Then she learned he was an architect, and seeing his plans convinced her that he was a good one. That's why she had decided he would be the man she wanted to claim. He could earn enough money to make her life comfortable. Fortunately it hadn't been as difficult as she had feared to make him finally accept her help during the journey. Even Mr. Wilson had talked to Sully insistently so that he eventually gave in. But Paula's enthusiasm had been dampened the first time when she saw he wanted to go on the trip with the clothes she considered his working garb. Of course she liked how he looked in his buckskins but they sure weren't the proper clothing for traveling. Since she could do nothing about that, she decided to ignore it for now. During the ride on the train, his daughter had obeyed her and she thought he would be impressed by it but he was more concerned with his child beeing too quiet. Paula had hoped for some intimate talks with Sully so that she could learn more about him and show how educated she was. But Sully wasn't interested in any conversation. So the journey had been quite a long one. And now, when they finally reached their destination, she was shocked to see the condition of the town. There were no pavements on the street and the wooden houses weren't impressive at all. And now there was even a wild animal running across the field that looked like a wolf! She didn't want to live here. Her last hope was that Sully's house would compensate the first bad impression Colorado Springs gave her.

When she finally managed to stand on the street, Sully suddenly turned towards her and almost threw Hannah into her arms, "Hold her!"

Seeing Wolf with Michaela made him smile for a moment but when he saw his love slumping down, his heart missed a beat. For a moment Sully had the feeling that he had lost the ability to move. But then his pulse reached dizzying heights. He turned to the nanny, handed Hannah to her, turned back and started to race towards the bridge. To his astonishment he saw that there was already someone running for Michaela's help.

Hank hadn't hesitated and immediately jumped up from his chair. Tossing his cigar away he rushed towards the doc. He would never admit it but after these last two weeks he saw her in a new light. She had been the stabilizing element within all the mess in town. Jake had tried to get the situation under control but only when Michaela took matters into her hands did the panic decrease even though more people still got sick. Hank always acknowledged a strong willed person and that woman was one for sure. In a way he accepted her as evenly matched. That's why he was running towards her now. Arriving at her motionless body he didn't waste any time to look at what could be wrong. He just scooped her in his arms and rushed back towards the clinic. Meeting Sully halfway, he only yelled at him, "Open the door!"

Sully knew it was useless to argue who should carry Michaela and so he preceded them hurrying towards the clinic entrance. Opening the door he immediately started shouting for Charlotte.

After Hank had laid her body onto the examining table, Sully bent over the woman he loved and tenderly kissed her brow. Her forehead was cool and for a moment he felt relief. "No fever, thank God…" Brushing her long tresses out of her face he whispered, "Michaela! Wake up, please!"

When she still remained motionless, he opened the upper buttons of her blouse. Hank snickered, "The doc ain't gonna like it that ya undress her in bright daylight!"

But Sully only huffed at him, "Go and get Charlotte, we need help!"

The barkeeper sobered for a moment. "I think she's with Loren, Maude died this morning."

Before Sully could react the back door flew open and Colleen stormed into the room. "I heard Dr. Mike…" Charlotte's daughter suddenly stopped when she spotted the body on the examining table. "What's wrong with her?"

Sully was near screaming, "I don't know, she just doesn't wake up!" He was about to open the next button of Michaela's blouse when he saw that she wore his pearls. Momentarily the world stopped turning when it became clear to him what that meant. Even more desperate than before he implored, "You gotta help her Colleen, please!"

The girl looked helplessly back at him. "Sully, I don't know how. Maybe we should try the smelling salt. It's in her bag."

Looking around Hank saw it on the doc's desk. He handed the bag to Sully and scoffed, "I wouldn't need any help to make her feel alive again." Regaining no reaction the saloon owner announced, "Okay, I'm gonna be going again, been kinda busy."

When he left the clinic he almost ran into Paula who still carried Hannah. Stopping shortly he looked the young woman up and down, "Well, what a nice sight. If you're gonna need any help with your women Sully, just holler."

But Sully didn't listen to Hank's remarks. He watched how Colleen searched Michaela's medical bag for the smelling salt. He had seen his pouch. His heart almost burst knowing now for sure that the woman he loved returned his feelings, otherwise she wouldn't treasure his gifts the way she did. All he wanted was to look into those beautiful mismatched eyes again, hear her laughing and hold her close. He took a step backwards when Colleen finally found the phial with the salt and waved it under Dr. Mike's nose.

Michaela's eyes shot open as she gasped. First her gaze met Colleen and she could read the concern in her eyes. When the girl stepped aside, Sully along with a woman carrying Hannah in her arms came into her view. Michaela was puzzled. Was she awake? It must be a dream. Why should Sully stand there with another woman as if they were a family? Looking at her little girl again she groggily asked, "Sweetheart?" When the child only propped her thumb into her mouth, Michaela tried to get up but a dizzy spell threw her back immediately. Then her heart started to race and cold sweat began to cover her body. Now she remembered. Faintness. That's what she had feared. At all costs, she had to sleep, so she let her lids drop again.

Sully at once was back at her side. Michaela felt a hand on her shoulder and someone tenderly stroked her cheek. Then she heard the voice she had longed for. "Michaela!" It was so wonderful to think he was there! With her eyes still closed she smiled and breathed, "Sully…" He tried to get through to her. "M'chaela, tell us what to do!" Her eyes flattered open and she tried to focus. Sully's face was only a few inches away from hers. Was it really him? She was so tired she just managed to whisper, "Sleep." Then she was out again.

Sully started to panic, but when his gaze fell onto the anxious face of his daughter he composed himself for her sake. It was necessary to stay calm. Taking a deep breath he turned towards Colleen. "Do you think she wanted to tell us she just has to sleep?"

The girl replied, "Maybe, I don't know. But I think it could be possible. Since she arrived from her trip she never went home. She always sat with someone sick. And the last couple of days she was with Mrs. Bray."

"Are the recovery rooms free?" Sully had made his decision. First he would make sure that Michaela slept. Then he had to see Loren and after that he would take care of Hannah.

"One of them is cleaned. In the other one Mr. Holt had stayed until Dr. Mike had discharged him only an hour ago. I could clean it if you want me to." Colleen hesitated. "And I would like to take care of Hannah, I've missed her." She stepped toward the little girl that was still in the strange woman's arms and playfully touched her nose. Both, Colleen and Sully, frowned, when Hannah only propped her thumb in her mouth.

Paula explained, "She is tired and should take a nap. Sully, would please you show me to your home? Then I make sure that she rests."

Colleen looked questioningly at Sully as he introduced, "Colleen, this is Paula, the nanny my friend hired. Paula, this is Colleen, the daughter of Dr. Mike's friend."

Paula only nodded and Colleen wondered silently why Sully needed a nanny. Maybe this woman was more to him…But she instantly dismissed that thought. Watching his concern for Dr. Mike she knew that this was no option.

Sully turned back to Michaela, scooped her into his arms and carried her towards the free recovery room. He was worried. Michaela seemed to weigh nothing, it almost felt as if he just carried her clothes. Fortunately now Charlotte arrived and Sully instantly asked her, "Did someone notice if she ate during the last few weeks?"

The midwife was taken aback by the angry tone of his question. "Of course she ate, maybe not as regularly as normally. We've been busy, we had a lot of sick people to take care for." She sounded defensive.

Sully softened. "Sorry, I didn't mean no offense. It's only…she is light like a feather. Do you think it is exhaustion why she passed out?" He carefully placed Michaela's body onto the bed.

Charlotte watched him. "I shouldn't be surprised at all if that was the case. You know her, she never thinks of herself."

Sully nodded. He felt guilty although he knew it wasn't his fault. "I should have been here."

Charlotte tried to reassure him. "You are here now, that's all that counts and you…"

Paula's impatient voice interrupted them. "Sully, your daughter has to sleep. You should at least show me to your house so I can put her to bed."

Hannah had remained quiet as long as she could. Before they entered the clinic, Paula told her that her Pa would be angry and her Ma even sicker if she wanted to talk to them now. Although she was scared beyond all measure, she obeyed Paula. But when her Ma looked at her and called her sweetheart she needed all of her willpower not to reply. Since then her little heart pounded wildly. When Colleen had spoken to her, she didn't know if she was at allowed to speak to her friend, which is why she still didn't react. But now it was too much. She would not leave her sick Ma. Shaking her head violently she started to cry. "No! I wanna stay…"

Her last words were suppressed by Paula's hand over her mouth. "Shhh! I've told you not to disturb the adults!"

Charlotte and Sully gaped at the woman. His daughter's tears and the fear in her eyes made Sully wonder if Paula had treated his little girl this way the whole time. Maybe that's why she had been so quiet the entire time. Another wave of guilt washed over him. He instantly went to that so-called nanny and secured Hannah in his arms. Holding her close he soothingly stroke her back and whispered, "It's gonna be alright, sweet girl. Of course you can stay here if you want to."

Paula objected. "It's not up to the child making the decisions but…"

Sully cut her off. "Well, it's me who'll make the decision that she can stay if she wants to be with her Ma." Turning to Charlotte he asked, "We could place two cots in here, right?"

"Of course, Sully. But I can as well prepare the other recovery room for you and Hannah; it should be done in no time." Sully nodded thankful.

But Paula felt left out. "What about me? You don't expect me to sleep on a cot in a crowded room after two days of traveling, do you?"

For a moment Sully was unsure what to do. He hadn't given it any thought so far where she should sleep. And he sure didn't want her around his daughter anymore. "Well, we will stay at the clinic but you can go to the homestead. If Matthew is here, he could take you out there."

Questioningly, he looked at Charlotte and when she nodded he was relieved. "It's settled then."

Paula had experienced the next shock when there wasn't a carriage but only a simple wagon to bring her to Sully's homestead. Her last hope was that the house and the service there would make up for all the disappointments she had to endure so far. When the young man next to her announced, "It's right after the bend," she straightened expectantly. First she saw a little wooden shack that looked quite charming. Maybe he had built an extra house for the servants. But when Matthew pulled the wagon to a halt in front of it it dawned on Paula that this was her destination. No, no and no. Sully's way of living was not her idea and never would be. And seeing him with the doctor at the clinic she doubted that she could succeed in making him interested in her not to speak of changing him. No, she would vanish from that place as soon as possible. So she just shook her head when Matthew wanted to help her out of the wagon after he hopped down.

Michaela slept more then thirty hours. Sully had only left her side shortly when he went to Loren. The old man refused to talk to him and Sully knew he had to give him time. Fortunately Paula had left Colorado Springs this morning and since then his daughter was almost her old self again. She was only anxious because her Ma wouldn't wake up and she didn't want to leave her room. From time to time he let her lie next to Michaela. His little girl always snuggled as close as possible to her. He wished he were his daughter at those moments.

Now Hannah was taking a nap in the room next door and Sully sat on a chair close to the bed. Leaning his head against the wall he eventually fell into a restless sleep.

Michaela chose that moment to wake up. Taking a deep breath she slowly opened her eyes. Her gaze immediately fell onto Sully. She frowned. How did he get here? Then she remembered seeing him before, but there had been a woman at his side who carried Hannah. Michaela was puzzled. Had she dreamed it? Slowly she sat up. Her head felt a little dizzy that's why she leant her pillow against the headboard and let herself sink back into it. Now she could look around. Hannah was nowhere to be seen. Letting her gaze fall on Sully again she took in his sight. His face was covered with stubbles and he looked exhausted. Suddenly realizing he was actually here, her heart started to pound faster. Tentatively she touched his hand and whispered, "Sully?"

He didn't wake up. She tried it again speaking a little louder. "Sully?"

He groaned "Hm…," and opened his eyes. Seeing that Michaela was awake he bent towards her. "Hey." He couldn't conceal the relief he felt. Changing from the chair onto the edge of the bed he asked, "How are you feeling? We were worried…"

Michaela shook her head and averted her eyes. She didn't want him to be worried because of her. "There is no need for that, I just had to sleep I think. Where is Hannah?"

But Sully wasn't fooled. Tenderly he raised her chin with his fingertips and made her look at him. His tone was low. "Hey, it's me. You can tell me."

Instantly feeling all the sensations only he could awake with his touch, Michaela blushed. Lost in the blue of his eyes she admitted, "I'm still a little dizzy."

Then she suddenly remembered. "There had been a woman with you and Hannah."

"Shh, …" Sully stilled her with his fingers on her lips. "Forget about her, she meant nothing and is gone already." Detecting the doubt in her eyes he slid closer and cradled her head in his palms. Gently kissing her lids he asked, "When will you understand that my heart is yours now?"

Michaela felt his warm breath on her face and the sincerity in his voice. "Oh, Sully!"

The way she breathed his name made his heart start to race. Passion flooded his body and that made him tremble. Shakingly inhaling his breath he let his hands drop to his side and looked down. He didn't want to frighten her.

But Michaela needed to feel him. Seeing the devotion in Sully's face she let go of her fears. Cupping his cheeks in her hands she looked at him fully. She smiled when she lovingly touched his lips with hers. Growling deep in his throat Sully gave in to the inevitable. He pulled her close and carried them away from past and present into the future with a kiss that made it difficult to breathe. When they parted with swollen lips, their faces were flushed and their hearts were on fire. Michaela finally knew she was ready to say it. "I love you, too."

Sully was overwhelmed by his feelings for this woman. She had said it! His heart jumped with joy and he tightened his embrace. Cupping her head against his chest they swayed back and forth together and were silent for some moments, only reveling in the new knowledge that they didn't want to live without the other one anymore.

Now the time has to come to show if they could live _with_ one another.


End file.
